The Shameful Truth
by Flute Domination
Summary: Book Two in the Meredith series. (Sequel to "The Horrid Truth"). Please read The Horrid Truth first. Meredith now knows who she is, but is she prepared to learn all these new things about her true family? Based on fifth year events, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.
1. The Fourth of July

**Hello again! Here follows Meredith Book 2. I don't own the rights to Harry Potter. Meredith, Talitha, and the Americans are my original characters, so I do own them. Also, all the chapters that don't say anything about copying from the book are completely original. The goal was to not copy at all, but that may or may not have happened. I started writing this in December. Please enjoy.**

Chapter One: The Fourth of July

"Happy Fourth of July, everyone," Meredith Lily Snape said as she came into the Weasley kitchen for breakfast. She was greeted by blank stares.

_Shoot, I shouldn't have said that,_ Meredith thought, remembering where she was: _Britain_. No, they probably didn't celebrate Independence Day like Americans did. To be perfectly honest, Meredith thought that America sort of rubbed it in Britain's face that they had won the American Revolution. "Never mind," she said. Nobody said anything back.

Meredith had been sort of shunned by everyone in the family except Mr. and Mrs. Weasley since she had arrived there that summer. Everyone seemed a tad bit afraid of her. Meredith knew why. It was because Harry Potter had told Ron Weasley who had told his whole family that Meredith was the daughter of Professor Severus Snape, which was completely true.

Meredith would be leaving today, though. Her father had written to her saying that he was coming on the fourth of July to pick her up. Meredith had been packed for three days. On the train on the way home from Hogwarts, she had put a permanent undetectable extension charm on her backpack. The minute she got to the Weasley house, she started packing everything she owned into the backpack.

Nobody minded that she was leaving today. Actually, they all seemed a little relieved that all the tension would be over with. They _did_ all look surprised when, a few hours later, Severus Snape, the potions professor at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, knocked on the front door.

Meredith grabbed her backpack from the chair next to the fireplace and put it on. She was ready to go, simple as that. She was leaving the trunk she had borrowed from Mrs. Weasley, along with her laptop computer for Mr. Weasley. Two days before, she had gone to a library in the town Ottery St. Catchpole and used their Internet to email to herself all the documents she wanted to keep. She had also checked for any emails from her friends. There were about a million. Some were from the previous summer asking "ARE YOU SERIOUS?" with big letters and many question and exclamation marks. A few were from this June asking "SERIOUSLY, MEREDITH, ARE YOU OUT OF SCHOOL YET?" once again with many question and exclamation marks.

Meredith sent a group email to all of her friends:

_Hi guys._

_Sorry I haven't replied to anything for a while. The internet's been down here. I don't know when I'll be able to email next, but don't expect it to be soon._

_To answer most of your questions, I'M OKAY, GOSH! Don't worry about me! I'm not dead. I'm not kidnapped. Just thought I'd clarify that. (Especially for you, Marae. How often were you on the computer to have sent that many emails?)_

_I still don't have a phone number for you. Sorry. It would cost you a lot for long-distance anyway._

_School was okay this year. Still getting good grades. I hope you all are too._

_The weather here is really weird. It rains every day and gets cold on 5 minutes notice. But it snows in the winter! Jealous?_

_Well, I hope everything's going well there. I'll try to get to a library with internet again this summer, but no guarantees. Bye for now._

_-Meredith_

_PS: What was the homecoming theme this past year and who won?_

That was all. Her friends hadn't forgotten her, thankfully, even though she had to admit not having thought about them very much. There was too much else to worry about, like Voldemort.

Professor Snape walked in the door when Mrs. Weasley opened it. He was wearing his normal teacher outfit, but with black boots and a sweeping black traveling cloak.

Meredith was wearing Saturday street clothes, Saturday shoes, and her light school cloak. She was starting to like wizard wear. It was comfortable.

"Good morning, Severus," Mrs. Weasley said.

"Good morning, Molly," Severus said. Then to Meredith, "All packed and ready to go?"

"Yeah," she said.

"I will see you later this summer?" Severus asked Mrs. Weasley.

"At Grimmauld Place? Yes, of course."

"Good. Thank you so much for everything, Molly. Now, we'd best be off."

"'Bye," Meredith said to all the Weasleys present. Some of them didn't even look up. To Meredith's surprise, Mrs. Weasley hugged her before she could turn to leave.

"Goodbye, Meredith," she said, looking a little sad.

Meredith gave a little smile and walked out the door with her father, but not before glancing at the little clock that said where everyone in the family was, and noticing that she still had a spoon with her name on it.

Out on the lawn, Severus said, "I trust you have Apparated before?"

"Yeah. A few times." She remembered the last time, going to see Voldemort with her uncle Lucius Malfoy. She tried not to think about it. She took her father's arm.

They spun and ended up in a place that Meredith had never been to or seen before. They were at the edge of a large town with rows and rows of brick buildings. The sun shone weakly through a thin layer of smoky pollution, and Meredith was glad she didn't have asthma anymore. Otherwise, she probably would've died.

They walked together along the cobblestone roads without speaking. All of the houses were the exact same. Once in a while they would pass a larger brick building with lots of chimneys poking out of the roof.

They finally reached a normal-looking brick house that was just a tiny bit better maintained than the others. "Welcome home," Meredith's father said, opening the door for her.

Meredith stepped into a sitting room lined with bookshelves filled with hundreds of books. There were two leather armchairs and a sofa. Meredith looked around and then followed her father into the next room. In this room there was a glass cabinet full of little jars and phials, along with a table and two plain wooden chairs. A narrow hallway branched off into closed rooms. Severus opened the first door on the right. "This will be your room," he said.

Meredith set her bag down on the small bed and looked around the room at the bare white walls. There was a small closet without a door, a lamp, a small chest of drawers, a bed, and a chair in the corner. Those were the only furnishings.

"Will it be alright?" her father asked.

"Yeah," she replied with complete honesty. All this room needed was a few posters on the walls.

"Then I'll leave you to unpack." Her father left the room.

Meredith ran a finger down the wall. At least the place was clean. Yes, this would perfect. She unpacked all her clothes first and hung them on the closet hangers. She stacked all her books neatly next to the chest of drawers. All of Meredith's school supplies, except her school uniform, stayed in her bag on the floor of her closet with her shoes.

After she had unpacked and organized as best as she could with so little furniture, Meredith went out of her room and into the dining room, where her father was seated reading the newspaper and drinking tea.

A man came out of a door Meredith hadn't seen on her way in. He startled her, and she jumped. "What are _you_ doing here?" she asked.

"I…I live here," Wormtail said. He set a tray on the table and moved two plates from the tray to the two places at the table. He left without another word.

"Sit down," Meredith's father said as he started to eat. Meredith checked the clock on the wall and sat down. She hadn't even realized that it was lunchtime already. She started to eat the sandwich on her plate. It was okay, not nearly as good as Mrs. Weasley's cooking. That was one thing she would miss about living with the Weasleys.

"Why is Wormtail living here?" Meredith asked to break the awkward silence. She realized she had never seen her father eat at school. During feasts, he had just sipped pumpkin juice the whole time.

"The Dark Lord instructed me to keep him here until he can serve further purpose. He lives in the room behind the smallest bookcase in the sitting room."

"Oh."

Meredith finished her lunch and excused herself to "finish unpacking." All she did was stack and restack her books in different orders, some of which made sense, most of which didn't. She came into the sitting room to read for a little while before supper, ate in silence, and went to bed early. Every moment with her father seemed awkward, probably because she had known him as a mean strict teacher long before she had known him as a father. There was unspoken tension between them all the time: the fact that Meredith had never outright said that she forgave her father for sending her away. He had apologized on more than one occasion, but never in person. Meredith could tell he didn't want to bring up the subject at random. It nagged at her all the time, but there was never a right opportunity to break the awkward silence and say something.

That night, like many summer nights before, Meredith couldn't sleep. Her summer insomnia was back, but this time it was for a good reason. She got up once to lock her door, and again to check it a few minutes later. She found some matches and candles in a drawer and lit a candle.

She sat for hours, reading through all the books she had, getting bored of them two chapters in. She watched the candle burn down and leave a puddle of wax on its tray. Eventually, and she couldn't say what time, she fell asleep.


	2. Shopping

Chapter Two: Shopping (_With Severus Snape!_)

Meredith slept in the next morning until the sun was shining too brightly through her faded grey curtains. Wait, the curtains were open. The sky was grey. Great. She put on a bathrobe and unlocked her door.

She walked into the dining room and found her father there, drinking coffee and hiding behind the wizard newspaper, the _Daily Prophet_. "Sleep well?"

"Yeah," she lied, sitting down.

"Wormtail!" her father shouted, and Wormtail came scurrying out the door Meredith had seen him come out of the evening before. He set a plate of breakfast and a glass of orange juice at her place, and hurried off. Meredith sat down and began to eat.

"Is Wormtail his real name?" she asked when Wormtail had gone.

"No. His name is Peter Pettigrew, but nobody calls him that anymore." Severus put his newspaper down. "Today we will be going to Diagon Alley."

"What for? My school letter hasn't come already, has it?"

"No. But, we have a meeting with the Dark Lord in a few days and you will need something suitable to wear."

Well, _he_ was one to talk. Always wearing the exact same thing every single day. There was a pause during which Meredith hoped she would be getting a Death Eater mask to hide her face behind.

Her father continued in a lower, more serious voice. "This is when he will test you. He will test you for loyalty. Normally, people do not change sides so quickly. Especially you, because you were so obviously hateful toward the Dark Lord, and toward me, when you did not know…"

Meredith knew what he wasn't going to say with Wormtail—the little dude who had cut off his own hand to bring Voldemort back—in the house.

She finished her breakfast and went back to her room to get her clothes. There was a bathroom down the hall with a small shower.

Meredith was glad she had brought her own shampoo; there was none in the bathroom. _Eew, disgusting,_ she thought. _So _this_ is why his hair is always so greasy._

After bolting the door closed and barricading it with a step-stool she found in a corner, Meredith undressed and stepped into the shower. A spider crawled out of the drain, and she squirted it with a handful of water. It went back down the drain.

It was a rather quick shower, seeing as the water wasn't heated at all. Meredith was soon dressed and ready to leave for Diagon Alley. She packed all her Hogwarts robes, cloaks, and ties to exchange for Slytherin things. The embroidery on the robes and cloaks needed to be changed, and she would need a brand new tie.

They traveled by Floo Powder to Diagon Alley.

First, they went to Madam Malkin's shop and she changed the Gryffindor things to Slytherin. Madam Malkin was less kind and more serious to Meredith than she had been the previous summer.

Meredith quickly paid Madam Malkin, and her father led her out of the shop. "Weren't we going to get something else?" Meredith asked, pulling her cloak tighter around her thin form. It was rather cold and windy for a summer day.

"Yes, but for that, we must go somewhere else," her father replied.

Of course. They wouldn't sell Death Eater masks in public shops. Madam Malkin would have been arrested by now.

They went down some stairs into a street called Knockturn Alley. This street was much dirtier, darker, and stinkier than Diagon Alley. Meredith linked her arm in her father's and kept close to him. Most of the people she saw stared at her, but she put on the stoic indifferent face her father had taught her. She stood up straighter.

They walked into a run-down-looking shop. The bell on the door rang as they entered. A man poked his head out of a door behind the tall counter. "Ah," he said in a slightly creepy voice. "I've been expecting you. Please, come with me." The man opened the door wider for them. Meredith looked at her father, saying with her eyes, _Please don't tell me we're going in there._ But he just nodded and pulled her through the door with him.

After walking through a narrow brick hallway that made Meredith feel extremely claustrophobic and nervous, they came into a larger room with a high ceiling. Light came from a few small skylights and windows along the slanted roof. Meredith didn't like this place at all. She was afraid, though she tried not to show it.

A woman entered the shop through the side door, carrying a skinny, wet cat.

"Carmen, the young lady will need your help," the creepy old man said as he uncovered a mannequin wearing a long black dress. _Oh no,_ Meredith thought. _Please, I am _not_ wearing that._

The woman put down the cat, which scampered away quickly, and got the dress off the mannequin, along with a black piece of cloth with strings. She unfolded a tattered brown dressing screen and indicated for Meredith to step behind it.

With one last desperate glance at her father, Meredith went behind the screen.

Without a word, Carmen assisted Meredith in stripping down to her undergarments. Meredith felt extremely uncomfortable. The room was cold, and her sock feet were freezing on the cold cement floor. She felt as it the folding screen couldn't conceal anything from the two men standing nearby. (Not that there was much to hide.) She could see their dim silhouettes through the screen.

"Arms up," Carmen instructed, and Meredith obeyed. The lady slid the black thing with strings, which Meredith now realized—with horror—was a corset, over Meredith's head and began lacing the back with a strong silk ribbon.

The corset pinched and squeezed; Meredith didn't like it. She felt as though her ribs might all crack, and it was becoming difficult to breathe.

The woman gave a final yank that Meredith was sure must have broken at least two of her ribs, and tied off the ribbons. _Ouch_, was all Meredith could think. She looked down. Her body looked like a wanna-be eight-year-old supermodel's. _And I thought I was already thin as a rail,_ she thought as the woman helped her slip the black dress over her head. She zipped up the back and tied another black satin ribbon around Meredith's waist.

Meredith felt stupid. This was the twenty-first century, with ignorant teenagers on cell phones all the time, wearing scant clothing, and getting into fights, while here was Meredith, thrown back into the seventeenth century in a dress and a corset. _What_ was going on?

Carmen led Meredith out from behind the dressing screen to where her father and the creepy old man could see her. Meredith felt more stupid than she had ever felt before. Gee, if her friends from America could see her now…

They would definitely freak. Meredith herself was freaking out.

The corset was tight, but she was already getting used to it. The dress was all black and went all the way down to her ankles. There was a black satin stripe along the bottom hem that was three inches wide. The neckline went down to her collarbone and no farther. She liked that. It was probably the only thing she actually did like about the whole getup. Other than that she could dye herself green, grab a broom, and freak out tons of Muggles any day. That might be fun, but it would surely get her into big trouble with the Ministry of Magic.

The creeper guy poked a few pins into the dress, spots that needed to be hemmed or taken in. He stuck the most pins in the ends of the three-quarter-length sleeves, most likely to tighten them.

Finally, Carmen handed a pair of knee-high lace-up black boots to Meredith for her to try on. As Meredith sat down in a chair and started to tighten the laces of the boots, she realized what exactly was so creepy about this place: there was no noise whatsoever; no trees rustling in the breeze, no birds chirping, nothing. Everything was still as stone, and Meredith hated it.

The boots fit perfectly. After telling the man and woman that was the case, she went behind the screen again to change back into her regular clothes.

But when she got to the corset and untied it, Carmen pushed Meredith's hands away and retied the corset tighter than it had been before. "You keep this on," she said in a sharp tone. _How am I supposed to shower?_ Meredith wondered, but she didn't ask her question out loud. Even if she did wear the corset all the time, it wouldn't change anything about her, so she would just take it off when she got home.

By the time Meredith was changed into her normal clothes, the man had already finished magically adjusting the dress to her size. The dress and shoes were wrapped in separate boxes ready for her to take. When the man handed them to her, she put them in her expanded backpack.

Her father gave the man a curt nod and they left. "Why—" Meredith started to ask, but her father held up a hand.

"Not here," he said, putting a hand protectively on her shoulder.

Meredith was glad she was here with Severus Snape of all people. His stern glare sent beggars and creeps back to the shadows, away from Meredith. Nothing could harm her as long as her father was here.

Back in Diagon Alley, Meredith breathed a sigh of relief. It was much more cheerful here than down in Knockturn Alley.

In a shop window, she saw the Firebolt broomstick and a group of kids admiring it. She remembered what it had been like the previous summer to ride a Firebolt. It seemed like such a far away memory from so long ago, as if the memory belonged to someone else, an innocent, cheerful Meredith. Not the Meredith she was now. Yes, she had changed a lot.

She went to one of the Floo Powder network chimneys and grabbed a handful of powder from a pot on the mantle. "Snape Residence," she said, throwing the powder down.

Her father arrived at the house a minute later. "Now can you tell me?" she asked him.

"Later. Wormtail," he whispered. Then he walked quickly down the hall to his study.

"Okay." But Meredith didn't get it. She knew Wormtail was in the house and could overhear their conversation, but she couldn't understand why they couldn't just go outside to talk or something. The town was abandoned, so nobody could overhear them here, right?

Meredith went to her room and unpacked her things from the backpack. She still couldn't get used to the fact that she was in Slytherin, one of _them_. She remembered what Sirius Black had said: _Your house does not determine who you are, you do._

If she was going to go down in history as anything, it wouldn't be for being just another evil Slytherin who betrayed Harry Potter to Voldemort. _She_ would be the one to break that stereotype.

Meredith sat down on her bed. She wished her friends were here. Not the Weasleys, not Hermione, and especially not Harry, but the people who actually cared about her, not just about who her father was. _This is what Dumbledore wanted to avoid,_ she realized. _He brought Harry to my house in America to meet me so we could be friends and this wouldn't happen. So much for that plan._

So much for all of her plans too. So much for her plan to become a renowned Gryffindor, a Voldemort-fighter. So much for her reputation as a nice, sweet, smart girl. So much for living happily ever after.

She was stuck in this smoggy abandoned city without her friends, without anyone to really talk to her. If only her mother were here. If only Neville were here. If only _anyone_ except Voldemort himself were here.

She pulled the gown out of its box to hang it in her closet. She stopped and looked at herself in the dusty full-length mirror she had found in the corner of her closet. She looked completely ugly and completely ridiculous. Blue was her color, not black. Even a dark purple would have been better. Why did the color black always represent the dark side anyway? Oh yeah, it was because evil things lurked in the shadows. Knockturn Alley proved that.

The whole gown and corset thing made Meredith feel as if she were trapped in a Jane Austen novel. Without the romance, of course.

Why did she need to wear a corset? All it was doing was squeezing her ribs. She locked her door, barricaded it with a chair, and tried on the gown without the corset. It fit perfectly, and the shoulders were high enough that no undergarments showed in the least bit.

However, the dress was a tiny bit see-through, so Meredith decided to wear the corset with it, but untightened.

She changed back into her normal clothes and hung the dress on a hanger in the small closet. She put the corset in a drawer of her dresser, and was putting her boots on the floor of her closet when she noticed something peculiar. At the bottom of the back of the closet the wallboards didn't reach all the way to the floor. Meredith could see an open space under the board ends.

She carefully slid three fingers into the crack and pulled. A small door about two feet wide and three feet tall opened up. Meredith pushed her robes and gown out of the way so she could open the door completely.

Rickety wooden stairs led down to a basement-like area. Meredith got up off the floor and lit a candle on its stand. She checked to make sure the door to her room was still locked and barricaded, and went through the secret door.

As Meredith slowly went down the stairs, lanterns lit inside the secret room. She hoped this wasn't one of Wormtail's passageways. She put the candle on a table.

The whole room was covered in a layer of dust. Cobwebs hung from everything. Meredith was sure this was _not_ one of Wormtail's secret passageways. She was glad; it would have been extremely creepy if it had been.

In the center of the room was a square table with a cauldron in a wire frame. On the walls hung hundreds of tools and knives, anything anyone could need for potion making. Against one wall was a tall bookshelf. Half of the shelves were filled with potions ingredients in little jars, and the other half were filled with books. All along one side of the room ran a counter with cupboards above it. All that was on the long counter was a thick layer of dust and…

There was an open book, a quill, and an inkbottle. They looked so out of place there. Meredith walked carefully along the stone floor, which was slippery with dust, over to the open book.


	3. The Diary

Chapter Three: The Diary

The end of the quill was still black with dried ink, and the inkbottle had been tipped over, making a grey dusty stain on the wooden countertop. It had long since dried.

Meredith looked at the old book. She picked it off and wiped off the dust. The writing on the page was in neat, legible cursive until near the end. It said:

_February 14, 1997_

_Today will be the day, I just know it. If it is a boy, his name will be Sirius after my kind cousin. If it is a girl, her name will be Meredith because I always loved that name. Severus says he does not want to name the baby Sirius because he and my cousin never got along in school. He does not want to name her Meredith, either; he has said it is an old weak name, and he would name our child something strong and new._

_In other words, what I think he has been trying to say is he would name her Lily after his muggle-born school friend. He seems to still be very fond of her. Sometimes I wonder…_

_But nobody has seen her or her husband or her son since they went into hiding from He Who Must Not Be Named. I assume that my Severus has not seen her either._

_Cissy and Bella are staying here today to help around the house. I have told them I am resting, when in reality I came here. It is so kind for them to care for me in Severus's absence._

_Horace has given Severus permission to leave the school at once on short notice because of me. The classes can do without an assistant professor for a few days. I am sure Horace will understand if Severus decides to take the rest of the term, or even the rest of the school year off._

_I am sure today will be the day. I am certain. I also think it will be a girl. And she will be beautiful. I am beginning to feel strange_

Meredith knew she had just read the diary of her mother. The diary of a dead woman. February 14, 1997. Her mother must have written this only minutes before going into labor, and only hours before she died, seeing as there was no more writing after that page.

_She must've gotten up and gone to find Cissy and Bella_, Meredith figured. Judging by the state of the area, it had been left in a hurry. Meredith noticed a stool was tipped over about a foot away.

She closed the book and went back up the stairs to her own room with it. She put her mother's diary in the top drawer of her bedside table, under a set of candles and a box of matches. She had just closed the secret door and gone to un-barricade her bedroom door when there was a knock.

Meredith waited a few seconds, unlocked the door, and opened it. Her father was standing right outside. She tried to look innocent, and put on her indifferent face.

"What are you up to?" her father asked.

"Oh, nothing. Just reading some old stuff," she lied.

"You are lying. I can tell by that emotionless face of yours. It could fool the Dark Lord, but it cannot fool the one who taught it to you. I'll ask again. What are you doing?"

There was no lie that could save her now. He would know if she was lying. "I found a secret room in the back of my closet."

"Secret room? Show me."

So Meredith took her father to the small door and opened it. The lanterns turned on as soon as the door was open.

Severus Snape took one look around the room and shut the door. He took out his wand and sealed the door shut with magic. "You are not to go in there again, understood?"

Meredith nodded. "But why?" she asked her father as he was headed out the door. He stopped and turned back to look at her, but didn't answer. He walked away, shutting the door behind him.

But the one thing from the secret room that Severus did not want his daughter to have was already in her possession, sitting in a drawer under some candles and a box of matches.


	4. The Eyes Are What Matters Most

Chapter Four: The Eyes Are What Matters Most

Meredith stayed up late that night reading the diary of Talitha Black Snape, who had started writing it during her seventh year at Hogwarts. Most of that year's entries were about her crush on the quiet potions nerd, Severus Snape. Her friends had thought she was being stupid because who could love Snape? In the diary, Talitha described every detail of every one of her conversations with Severus as if the moment were the most important memory in the whole world. She even described times they made eye contact in pages of analysis: what it meant, what his eyes had said, what her eyes had said, and so on.

Some of that year and the following years were theories of Severus fancying Lily Evans, who was dating James Potter. Those entries had the tone of utter jealousy and sadness. Talitha had plots to keep Lily with James in case they ever had an argument and broke up.

In other words, Talitha wanted Severus all to herself.

When Meredith reached an entry that described Severus's marriage proposal to Talitha, Meredith marked her place in the book with a clean quill and stuffed it into her pillowcase. She was too tired to continue reading, and she suspected there would be a lot more extraneous detail, which she did not want to know about, coming up soon. She licked her fingers to put out the candle—a move she had picked up from a few movies—and curled up under the covers to sleep.

"Up for a stroll?" Meredith's father asked the next morning after breakfast. Meredith was starting to notice that he didn't ever call her by her name. From what she had read in her mother's diary, it was because he didn't like her name. He had only chosen it because that had been Talitha's dying wish.

"Sure," Meredith said. She was tired from reading for so long the night before, but that only meant she wouldn't lie awake for hours that night. That was good.

She and her father went out the front door, down the front steps, along the street called Spinner's End.

"Are you ready to face the Dark Lord?" her father asked when they were a block away from the house.

"As ready as I'll ever be," Meredith replied.

"Nervous?"

"Yeah."

"Rightfully so. This time tomorrow, we will be traveling to the edge of a wood where the Dark Lord has made his gathering place. Nobody can Apparate directly to the exact location so we will be walking a few miles." He paused for a few seconds. "Are you afraid?"

Meredith thought about it. Then she answered, "A little. But I figure if I faced him once without fainting out of fright or having a mental breakdown, it won't happen this time." _Actually, I _did_ have a mental breakdown, but I guess that was for different reasons._

"In Potter's account, you did faint."

"I got Stunned."

"I see."

"So are you ever going to explain why we're doing this?"

"Why what?"

"Why we're on both sides, but really on Dumbledore's. And why I need to dress up in Wicked Witch of the West clothes."

"Wicked Witch of the West?"

"The dress, I mean. It looks so seventeenth century."

"Ah. Well, your gown is similar to what Bellatrix Lestrange wore before she was put in Azkaban."

Meredith remembered Ron and Hermione telling her the previous summer about Azkaban, the wizard prison, which was guarded by dementors that sucked all the energy and happiness out of you. So her Aunt Bella was in prison. Great.

"You might have learned by now that the Wizarding world is, in many ways, old-fashioned compared to the Muggle way of life. As we say, if the cauldron doesn't leak, don't patch it up."

"Okay." The cauldron saying reminded her of Neville melting cauldrons. "Has there been any mail for me?"

"Yes, actually. Longbottom wrote to you to ask how you are faring and when you will be going to Diagon Alley to buy books for the year."

Meredith stopped. "You opened my mail?!"

"Well, yes, but I would have given it to you today even if you had not mentioned the post."

"But you opened my mail."

"I was curious what Longbottom had to say to you. I have seen you two sitting and talking together so much at school. I saw the expression on his face when you disappeared during the third task of the Triwizard Tournament. I was curious if there was something going on that I might need to know about?"

"We're best friends! That's all! What else would there be? I would've told you, or you would've been able to guess by the sheer number of letters I'd gotten already."

"How many letters _have_ you gotten already?"

"None! Like I said, we're just friends!"

They turned back and walked home in an awkward silence. Meredith could almost hear the wheels turning inside her father's mind. He was crazy to think what he was thinking. He was being overprotective, a very fatherly characteristic. Unfortunately, it was the only one of those he possessed.

When they got home, Severus went directly to his study and came out with Meredith's letter from Neville Longbottom. "Thank you," Meredith said, and she went to her room to read the letter. She was grateful to not be getting any hate mail from Gryffindors. The letter said:

_Meredith,_

_I hope this letter gets to you. I had to go to the wizard post office to send it, since I don't know where you live. I put your father's address on here, which was just "Cokeworth, GB." I have no idea where you are. Anyway, how are you? What's it like living with Professor Snape? Is it, well, weird? I guess it would be._

_Also, what day are you planning to be in Diagon Alley to buy schoolbooks? Maybe we could meet up there. The only school friend I've seen so far is Dean Thomas. Have you seen anyone else?_

_Please reply as soon as you can so I know I have the right address._

_See you soon,_

_Neville_

Meredith's father could pull the oddest notions out of nothing, couldn't he? Neville didn't imply at all what her father thought he did.

She wrote a reply:

_Neville,_

_I'm doing okay, thanks. I hope you're doing well too._

_I'm here, and I don't have a clue where I am either. We Apparated here from the Weasley house, where I stayed all last summer and for a few days this summer. Yeah, it's a bit awkward living with someone I only knew of as a mean teacher for the longest time. I'm getting used to it._

_Hey, I was just in Diagon Alley yesterday getting all my school stuff changed to Slytherin things. Remember, I'm switching to Slytherin this year. Bet that's going to be a big surprise to everyone at the feast. I don't know when I'll be in Diagon Alley next, but if I can, I'll tell you so we can meet up there._

_And just__ so you know, my father read your letter because he thought something was going on, and he didn't tell me about this until this morning, so I'm sorry if this is a little later than you thought it would be. And you may want to keep everything you write__free of anything he might take the wrong way. I'm telling you, he's all of a sudden really crazy. And even with me on your side, you don't want him against you, though you probably already know that from school._

_Hopefully, I'll see you soon._

_Meredith_

She sealed the letter in an envelope and wrote Neville's name and address on it. Then she went down the hall to her father's study to ask if he had an owl she could use. He had already sent his owl to Dumbledore, applying for the open position of Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, but the post owl that had delivered Neville's letter a few days before was still waiting for a reply, so Meredith used that one.

Meredith sent off the owl with the letter in its beak, glad that her father hadn't read this letter.

Meredith spent the rest of the day reading her mother's diary, skipping the graphic parts.

Talitha seemed to mature over the course of a few pages. By 1995, she no longer had plans to keep Lily and James together because she figured if the couple was married, they wouldn't break apart. A few entries were very deep essays about the Dark Lord and what was going to happen regarding him. Some of the things the Dark Lord had done frightened Meredith. She became even more nervous about meeting him the next day.

She had just finished reading the last entry for the fifth time when Meredith heard a knock on her door. She jumped, then hurriedly closed the diary and hid it in her pillowcase. She grabbed the closest book—_Eragon_—and opened it to a random page as she unlocked and opened the door.

Her father was standing in the doorway. "Time for supper," he said. Then, "You've been awfully quiet. What were you doing?"

"Reading," she answered truthfully. The lie was when she held up _Eragon_ with her finger marking a place near the end.

Severus just looked at her. He took a deep breath and said, "The eyes always tell the truth. Yours have a glint of _guilt_ to them. What were you doing?"

"Reading."

"Reading what?"

Meredith felt brave, and a little rash. She took a deep breath. "Mom's diary," she replied confidently.

"No."

"Yes."

"Show me."

It was too late. He was too late. Meredith had already read the whole diary all the way through, cover to cover. She pulled the thick leather-bound book out of her pillowcase and handed it to her father. He looked angry and astonished. He had his classroom face on, a bit like the one he had when Neville melted a cauldron.

"How far did you get?"

"I read the whole thing." Meredith half-expected to be slapped and kicked out, but she wasn't. Her father simply nodded and strode out of the room with the diary. He went directly to his study, shut the door, and did not come out.

Meredith wasn't hungry, so she put on shorts, a t-shirt, and tennis shoes and went running. She wished for an iPod or a cell phone. Something to mask the hollow ringing in her hot ears. She ran the perimeter of the town, but did not go over the surrounding hills.

Her father didn't come out of his study at all, and Meredith thought about going to check on him and apologizing for being rude. Instead, she went to bed without even changing out of her running clothes, and didn't sleep.


	5. Bitten

Chapter Five: Bitten

Meredith woke up the next morning after a troubled, weird dream, and remembered what day it was. Today was the day Voldemort would test her loyalty.

She got up, took a very quick shower (because the water was FREEZING), and got dressed in the gown she had gotten a few days before. Her mother's necklace glinted in bright contrast to the dark fabric. Meredith still didn't know exactly whether it was supposed to be a leaf or a fairy wing or something else.

She didn't look pretty, she thought, but pretty wasn't the goal. The goal appearance was "distinguished" and Meredith thought she looked just that.

Meredith did up her dark curly hair in a long braid down her back. She put on the black boots, slipped her wand into a pocket of the gown, and was ready to go.

At breakfast, Meredith drank her pumpkin juice, but couldn't manage to eat anything. She was too nervous about the day ahead. And afraid. Who wouldn't be?

Her father wasn't at breakfast, so Meredith excused herself from the table and went to her room to pace and practice clearing her mind.

She didn't know how long she had been running through ways to block her mind off from outsiders, but it seemed like only a few minutes later that her father knocked on her door. "Time to leave," he said.

Meredith followed him down the hall and into the sitting room. Severus held out his arm for Meredith to take, and soon they were spinning faster and faster, compressing…

They were standing in a field of yellow grass at the edge of a misty forest. The heat and humidity were both unbearable, especially in a long dress and boots. Meredith was glad her corset wasn't tightened all that much; otherwise she was sure she would've fainted straight away like Elizabeth from Pirates of the Caribbean.

"Do we really need to go in there?" Meredith asked her father.

"Yes. Come along." They entered the foggy wood.

Meredith was afraid already. She looked back and could hardly see the yellow field. The light coming through the treetops was grey and dim. Meredith heard an odd bird noise and jumped. This place was creepy. Not her choice of a summer vacation spot.

"Keep close," her father warned, and Meredith gladly obeyed. _Nothing can harm me while my dad is here,_ she thought to herself over and over again, just like that day in Knockturn Alley.

It felt like they had been walking forever when a branch cracked. Meredith looked around. The sound hadn't come from under her feet, nor from under her father's. She stopped. "What was that?" she asked in a fearful whisper, clinging to her father's arm.

A group of about ten men came out from behind trees ahead of and behind them. They spread out, making a circle. Severus took out his wand and pointed it around the circle.

A tall man jumped from the top branch of a tree and landed in front of Meredith and her father. He shook the earth as he hit it.

The man stood from his crouch and looked at Meredith with frighteningly red eyes. Severus stood in front of his daughter protectively, and she hid behind him like a little kid. Severus pointed his wand at the tall man.

The red-eyed man paced in front of them. "Give us the girl," he said, smiling evilly. He had stark-white teeth.

"No," Severus said.

It was then that Meredith realized who they were dealing with. Red eyes, pointed white sharp teeth, bare six-pack abs, ripped arm and chest muscles, earth-shaking thuds…_Holy Garfobawitz._ These were hard-core vampires. Not the wimpy ones that sparkled. Meredith knew one thing for certain: they were hungry.

The man's eyes blazed a darker, fiery red. "Give us the girl," he said almost sweetly, "or you both die." He was still grinning.

"No!" Severus said again.

The vampire was getting angry. He gave Meredith a look that almost made her _want_ to go with the vampires. He smiled an almost sweet smile. "I said, give us the girl or you both die."

"NO! _Stupefy!_" Severus stunned the leader. The other ten rushed at him and Meredith, who took out her wand and started Stunning vampires with the same spell her father had used. She couldn't get expelled from Hogwarts for using magic outside of school if it was self-defense, right? _Right,_ she decided. She sent spells flying left and right, but ten to two wasn't very fair. The leader was already getting up and coming right at her…

Meredith felt the leader pull her hair, wrenching her head back. She felt a pinch at the base of her neck. Pain. Pain beyond belief. Her veins were on fire. She was going to pass out; she knew it. "Dad," she tried to say. It came out as just a whisper.

Her father stunned the leader for the second time, caught Meredith as her knees gave way, and carried her, sprinting all the way, out of the forest. They were spinning again.

They were in the sitting room of the house on Spinner's End. "Hold on, Meredith," Severus said. He put her down on the sofa and ran to his cabinet of potions in the dining room. Vampire anti-venom. There it was. He uncorked the tiny bottle as he ran back to the sitting room.

Meredith felt dizzy. Her vision was going in and out of focus, making her feel nauseous, even though there was hardly anything in her stomach. She closed her eyes and focused on breathing. It was difficult. The flames were too great. Soon they would overwhelm her.

Meredith was pale. _As pale as Talitha was…_ Severus thought. Then he banished the thought from his mind. Meredith wasn't going to die. She couldn't die. Not his only daughter. His only child, for that matter. It didn't make any difference that she was Talitha's. She was flesh of his flesh. She was _his_ daughter, and she was not going to die or become one of _them_.

"Drink this," Severus said, pouring the contents of the little bottle into Meredith's mouth.

She swallowed, and immediately the fire burning her blood was quenched. Meredith fainted out of relief.

Severus pulled up a chair and waited for his daughter to wake up. She was still incredibly pale. But as long as she kept breathing, that was all that mattered. He hoped he had been in time to save her from a life of blood-thirst and murder. He ought to have been in time, for the vampire anti-venom he had given her was incredibly powerful, undiluted, and had taken months to create.

The Dark Lord would have to wait.

Meredith woke up a few days later, weak but well. The vampire venom hadn't changed her mentally; she had no desire for blood.

_Oh my goodness,_ Severus thought as he watched his daughter open her eyes for the first time in almost a week. Meredith's eyes had changed from a watery electric blue to bright sparkling lavender.


	6. Excuses, Excuses

Chapter Six: Excuses, Excuses

Meredith was sure that normal people didn't have bright purple eyes. She had read several books about people with purple eyes, but always doubted it was real. Well, here she was, living proof.

Her father said it was part of the vampire venom that the antidote potion hadn't cured. (Blue plus red equals purple, right?) The potion also hadn't taken away the two, nasty bite marks at the base of her throat. Meredith was just glad to be alive and human.

Meredith decided to keep the bite marks, and not let her father heal them with magic, as proof of what had happened. Nobody at school would ever believe her if she didn't have the bite marks as proof.

She was able to walk with help to her own bed, where she slept for a long time, drifting in and out of weird dreams. While half-asleep, she realized, _He said my name._ Her father had actually called her by her real name. _"Hold on, Meredith,"_ he had said. Meredith smiled in her sleep.

A week and a half later, Meredith was back to her normal self. Her father had sent a message to Lord Voldemort—though she didn't know how—telling him why they hadn't been at the appointed meeting. As soon as Meredith was well enough, they would go again, but this time to a different meeting place.

The morning they were to go, Meredith got into her whole getup all over again. She removed the band-aid she had kept over the scabs on her neck. Eye color could be changed with color contact lenses, but nothing she knew of could make a mark exactly like a vampire bite.

They Apparated just outside the graveyard that Voldemort had come back to life in. They walked along the rows and rows of tombstones that sent shivers up Meredith's spine. She had been here before, and it had not been pleasant.

A circle of Death Eaters was already there. Severus took his place in the circle as Voldemort called Meredith to the center.

"Oh, dear, what happened to _you_?" Voldemort asked in his mocking, high voice.

Meredith guessed by his silence that he actually expected an answer. "I got bitten… by a vampire," she said, lowering her head. She wasn't sure if she was supposed to curtsy or kneel or kiss the hem of his robes or what. She kept the surface of her mind full of innocent, non-rebellious thoughts.

Voldemort waved his wand at her, and some invisible force pulled her head back. Meredith could feel the two scabs on her neck break and start to bleed. Voldemort's face was only a few inches from her neck.

"Excuses, excuses," Voldemort said. The force holding Meredith's head vanished, and she stumbled. "Tell me, Meredith," Voldemort said, playing with his wand, "why are you so eager to join my forces when, as I recall, you were very _obstinate_ the last time I offered this?"

Meredith had this all rehearsed. She put on a sad face. "I hate Harry," she said in a barely audible voice.

"Pardon?"

"I hate Harry," she said in a louder, more confident tone.

"And why is it that you hate Harry?" Voldemort said loud enough for the whole circle of Death Eaters to hear. Meredith knew that one of them would be her uncle Lucius Malfoy.

"He's stupid. Everything's always all about him and he's the only one Dumbledore cares about. Not that I care that everything's about him, but he's also _mean_ and _arrogant_ and _moody_ all the time."

"True, true. But he was not always like that to you, was he? You would turn you back on someone who turned his back on you for something entirely not your fault, but who was your friend. Someone, perhaps, you even… _loved_?" He whispered the last word directly into her ear.

Meredith made fake tears well up in her eyes. Really it was just the pain from the bite (which was now seeping fluid down her collarbone), and the fear that made her cry, but she pretended it was Harry.

"Ah, yes. There, there. Love can be a confusing and painful thing, I've heard. Especially if it is not…returned."

Yes, let him think she'd had a crush on Harry Potter. Just let him think that. It was a great cover story.

"But how can I be certain you will not continue to be hopeful in this matter? How can I be certain you will not favor Harry Potter still?"

Meredith wiped her eyes on her sleeve. She took a deep breath and said, "Harry is a lost cause for me. There is nothing for me on that side anymore. They've already lost this war because nobody believes a fourteen-year-old boy about something this big. So I figured, why stay on that side? Harry hates me, everyone at school hates me just because I'm _his_ daughter,"—she glanced at her father—"I have no friends, I lost my whole reputation, I hardly even have a life anymore. And it's all because Harry Potter has to go spreading secrets." She shook her head. "I don't like him anymore."

"No friends? No life?" He pressed the tip of his wand into Meredith's cheek. "I could help put an end to your…misery." Meredith saw her father take a small step forward and put his hand to his sleeve, where she knew he kept his wand. "Out of curiosity, who would lament you then? Would _anyone_ cry?"

_I dare you_, Meredith thought in the back of her mind. She put on her indifferent, tough face and looked toward her father. "Nobody," she said. It wasn't true, but that didn't matter.

Voldemort turned away and walked a few steps. "What talents do you have, Miss Meredith?"

"Well, I know most of the Gryffindors on first-name terms." _Probably not anymore, though_, she thought. "And I know the Muggle world pretty well. I can get anywhere in America, really anywhere in the world, with a few days, fifty dollars, and a fast broomstick." Memorizing a map of the world in eighth grade might be paying off. Studying a detailed map of the London Underground two summers ago might be finally coming in handy also.

"Hmm. I see," Voldemort said.

Meredith heard something rustling in the grass near her feet. She looked down and saw the biggest, ugliest snake she had ever seen in her life. It must have been thirty feet long, and at least five inches in diameter. She thought about screaming, but couldn't. Eww! Gross! She absolutely _hated_ snakes. Get it _away_!

But she stood still and looked back up at Voldemort, still hiding her thoughts.

"And speaking of talents, Nagini has come to say hello. Can you speak to snakes, Meredith?"

"I don't know. I've never tried."

"Do try now."

"Hello, Nagini," she said to the snake at her feet. She swallowed.

"No, no. Fearless, I see, but no. Very unfortunate." He walked in a circle around Meredith. "You could make a very good spy in Gryffindor."

"Professor Dumbledore wants me to switch to Slytherin where I really belong."

"Very well." Voldemort turned away from her once more and walked a few steps. Then he quickly turned back around. "_Legilimens_."

Meredith let all her memories of fourth year float to the top of her mind. She deliberately kept everything a little fuzzy and muffled the sound enough that Voldemort wouldn't be able to read her letters or listen to what her father had told her about being a double agent.

When it was over, Meredith found herself lying facedown on the grass, in the graveyard once more. She did not remember falling down.

She got up quickly, brushed herself off, and faced Voldemort again. Her left temple was throbbing slightly.

"_Crucio_," Voldemort said.

Meredith couldn't hear herself scream, her ears were ringing too loudly. Too much pain. She could feel hot blood dripping down her neck into the collar of her dress. But she was determined not to break this easily.

It was over. She was lying facedown on the ground again, and again she got to her feet. This time, she had a worse headache and felt a little faint. She just wanted to fall down again and sleep.

"Good. Very good. Give me your left arm, Miss Meredith."

She held out her left arm. Voldemort grabbed her wrist and twisted so the palm of her hand was facing up.

Voldemort held his wand to Meredith's forearm. "My friends," Voldemort addressed the circle of Death Eaters. "Today we welcome a new witch into our circle. Miss Meredith Snape will be our second spy at Hogwarts School."

All of the Death Eaters said something that sounded like "Death yummy." Meredith didn't think she heard right, but everyone was trying to say it at the same time, so it was a bit unclear.

"Should I accept her and forgive all previous rejections of the Dark Arts?"

"Death yummy."

Voldemort pressed his wand harder into Meredith's forearm. Something that looked like a tattoo was forming there. It hurt almost as much as the Cruciatus Curse. Meredith looked away. This was disgusting.

When the pain subsided a little, Meredith looked back at her arm. She had a fresh tattoo of a skull with a snake coming out of its mouth, much like the Dark Mark she had seen at the quidditch world cup a year ago. She had a Dark Mark tattoo that moved like the pictures in the _Daily Prophet_. Suddenly Meredith wasn't so sure about this. Oh well. No turning back now.

"Welcome into my service, Meredith Snape," Voldemort said.

Meredith knelt down and kissed the hem of Voldemort's robes. "Thank you, my lord," she said.

As soon as they got back to the house on Spinner's End, Severus roughly pulled Meredith by her right arm to his study, shut and locked the door, and sat down. He had his teacher face on again. Meredith was grinning away.

"Exactly how much of that were you lying about?!" her father demanded, leaning across his desk.

"Nearly all of it. Why? Where you fooled?" She leaned against the door and crossed her arms, wincing as she did so. The tattoo was still stinging a little.

Some of his anger seemed to fade. "Yes, I will admit. At that distance you put up a very convincing act. Now, tell me, do you truly wish to serve the Dark Lord?"

"No, I don't. But Harry is stupid and his cause _is_ already half-lost. I nobody thinks V—"

"Do not speak his name!"

"Fine. _You-Know-Who_. Nobody thinks he's back because the Ministry of Magic has kept it all hushed up. I saw, in the papers there was nothing about it. Zip! Really, how many people can Harry convince?"

"_Meredith,_ _whose side are you on_?"

He had said her name again. _That_ was what she called progress. Or maybe he had read Talitha's diary all the way through and wanted to prove that what she had written in the last entry about him wasn't true. "I'm on Dumbledore's side." But was she really? What was so wrong about Voldemort's cause?

Oh wait. He wanted to destroy all Muggles. Meredith thought of her friends in America. She was definitely on Dumbledore's side.

"Potter can convince quite a few, I believe. But you are correct. Not nearly enough yet." He paused for a while, and seemed to shrink into his chair. "Did you love Potter?"

Hard question. Complicated answer. "For a while, I thought I did, like when he took me to the Yule Ball. But then I realized that I was just another fangirl and it didn't mean anything unless _he_ liked _me_, which I knew he didn't. I decided I didn't _like _like him anymore when we were in the graveyard last year and he gave me an angry look even though I told him I had no idea why I was there. He _is_ stupid and stubborn, though."

"Yes, just like his father was. You may go now."

"Okay. Bye."

She was halfway through the door when her father said, "Meredith?" Number three. She turned back to look at him.

"I would cry," he said.

"I know." And she left.

This room needed decoration. The walls were so drab and boring. Meredith thought about putting up a line of paper cranes around the room, but that just wouldn't be enough. She needed something unique that said this was _Meredith's Room_ instead of _a spare room_. She knew what to do: quilt the walls with origami paper.

Meredith had done this once before in America the summer she was going into her freshman year of high school. She had ordered a big box of origami paper for cheap on Amazon and covered the walls on her side of the room with it. It had been fun, but her older sister had demanded she take it down at least until she was at college, when Meredith would have the room all to herself. It screamed geekiness that only a wall full of Harry Potter posters could match. (Of course, Meredith didn't have any of those, nor did she want any.)

The bites didn't stop bleeding for a week, and during that time Meredith found herself needing to rest often. It didn't help that the Dark Mark on her arm hurt also. In the time when she wasn't exhausted or dizzy, she focused on taping sheets of different colors and patterns of origami paper together. She had kept the big pieces she had made in America, and added onto those. Her only worry was that she would run out of tape before she was finished.

When Meredith wasn't resting or taping origami paper, she was doing house chores. She dusted the bookshelves and books, washed her own clothes—because she was _not_ about to let Wormtail do it—swept the floors, and folded all the laundry. She also thought about school and other complexities in her life, and read. Her goal was to have read one whole bookcase of books from the sitting room by the end of summer vacation. Most of the books were about potions, but a few were about the mind and Occlumency. Meredith thought those were the most interesting.

Almost every day, Meredith would wander through the streets until she found a dilapidated park. She would sit on the swings and read, or lay under the willow tree by a little pond. Once or twice, she fell asleep in the shade.

When the heat was unbearable, she would go back home. Sometimes it took her a little while to get back.

And that was her summer.


	7. The Order of the Phoenix?

Chapter Seven: The Order of the Phoenix

What a lousy summer. There were no public libraries for miles around, and nobody lived in this town. Reading was, for once, becoming a bore. There was nothing to do. Meredith had explored the house to the best of her abilities, but only found locked doors. She knew her way around the streets well enough to walk with her eyes closed and not crash into anything.

Her father spent his days locked in his study, ignoring Meredith. She heard him Disapparate out of there at least once a week starting near the end of July, but she was never told where he had been going. He always returned in time for dinner, though.

The days her father was gone, Meredith would take an apple from the fruit bowl in the kitchen; then she would go outside and wander or sit next to the pond. She didn't like being in the house when only Wormtail was there. He was creepy.

It was a boring city to live in. No other teenagers were there to hang out with. No people at all. Meredith, to tell the truth, was rather lonely.

Sure, there were the letters back and forth from Neville, but there was nothing much to talk about anymore. Everything had been said already, or couldn't be said in a letter that might be intercepted by anyone. For example, Meredith had told Neville about the vampire incident, but she hadn't told him where they had been going when it happened or about the Mark on her left arm.

At supper one evening in the middle of August, Meredith decided to ask her father where he had been Apparating.

"Tomorrow. We will go for a walk. Not here."

She sighed. More waiting. She was sick of waiting for answers, but she knew her father couldn't say anything here when Wormtail might be listening in.

That night, like most nights before, Meredith stayed up late looking at the ceiling. It was the only part of the room that wasn't covered in origami paper. She pulled back the faded grey window curtains and looked out her window. The smog had lightened up just enough for her to see the moon through the clouds.

The moon. The bright orb that her friends in America would be seeing in about eight hours. She wished she could go back. Life was boring but scary here. She was homesick. Sure, being a witch was cooler than anything she had ever done before, but it was all too much. She was part of a plan to fool Lord Voldemort and bring him down; it would be hard.

She wanted to go home, to run away from all this conflict and be a normal person again. Knowing she could do magic was enough. She didn't want to be part of this anymore. It was too big and complicated. Too much extreme concentration and intense thinking.

After thinking for a week about how she should act at school, Meredith decided to act like she always had, adjusting slightly to the circumstances. She would act like a Gryffindor. She would play innocent, like nothing had happened that was her fault. She would act like she didn't have the Dark Mark on her left arm.

Maybe she could get along with Harry again. Dumbledore wanted for them to get along, right? Harry had to cool off sometime, right? He'd had all summer to do it. Wasn't that long enough? She hoped so.

"You have noticed my absences, I see," Severus said on the walk he took with his daughter the next morning.

"Yeah. No stalling. Where do you go?"

"London."

"What's in London?"

"Many things. Among them, the headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix."

_The Order of the Phoenix_. Meredith had heard of that organization. Her father had mentioned it in the letter of apology he had sent to her after the third task of the Triwizard Tournament in June. So there really _was_ such an organization, and her father _was_ part of it. "What are they doing?"

"You have a right to know, I suppose. The Order of the Phoenix is planning ways to protect Harry Potter and something else from the Dark Lord."

"What something else?"

"We are afraid the Dark Lord will use Potter to get something he did not have last time."

"_What?_"

"A prophecy."

"A prophecy. What's so important about a prophecy?"

"The prophecy is about the fate of Harry Potter and Lord –." He did not say Voldemort's name. "I heard only the first part of it, about a boy born at the end of July to parents who had already escaped the Dark Lord three times, the boy with the power to kill the Dark Lord."

"So only Harry has the power to kill You-Know-Who?"

"Yes. And knowing the prophecy—the whole prophecy—would give the Dark Lord the information he most needs: how to kill Potter before Potter kills him. Prophecies can only be retrieved by the person about whom they are made, and that is what he will use Potter for."

"Oh. Then how do you know what the prophecy is about?"

"I heard it the first time anyone ever had. That was before I was became a spy for Dumbledore."

"When you were a Death Eater?"

"Yes."

"And let me guess, you went running to You-Know-Who to tell him about the prophecy?"

Severus sighed. "Yes."

Meredith could see a great sadness in her father's eyes. "You blame yourself for her death, don't you? Lily's?"

"Yes."

They were silent the rest of the way home.

Meredith's school letter came that week. There were less pages this year than there had been the year before. There was a list of new books to buy (of which there were only two she needed to get) and a reminder that the school term would start on September first, the train left at eleven o'clock sharp from platform nine and three quarters, et cetera. There was also a new Hogsmeade visit student permission form, which her new "guardian" had to sign.

Meredith was given permission to go by Floo Powder to Diagon Alley to buy her books. Her father signed the Hogsmeade form without a second glance at it.

In Diagon Alley, Meredith found the two books she needed and also bought a blank leather-bound notebook, and a school backpack. She happened to see the front page of a newspaper someone was reading out on the Alley. There was nothing about Voldemort in the main headlines. That couldn't be good. It meant that the people weren't being informed that You-Know-Who was back. The Ministry of Magic was keeping everything hushed up, and accused Harry of being crazy. Meredith subconsciously tugged at her left sleeve.

Meredith wondered what the Order of the Phoenix had been doing. She wanted to join them and fight against Voldemort. She knew that her father hadn't told her everything about the Order of the Phoenix. She just hadn't been willing to pry for any more information after mentioning Lily.

Gee, he had really loved her, hadn't he? Meredith felt awkward living here. It was awkward that she even existed. Maybe it would have been better if she had never found out who her father was.

So, the Order of the Phoenix was trying to protect Harry Potter and a prophecy about him. That was all she had learned.

That night, Meredith stayed up late writing in the blank notebook she had bought in Diagon Alley. This would be her diary from now until all the pages were filled. There was a lot to write about, but Meredith didn't dare put half of it on paper in case the notebook fell into the wrong hands. She began on the first page:

_August 25, 2012 Spinner's End, Cokeworth, Great Britain_

_My name is Meredith Lily Snape. My father's name is Severus Snape and my dead mother was Talitha Black Snape. I was born on February 14, 1997. I think my birthday is really ironic seeing as my dad gave me to a Muggle family in America instead of keeping me. He never loved me then, and to tell the truth, I don't think he loves me now._

_I grew up in California with my adoptive Muggle father, mother, and older sister. I always thought I was adopted because I look nothing like them, but Grandma would always say that I looked like her mother._

_I am fifteen and a half years old. When I was fourteen, last summer, two wizards called Harry Potter and Albus Dumbledore came to my house in the middle of the night and told me that I'm a witch. It's true. I am a witch. I can do magic and make potions and predict the future to a minimal extent…_

She went on to describe her life in Muggle America, all she had left behind, her year at Hogwarts, everything up to the present. She only expressed her sentiments about things that wouldn't be important to Lord Voldemort if he read them.

She wrote a lot about her mother and about Lily Potter. She wrote about the secret room she had found in the back of her closet. She wrote about her new friends, and copied in all the letters to and from Neville that summer.

Around two in the morning, she was nowhere near finishing, but was extremely famished. So she grabbed her candle on its stand, put on a robe, and walked out to the dining room to get an apple from the fruit bowl.

A light was on in the sitting room. Meredith picked up an apple, put it in her pocket, and went to see who else was up this late.

Her father was sitting in an armchair there, reading the newspaper by wand light. "You're up early," he said without looking at her.

"Late, actually. You are too."

"Are you always up this late?"

Meredith shrugged. "Only on vacation. I might ask you the same question." Her father didn't answer, but kept reading the paper. He turned a page. "Did you get the Defense Against the Dark Arts job?" she asked him.

"No," he said flatly. "The position has been given to a Ministry official called Dolores Umbridge. Besides, there would be no one to fill the position as potions teacher." He looked up from his paper, then said more quietly, "The Ministry does not believe the Dark Lord has returned. Cornelius Fudge suspects that Professor Dumbledore is building an army of students to overtake the Ministry of Magic and instate Dumbledore as Minister. Professor Umbridge will not teach you anything worth knowing. I have taught you all I can about Occlumency. The rest, you must teach yourself." He rose from his chair and scanned a bookshelf. Then he pulled a book out from behind the others, handed it to Meredith, and sat back down.

The book had a solid black paper cover and was about four inches thick, ten inches tall, and eight inches wide. Meredith opened it to the first of the tissue-paper-thin pages. The first page bore the centered, large title of the book: _Everything There Is To Know About The Dark Arts—Creatures, Curses, Wizards, Defence, And More._

The second page was so full of words that Meredith could hardly read it. CONTENTS, the top said. Meredith fanned through the pages. The type was extremely small, even next to whole-page pictures and diagrams. So many words were crammed in everywhere. The last page said it was page number 3087. Wow. Even Hermione couldn't have gotten through this in a day. It would've taken her a whole year.

"Keep it safe and secret," her father said. "That is the book I use sometimes, and I was intending to base this year's curriculum on it. Ah, well."

"Thanks," Meredith said. She went back to her room with the book.

She tried to read, but her eyelids kept drooping and her eyes slid in and out of focus often enough that she couldn't get past the table of contents. Eventually, Meredith put the book in a drawer and went to sleep.

The next morning, Meredith woke up around noon and went to the lake to sit and write more in her diary. She had decided that she knew little enough about the Order of the Phoenix that Voldemort would already know everything about it that was in there if he ever got hold of her diary.

Meredith walked through the streets more and more, trying to get used to walking a lot each day. She started going to sleep earlier at night and waking up earlier in the morning to get used to the school schedule. In six days she would be taking the train back to Hogwarts. And every one of the Gryffindors would hate her for being in Slytherin this year. "Traitor," they would say. But she would ignore them all. She would put on her stoic face and once everyone found out who her father was, nobody would mess with her ever again. Even her cousin Draco Malfoy might back off. Or maybe he didn't even know she was his cousin. She'd have to tell him. Knowing that he was Professor Snape's nephew might wipe the grin off his face for a few days. It might even make him shut up for once. Boy, that would be nice.

**Hello, readers. A big thank you to all my followers and reviewers! Sorry about the uploading inconsistency lately. I should be uploading a chapter a day now. At least until school starts. Thanks for reading! -Violet**


	8. Friends and Frienemies

**This chapter contains copied dialogue (Dumbledore and Umbridge only) from the book Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. That dialogue is not original to this story, and does not belong to me.**

Chapter Eight: Friends and Frienemies

Meredith wasn't ready for September first when it arrived. But at the same time, she was overeager to _get out of that town_. Back to Hogwarts. Back to hot showers. Back to tasks that needed completing, like homework. Back to…old friends? _Would they_ still be her friends?

Meredith had packed everything she owned in her expanded backpack. This would be her "trunk" while the other backpack would be for every-day classes.

She wanted to get to the platform early so she wouldn't have to choose who to sit with. People could choose her; it didn't matter who, as long as she sat with _someone_.

Meredith side-along-Apparated with her father directly to platform 9 ¾. It was ten thirty. The train wasn't even there yet, and there was nobody else on the platform.

"I must be going. I trust you will be fine waiting here for the train?"

Meredith nodded in response.

"Good. I shall see you at Hogwarts." Her father Disapparated.

"Bye, Meredith. I love you. Have a good train ride, and don't get motion sick," Meredith whispered to herself with a sigh, walking over to a bench to sit and wait for the train. While she waited, she read from the book her father had given her. She had to point to the words with her finger as she read them to keep her place. It was a difficult read, but interesting. She found out what many of the creatures Professor Moody had mentioned last year were, and that was only in the first chapter. There were some nasty things out there. Meredith memorized some of the spells in case she met any of those. She had gotten through five pages so far. It was progress!

Fifteen minutes later when the train arrived, a few people were coming through the wall between Muggle platforms nine and ten. There were mostly overexcited, nervous first-years whose parents didn't want them to be late on the first day.

Meredith marked her place in the book, closed it, picked up her bag, and boarded the train. Unlike everyone else, she was already in Hogwarts robes. She picked a random compartment and sat down at the window seat, plopping her bag down next to her. She opened her book again and kept reading. It was weird how interesting books with no plot could be.

She braided her hair over her shoulder and tied it off with a ribbon she had gotten at Hogwarts last year. She looked out the window. Five minutes before eleven, many more people began to arrive.

Luna Lovegood stepped into the compartment. "May I sit here?" she asked in her usual airy-fairy manner.

"Sure," Meredith said, still looking out the window. A minute later, Harry and the Weasley family appeared, accompanied by a big black dog Meredith recognized as Sirius Black, Professor Moody, a man she didn't know, and a lady with pink hair. The students quickly boarded the train as the whistle blew.

The whistle blew again and the train started to move. Meredith watched the passing scenery for a few more minutes before going back to her book.

"Hi Luna. Hi Meredith. Is it okay if we take these seats?" a voice said from the doorway of the compartment. Meredith looked up and saw Ginny, Neville, and Harry standing there. Shoot. The moment had come.

She nodded in answer to Ginny's question, as did Luna. Ginny, Neville, and Harry all sat down. Meredith noticed that Harry seemed the most reluctant to sit next to her. He sat on the opposite bench, closest to the door.

Ginny put a book on Meredith's lap. "I finished reading it a while ago. Do you have the next one?"

_The Hobbit._ Meredith had totally forgotten she had lent it to Ginny the summer before. So _that_ was why she hadn't been able to find it among her books. "Yeah. One second." Meredith reached into her bag and pulled out _The Fellowship of the Ring_. She handed it to Ginny.

"Thanks."

"You're welcome." She went back to her book.

There was a long, awkward silence. Harry seemed to be avoiding her gaze. He was looking blankly at the floor of the compartment.

"If you want me to leave, Harry, all you have to do is ask," she said without looking up from her book.

Tension streamed through the air like static electricity on a dry, windy day.

Harry hesitated a moment before answering. "You can go if you want. Make friends with some of your fellow Slytherins. Or you could stay here, just as long as you don't turn this into a spy mission," Harry said coldly.

Meredith stared at him for another second before going back to her book. She didn't move for the next hour, not even when Neville's cactus exploded goo all over the place. (Ginny cleaned it up with a simple spell.) When she got hungry, Meredith munched on a green apple from her bag. When Neville, sitting across from her, offered her a chocolate frog, she turned it down politely. The real frog in his hand, his pet Trevor, had caused her appetite for frogs to vanish.

An hour into the journey, Ron and Hermione came and sat down, telling everyone about the new prefects. Soon after that, Draco Malfoy appeared in the doorway and started being rude to everyone, as usual.

"Shut up, Draco!" Meredith said when she couldn't stand his voice any longer.

"Oo-hoo! Look who it is! The Mudblood unknown who ran off for no apparent reason after the last task of the Triwizard tournament. And the name's Malfoy, if you don't mind, or I'll give you detention. It's easier to give someone in your own house detention than it is to give detention to people in other houses, you know."

She glared at him. "I'll call you Malfoy if you call me Snape, which I'm not going to let you, _cousin_."

His smile turned into a sneer. "So you're the girl my mother has been talking about. My cousin. Professor Snape's daughter?"

"Pretty much. Now go away before I send a letter to your mother telling her that you were mean to my friends and me."

Draco left.

"He's your _cousin_?" Harry said. "Merlin help us."

"He may be my cousin, but he certainly isn't my friend. Isn't your cousin a gangster, Harry? Are you _his_ friend? Are you _my _friend now? Have you had enough time to cool off and learn that just because I'm related to all these people doesn't mean I'm like them?"

"Know what? You're more like them than you think! Get out!"

"I will." She picked up her bag and book, and strode toward the door. Halfway out, she turned back and said to Harry, "Dumbledore wanted us to be friends, Harry. That's why he took you to my house in the first place. And now that I think about it, I am a little like my relatives. But you wouldn't know how, since you didn't spend the summer living with one of them." She turned on her heel and walked down the corridor.

"That was _rude_, Harry," she heard Hermione say. It had been rude. Harry had a tendency to be moody and explode at the slightest spark. Come to think of it, maybe Meredith was a little like that too.

She leaned against the corridor wall, watching the rain outside. Two years in a row, it was raining on September first. Was it a bad omen that what happened last year would happen this year, only worse?

Meredith pulled her wand and her broken fife out of her pocket. "_Reparo_," she said after clearing her mind, but the pieces of the fife did not jump back into place. She had tried it the year before at Hogwarts as well. It had never worked. She knew her magic worked, because she could repair other things, and it had always worked on those things. Maybe Muggle things couldn't be fixed with magic?

She put the fife back in her pocket and pulled out a small envelope. She opened it and looked at the photograph of her mother and father. Why did her father never at least attempt to smile nowadays?

"Hey," a voice behind Meredith made her jump. She whirled around.

"Oh. Hi, Neville," she said, quickly hiding the photograph in her pocket again, and looking out the window.

"Are you depressed again?" Neville asked. "Harry really shouldn't have yelled at you."

"It's fine." She sighed. "I don't know what I'm going to do this year, Neville. I can't make friends with anyone in Slytherin unless I'm like them, which I'm not. Maybe I shouldn't have switched houses."

Neville didn't say anything for a moment. Then he pulled something out of his pocket with the hand that wasn't holding Trevor the toad.

"I saw this in Diagon Alley and remembered how you couldn't fix your other one." He handed Meredith a wooden fife similar to the broken one in her pocket. "Gran looked at me funny when I told her why I wanted to get it, but she still let me." He laughed a little.

Meredith rolled the fife over in her hands. "Thanks," she said. "I didn't get you anything for your birthday. I'm sorry." She frowned.

"Play a song. That can be my present."

"What kind of song? Jig? Sad? Happy? Short? Long? Movie theme?"

"Whatever kind."

So Meredith put the fife to her lips and played a scale just to make sure this fife was the same as her old one. It was. She played the first real song she had learned, a sad one.

When she had finished, Neville clapped and a few people were poking their heads out of compartments. "Thanks," Meredith told Neville again. "This one plays a lot better than my old one." She smiled at him.

"You're welcome. What was that song?"

"It's a Muggle tune. Not mainstream pop, so you probably haven't heard of it. In America, we were all huge nerds of this kind of music. One of us heard that song and it sort of became our group theme song. We were a little different than everyone else, because they all listened to rock and metal."

"Cool. Listen, do you want to go back?" He pointed to the compartment. "You're not in exile, you know. Harry just blew up. Hey, look at me." Meredith did. "Your eyes…"

"Blue and red makes purple." She looked away, frowning.

"I think they look nice."

She managed a smile. "Thanks."

"So, coming back?"

"No. I think I'll go meet people."

Just then, some Hufflepuffs poked out of a compartment a few doors down. "Hey, flute girl! Come over here!" a girl called.

Meredith looked back at Neville. "I guess I'll be going then."

"Do you want you trunk?"

She patted her backpack. "Undetectable extension charm. I did it last year. Everything I own is in this backpack. Well, bye, then." She headed towards the Hufflepuffs' compartment, fife still in hand.

"Er, bye," Neville said. He walked back to the compartment he had come out of, then turned back. "Meredith, we're still friends, right?"

"Of course we are, Neville. Why wouldn't we be?" She went into the compartment.

The Hufflepuffs recoiled a little when they saw the green and silver on Meredith's robes instead of the red and gold they had obviously been expecting. "Slytherin?" the girl asked. "I thought you were in Gryffindor."

"I was. I switched."

"Oh. Well, I'm Hannah Abbot." Hannah flipped her blonde ponytail over her shoulder. "Who are you?"

"Meredith."

"Meredith who?"

Meredith swallowed. This was the deciding moment, the moment they could choose to kick her out of the compartment and never talk to her again. "Meredith Snape."

A few of the Hufflepuffs gasped, and most of them looked at her with widened eyes. "You aren't…_his_ daughter, are you?" a boy with blond hair and freckles asked.

Meredith nodded.

"And…Wait, do we have the right Snape? _Professor_ Snape?"

Meredith nodded again.

"And you're his daughter?"

Just smile and nod, smile and nod.

"Wicked."

_Defyyying graaavity,_ Meredith sang in her head.

"Is it weird?" the same boy asked. "I'm Ernie Macmillan, by the way. So, did you, well, _live_ with him this summer?"

Nod again.

"That's so…I don't know."

"Yeah, it was a little...unsettling at first, but after a week you get used to it."

The Hufflepuffs seemed eager to get away from this topic. "Did you know Cedric? Cedric Diggory?" Ernie asked.

Of course they would ask about Cedric. She had supposedly been there to see him die. "I only knew him a little." She swallowed. "He was dead before I got to the graveyard where You-Know-Who killed him."

"So you didn't see him die."

"I didn't see him die."

Remembering Cedric, they were all off a sudden very sad. In an attempt to lighten the mood, Hannah asked Meredith, "So when did you learn to play that?" indicating the fife.

"I taught myself the summer I was twelve. This was how we all got into Celtic-style music." She paused. "You guys don't hate me, do you? For being Professor Snape's daughter and a Slytherin?"

"Why would we be? You're not your dad. You don't even seem like a Slytherin. We Hufflepuffs are chosen for our sense of right and wrong. It's right to be fair. It's wrong to treat someone badly just because their father is mean to you. Simple as that."

Gee, someone should tell that to Harry and the Gryffindors. They might be brave and strong, but strength isn't everything.

Next, the rest of the Hufflepuffs introduced themselves. Ernie asked if Meredith was American. Meredith told her story from beginning to the present, putting her father in good light by saying that he sent her to America to be safe from You-Know-Who, not because he didn't want her. Meredith played a few more tunes on her new fife at her friends' requests. They told stories and she laughed with them.

The rest of the train ride went by much more smoothly than the first hour had, and Meredith didn't pick up her book again the whole way to Hogsmeade Station.

When the train stopped, Meredith pulled her waterproof cloak out of her bag and put it on. She held her bag in front of her, put on her hood, and stepped into the rain. She got into a horseless carriage (which she figured _must_ have a motor somewhere) with the Hufflepuffs. During the carriage ride, she pulled a Sharpie out of her bag and wrote her initials on the top flap. Magic bags were awesome, and she definitely wanted to keep this one.

At the castle, they all set their bags and purses in the entrance hall. Meredith rolled up her cloak inside out and stuffed it in her bag, far away from her books. In the Great Hall, she said goodbye to her new friends and glumly went to sit at the Slytherin table.

A few yards away, on the other side of the table, she saw her cousin Draco sit down next to his bodyguard friends and a girl with shoulder-length straight black hair. In her peripheral vision, Meredith saw Draco glance and nod in her direction while speaking to the girl, who looked over her shoulder at Meredith.

Meredith looked at the girl, and the girl quickly looked away. Meredith knew that Draco had been talking about her. And it probably wasn't good.

She was sitting at the edge of a group of second-years, some of which she recognized from last year's Sorting. They began to converse more quietly when she arrived. _Probably think I'm a lunatic because I ran off after the third task_, she thought.

To Meredith's surprise, Harry was being treated oddly as well. She saw his old Gryffindor pals grow silent when they saw him sit down. _Ha! Serves him right_, she thought. Then she realized how mean and Slytherin-like she was being. Harry needed friends as much as she did. Luckily they had both kept some old ones.

Were her friends in America still her friends? She wondered. Had they forgotten her _now_, after she had been gone for a whole year with almost no communication? Meredith pushed the thoughts out of her head.

After the Sorting, food appeared on the golden plates and everyone began to eat. Meredith found that she still had almost no appetite.

She looked over to the Gryffindor table and her eyes met Neville's. _You okay? _ he mouthed.

Meredith made a face and looked at all the Slytherins around her. She shook her head.

_I'm sorry._ And that was the end of their short conversation at the dinner table. If Meredith had been in Gryffindor still, she was sure the conversation would have lasted much longer. She talked to nobody else.

After the feast, Dumbledore stood at his owl podium and spoke to all the students. "Well, now that we are all digesting another magnificent feast, I beg a few moments of your attention to the usual start-of-term notices. First years ought to know that the forest in the grounds is out of bounds to students—and a few of our older students ought to know that by now. Mr. Filch, the caretaker, has asked me, for what he tells me is the four hundred and sixty second time, to remind you all that magic is not permitted in corridors between classes, nor are a number of other things, all of which can be checked on the extensive list now fastened to Mr. Filch's office door.

"We have had two changes in staffing this year." Meredith noticed that Hagrid was gone and there was an abnormally-happy-looking woman in all pink sitting at the teachers' table. "We are very pleased to welcome back Professor Grubbly-Plank"—what kind of a name was _that_?—"who will be taking Care of Magical Creatures lessons; we are also delighted to introduce Professor Umbridge, our new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher."

So this Umbridge woman had gotten the job when her father hadn't. Meredith knew he had really wanted to teach that class.

Before Dumbledore could finish another sentence, the woman in pink, Professor Umbridge, stood up and gave a little annoying cough. Dumbledore looked a bit stunned that someone would dare interrupt the Alpha Dumbledore. Alpha Albus, Meredith thought, managing to clear away some of the dark clouds above her head. She kept her face emotionless, though; people would think she was weird if she smiled or laughed when Alpha Albus had just been interrupted. Not that people didn't think she was weird already.

"Thank you, Headmaster, for those kind words of welcome," Professor Umbridge said in a high, little-girlish voice. Her voice became even more annoying as she went on, so all Meredith could do was cringe at the horrible sound.

By the end of Umbridge's speech, Meredith had taken in none of what the professor had said. She wondered how in the world she was going to survive hour-long lectures in class. Well, that was where her father's book could help her. She wished she had brought it into the Great Hall with her to read during Umbridge's boring oration.

Meredith only noticed that the speech had ended because Dumbledore and a few other people were clapping. Meredith sat with her eyes unfocused. Why couldn't this lady have switched places with her father, teaching potions, which Meredith already knew so much about?

When everyone else started getting up to leave, Meredith did so also. She glanced at her father sitting at the teachers' table, and left the Great Hall.

The Slytherin prefects, Draco and the girl he had been talking to, were herding the first years, leading the way to the Slytherin common room. They weren't doing it very well, or very nicely for that matter. Meredith followed them, making a mental note to mark the Slytherin common room on the map she had been given at the start of last school year.

To Meredith's surprise, they did not go upstairs to a tower; they went downstairs toward the dungeons. Meredith had thought every one of the Houses had a tower in a different corner of the castle.

The prefects said the password, and they all went through a secret door in a solid stone wall.

The Slytherin common room was gloomy compared to the Gryffindor common room. Banners on the walls were all green and silver, the Slytherin colors, with a snake emblem on them. Everywhere—on the furniture, on the walls, carved into the stonework—were snake symbols, their eyes shining emeralds. It creeped Meredith out a little bit, having them all watching her like that, and she shivered despite the heat coming from the roaring fireplace. Not for the first time, Meredith wondered _why ever_ she had volunteered to switch into Slytherin.

She followed a group of girls down some stairs to a grey stone hallway, and found her way to a door marked "Fifth Years."

The room had no windows. It was made of grey stone like the rest of the Slytherin dungeon, but this room was much colder than the common room. There were six beds lined up against three walls. No, seven. There was one squeezed into the corner with a tiny wardrobe squished between it and the dresser next to another bed. Meredith guessed that this spot was hers. Sure enough, her bag was sitting on the bed.

She unpacked her school clothes and packed her second backpack for classes the next morning. A few girls came and went, but paid no attention to Meredith.

Once she had unpacked, Meredith grabbed her pajamas, changed in the bathroom at the end of the hallway, and climbed into bed, closing the Slytherin-green curtains to shut out the world.

This was the time of night when Meredith would normally have written in her diary. She didn't tonight, because she wanted to try to sleep and be well rested the next day. She wouldn't go running with her group early tomorrow. Once she was sure she would be able to find her way back to the Slytherin dungeon, she would start going for runs. Her and whoever was still enough of her friend to come with.

She thought about everything there was to think about, trying to see the why of things from others' perspectives.

Harry was mean to her because Professor Snape was mean to him. (The more she thought about it, the more she regretted snapping at Harry on the train.) Professor Snape was mean to Harry because Harry's dad had been mean to _him_ when they were in school. Grudges were held for a long time in the wizarding world, weren't they? Peace needed to be made soon, at least between her and Harry.

Draco was mean to her because he was mean to everyone. But why was he mean to everyone? He probably took after his father, Meredith's uncle Lucius. He had been mean to the Weasleys at the Quidditch World Cup. Was there anyone in Slytherin like Meredith?

Next person: Neville. Neville was kind to her because they had been friends all the previous year, long enough that Neville knew Meredith wasn't like her father at all. She still hadn't found out what bothered him so much about the Cruciatus Curse. Sure, it had been absolutely terrible to watch, but Neville had had more of a reaction than anyone else in the class when Professor Moody did the Curse on a spider. Come to think about it, Meredith barely knew Neville at all.

She barely knew her own father. She barely knew anyone else. Luckily, most people here could be read very easily, and nobody noticed if they were being eavesdropped on. She would be more observant tomorrow, and from then on.


	9. No, I Cannot Raise Your Potions Grade

Chapter Nine: No, I Cannot Raise Your Potions Grade

_Monday, September 3, 2012 11:27 PM_

_The torture has begun. Figuratively, of course. This morning McGonagall handed out schedules as usual. Herbology was first. With Ravenclaw. Prof. Sprout (and all of the rest of the teachers, I guess) are psyched that this year is OWL year, the year we take the test that is the reason why we go to school in the first place. It's CST month all over again, but for a whole year! It's gonna suck. I thought I'd escaped those types of tests. Guess not. So after Sprout's half hour rant about how important the test is, we got to pot some plants. The ones that move on their own don't freak me out so much anymore. Meeting Voldemort twice really puts things in a different perspective. After Herbology was double potions with Dad and the Gryffindors. I think the reason everyone messed up on the Draught of Peace is because they didn't read all the directions through first. That was the first thing Dad taught me in remedials last year: always read the directions through first. I think I did pretty well on that potion. It was the right color. I think I might've stirred 7 ½ times instead of 7 on step ten, though. Dad's speech before class about OWLs was short, but I could tell he was mocking some people, like Neville and Harry. I hate it when he goes all stern like that, but I know he's got an impression to keep up. It's okay, I guess. Just not the part about him making fun of Neville and Harry. _

_I ate lunch really fast and headed to the library to read more and get started on homework. _

_People are getting annoying. Now that the whole school's had all summer to think and stew and boil, they've decided to either suck up to me in hopes that I'll convince Dad to give them a good grade, or they ignore me completely, or they whisper about me behind my back and are mean about it. Mostly first through third years do the first. Gryffindors and Ravenclaws of all ages do both. Mostly Slytherins do the last. At least five of them came up to me during breakfast, and at least five more while I was walking to the library. I have to say "No, I can't convince my dad to give you an 'O' in potions" a lot. _

_So I'm sitting in the library waiting for the bell to ring and end lunch, and this girl, Cho Chang, Ravenclaw, girlfriend of Cedric Diggory before he died, comes up to me and sits down in the chair opposite me. And I'm all like, shoot, she's coming to chew me out and blame me for Cedric's death, because everyone knows Harry didn't do it and there's no evidence that You-Know-Who is back. But she didn't look angry. She looked kinda sad. (Ten points for Meredith House! I am being observant!) I don't know what the heck she's doing here so I say, as I've said a million times today, "No, I can't get my dad to give you an 'O' in potions."_

_Cho Chang: "Actually, I didn't come to ask about that. I came to ask if you knew anything about how Cedric… I'm Cho Chang, by the way."_

_Me: "Meredith Snape." Wow. She didn't even flinch. Of course, my last name shouldn't be a surprise to many. So I told her about how I wasn't there when Cedric died, but I did see the Dark Lord. (I used that exact pair of words. I think I'm picking stuff up from my father.) So she says thanks for the info and gets up, obviously glad that she doesn't have to blame me for Cedric's death._

_Cho: "Have people asked you about raising their potions grades a lot today?"_

_Me: "You wouldn't believe how many times."_

_We talked on our way to History of Magic, which we both have right after lunch on Mondays. Mostly we talked about quidditch and who is winning the series. I haven't been really keeping up on quidditch scores or teams. _

_It feels weird to talk to people like nothing has ever happened when in reality you have the Dark Mark on your arm and they're so anti-Voldemort. Why did I get myself involved in this stupid Dark stuff? _

_Anyway, I guess I've made another new friend. Ten points again._

_H.O.M. was boring as ever. Boring even in comparison to my third grade science teacher, who didn't let us do anything but worksheets. Fifth graders got to make bottle rockets that year, and we were sooo jealous. _

_D.A.D.A. (short for Defense Against the Dark Arts from now on) was weird. I find myself still cringing whenever Umbridge talks. Squeaky squeaky. Annoying. Girly toad, but __harsh__. At the beginning of class, some Gryffindors were making a paper crane fly through the air with a levitating charm, and then Umbridge comes in. Poof. __Bird incinerated__. Umbridge smiles way too much. Ha ha. Except when she's yelling at Harry Potter to shut up about Voldemort coming back because "This…is…a…__lie__." Harry got detention for talking back. Umbridge turned almost as pink as her fluffy cardigan. So, in D.A.D.A. we're not going to be using defensive spells because the Ministry of Magic is stupid and won't admit that freaking Voldemort is back. I guess wizarding politics are just as screwed up as Muggle ones._

_The textbook for that class (the only one I didn't touch all summer because the cover looked stupid and I had Dad's book) is soooo boring. The only reason I didn't fall asleep in that class today was because Umbridge was constantly yelling. I officially hate that class._

_I had a lot of homework, so that's why I'm up so late. I finished the potions essay (12 inches about the properties of moonstone and its uses in potion making. It was pretty easy because Dad and I spent a whole hour talking about moonstone last year in remedial potions. I just had to organize what I remember.) I've started and I'm about half way done with the history essay. I need more info, so I'll go to the library tomorrow._

_This is going to be an interesting year. Either that, or it's going to be really boring and I'll burn out from all the essays sometime next week. I'm tired. I'll go to sleep now._

**Note not from Meredith's diary: CST is the California Standardized Test. Teachers majorly freak out about it the week before.**


	10. Sad Stories

**This chapter contains a two-sentence quote from Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, the film. I do not own those two sentences. Also, I just figured out how to do the horizontal line thing since asterisks don't work here. I wish I'd known about this earlier.**

Chapter Ten: Sad Stories

Meredith had a mountain of homework to keep her occupied most of the time. The teachers assigned essays and papers at least twelve inches long daily. Meredith knew she could write bigger and be done in less time, but she, unlike some other students, actually _wanted_ to learn.

The running group started meeting again a week after the start of term. A few younger Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs joined Meredith and Neville. There were no other Gryffindors or Slytherins.

It was annoying to have to wear long sleeves all the time, especially while running. Meredith had to repeatedly stop herself from rolling up her sleeves while running. If people knew she had the Dark Mark on her left arm, she could be expelled, or even sent to Azkaban. She needed to be very careful.

Umbridge was taking over the entire school. She had been made "Hogwarts High Inquisitor" by the Minister of Magic and now she interviewed and audited teachers every day. Meredith watched her father being interviewed in Potions; it was quite hilarious. Umbridge asked the stupidest questions, like, "You applied for the position of Defense Against the Dark Arts, but you were unsuccessful?"

"_Obviously_." Meredith had to snigger. Harry and Ron got whacked on the back of the head with a roll of parchment afterward for laughing.

Trelawney made the dumbest prediction when Umbridge requested one: that Umbridge was in _grave danger!_ So cliché. She was sure to get fired.

Every day in Defense Against the Dark Arts, all the class did was read the book and copy information. It was all pure factoids, in Meredith's opinion. She didn't take out her _real_ Defense Against the Dark Arts book in class, fearing that it would be confiscated and she would get in trouble. Then her dad would get in trouble and it would all be one huge Ministry mess, perhaps with the dementors of Azkaban involved.

Every Saturday, Meredith went to the library to study with her friends. Sometimes it was with Justin and Hannah and Ernie, other times it was with Neville. She helped him with Potions and he helped her with Herbology, just like the year before. It was almost as if nothing had happened.

In early October, Meredith was studying in the library with Neville when she felt so cooped up she couldn't stand it anymore. "Let's go outside," she suggested, packing up her books and stuffing them into her bag. "It's boring here. And hadn't you said you wanted to look for a special plant in the lake?"

"Well, yeah—"

"Then you can check it out right now. Come on." They went out of the castle onto the grounds and stopped at the shore of the lake. Meredith found that most of the flowers she had created the previous year were still here.

It felt good to be out in the fresh air. Morning runs weren't enough. All summer, she had been isolated in a smoggy abandoned town, and so far this year, all she had done was run and study.

They finished doing homework much more quickly than Meredith thought they could have in the library. Neville went right away to the lakeside, took off his shoes and socks, rolled up his pants, and waded in. Meredith created a few butterflies and a few flowers, then climbed the tree she had been leaning against and started to read. She leaned her back against the trunk and stretched out her legs on a wide, sturdy branch. She was at a very interesting part in the Defense Against the Dark Arts book: a long section about grindylows.

"Hey, Meredith?" Neville called.

"Hmm?"

"Oh. You're up there. Well, um, can I ask you something?"

"Sure, Neville. What?"

"If you were, say, forming a secret organization under Umbridge's nose, where would you hold meetings?"

"The common room?"

"Too public."

"Um, I don't know. Are there any empty parts of the castle? Why do you ask?"

"I don't know. Never mind."

He was lying and she could tell. Meredith hopped out of the tree, took of her shoes and socks, rolled up her jeans, and waded into the lake. The water was freezing cold; it immediately numbed her feet.

"If Harry's doing something rebellious against Umbridge, I want to know about it," she said in a whisper, pretending to examine the green slime Neville was holding. "I want to join."

"Alright. But you can't tell anyone. Harry formed this secret Defense Against the Dark Arts group called Dumbledore's Army."

"Dumbledore's Army?"

"It's what the Ministry fears most, isn't it? So, anyway, since Professor Umbridge won't teach us anything useful, he's going to teach us because he's had real experience dealing with the Dark Arts."

"And that's what you need a meeting place for?"

"Yeah."

She nodded and paused, remembering newly-announced Educational Decree Number 24: no student clubs or organizations can exist without Umbridge knowing, and if they did, the members could be expelled. "But you'll all get expelled if—"

"We know. Do you still want to join?" Neville plunked his hand back into the water, splashing Meredith.

"Yes, but I won't be signing a contract or anything." She splashed Neville back.

"You'll have to talk to Hermione then." He splashed a handful of water at her, beginning a water fight, which they both came out of soaked.

Meredith, having slipped in the mud, was wringing out her hair when Neville asked her, "Why do you always wear long sleeves?"

It was a logical question. Meredith always _always_ wore long sleeves, even on the hottest of days. She preferred black because white could be seen through. Today, even though it was warm for October, she was wearing a long sleeved plain black shirt. It was too warm to wear robes over her clothes. Thinking quickly, she answered Neville's question, "No reason. I'm just cold a lot. You know, the vampire thing."

Neville just looked at her. "Do I want to know the real answer?" He was frowning now.

"You might be a little angry."

"Tell me anyway. A secret for a secret. You start."

"Alright. But you have to promise not to tell _anyone,_ okay?" Neville nodded.

Meredith looked around to see if there was anyone in sight. Then she rolled up her left sleeve just enough so part of the snake could be seen moving on her skin. She quickly pulled her sleeve back down and pretended nothing had happened.

The air was getting colder and the wind was picking up. Meredith shivered. It didn't help that Neville was staring her down. "A secret for a secret," she reminded him as he turned to walk away. Neville turned back, crossing his arms.

"Fourteen years ago," he began, "a _Death Eater_ named Bellatrix Lestrange used the Cruciatus Curse on my parents. She tortured them for information, but they wouldn't give it to her. They both went mad and are still in St. Mungo's." He turned around again, grabbed his bag, and walked away.

Meredith didn't have the heart to call him back. She didn't know what to say. Her aunt Bellatrix had driven Neville's parents insane, and that was just the shameful truth of it. That was why he lived with his grandmother. That was why he had been so out of it after Moody showed them the Cruciatus Curse on a spider. Meredith felt horrible and so ashamed to be related to all of these terrible people. She should have gone back to the Muggle world when she had the chance.

Meredith was Professor Snape's daughter. She was hated by Harry Potter and many more. She had the Dark Mark on her left arm. Nobody except maybe her father truly trusted her, and the only person who had trusted her enough to be her friend had just walked away.

_I never should've shown him the Mark_, Meredith thought. _I knew he would flip. Why did I show him anyway?_

_ Because I trusted him._

_ Meredith, you stupid idiot daughter-of-an-evil-teacher! When will you learn that you can't trust anyone anymore? Harry already blabbed your secrets, so why do you still go telling people other ones? Now you have almost no friends and definitely no BFFs. Smooth. Minus fifty—no, one hundred—no, five hundred points._

Meredith sat down with her back to the tree and repeatedly bashed her head against the trunk. _Meredith, you're a stupid—ow!—idiot—ow!—nerd—ow!—bigmouth—ow!—chicken—ow!..._

* * *

They continued to run in the running group during the next week. Neville and Meredith both tried to act normal. People say that secrets don't make friends, meaning that _kept_ secrets don't get you anywhere. Just goes to show, in some cases, _told_ secrets don't make friends either.

The problem for Neville was that he had already told Meredith about Dumbledore's Army, which meant if they weren't friends, she could get them all into serious trouble with Umbridge if she wanted to.

But Meredith didn't intend to tell anyone any more secrets ever _ever_. If people thought they couldn't trust her, then she wouldn't trust them either.

Meredith noticed during the next week that Neville was much more formal and stuff to her. (She gave herself ten points for being observant.) Most of the time, she volunteered to take up the rear of the group and keep the stragglers going, just so she could watch Neville, or, at least, the back of his head. It was easy to see over the heads of all the younger students. They were like little ducklings all in a line; it was a tiny bit amusing.

Educational Decree Number 24 didn't apply to the running group until one morning a week after her fall-out with Neville when Umbridge found out about the running club.

As they reached the front castle doors, they jogged up the steps and who should be waiting for them at the top but Professor Umbridge herself.

_Shoot,_ Meredith thought. She put on a cheery face. "Good morning, Professor Umbridge."

"Good morning. Might I ask for your name?"

"Meredith Snape."

"And, Meredith, are you aware that all student organizations are disbanded under Educational Decree Number 24, unless approved by me?"

"Yes, Professor."

"Then what is the meaning of all this?"

"This is my running group. I never really considered it a club, just a group of friends."

"Quite a large group of friends. What do you run for?"

"Well, for exercise, I guess. That's all." She thought quickly. She could get her father into trouble if she didn't play Umbridge's game right. Umbridge had already put a few teachers on probation, and Meredith didn't want the same to happen to her father. She added, "If you would consider this a student organization, I can just disband it here and now."

"I would very much appreciate that. Thank you for being so compliant. Have a good day, children." Umbridge went back into the castle. Meredith made a face at her as soon as Umbridge's back was turned. People had given Umbridge a rude nickname, replacing the last six letters of her name with a bad word. Rightfully so. Umbridge truly was a you-know-what.

When Professor Umbridge was out of earshot, Neville said to Meredith, "Why did you do that? What are we going to do now? We have to keep running! How did that old hag find out about this anyway?"

"One: I don't want my dad to get in trouble for my defiance; he could get sacked. Two: we'll gather in the common rooms, one separate group for each house. I know we have to keep running. Three: I have no idea how she found out, but I'm guessing she has spies somewhere. Let's just go inside."

The next morning, Meredith woke up early as usual, dressed, and went up the stairs into the common room. She was about to go outside to run on her own (because one person wasn't a club) when a deep, slow voice behind her made her jump.

"_Sneaking…out_?"

Meredith turned around quickly, expecting to see Draco standing there with a tape playing to scare her. But nobody was there. "Hello?" she called. The room was only dimly lit by small slits in the ceiling that let lake-light come in. It wasn't surprising that Slytherin dungeon was so isolated it was located under the lake.

"I said," whoever was there was behind her again, "sneaking…out?" Meredith came face-to-face with a tall, menacing, ghost with shackles on his transparent ankles.

"I— I— It doesn't count a-as sneaking out, does it? I mean— it's morning. Um, who are you?"

The ghost floated away and sat in a chair by the fireplace. "The Bloody Baron is what they call me."

Meredith saw bright silver spots on the front of the Baron's old-fashioned robes. If they were what she thought… She considered running back to her dormitory to hide, but didn't.

"Did you…kill someone?"

"Yes. A woman who, as it happens, looks very much like _you_."

Meredith bolted and ran. _Creepy ghost, creepy ghost, get away from the creepy ghost,_ she thought, skipping the last five steps of stairs leading down to the dormitories. The stone floor hurt her feet, but she kept going until she had shut the door of her dormitory.

She sat on her bed and thought. Had the Baron really killed someone a long time ago, or did he mean that he was going to kill _her_? She suddenly realized exactly what the silver stains on the ghost's robes were: blood. Well, duh. He was called the _Bloody_ Baron. Still, it was a little creepy. Maybe more than just a little.

Perhaps the Baron—what was he the Baron of?—_had_ killed somebody who looked like her. Would the girl be a ghost? Again, Meredith promised herself to be more observant in the future.

She took a long shower and packed her backpack for the day.

For the next week, Meredith was very cautious when she went into the common room to get outside. If the Bloody Baron was there, she would skip her run and sit in bed writing in her diary. When she felt like it, she wandered around the castle ghost-hunting, searching for a lady who looked like she did. After almost getting caught a few times, she discovered that bare feet were quieter on the stone floor than Converse were.

Anybody who found her would think she was a lunatic, but Meredith had a plan to prevent that. If someone found her and she wasn't able to hide in time, she would close her eyes and pretend to be sleepwalking. The trick was to show no emotion or awareness.

A week later, she found the ghost. Wandering around on the stairs that led to Ravenclaw Tower, she saw something move out of the corner of her eye. She ducked behind a pillar near a stained-glass window and waited, completely silent, heart thumping, hoping it wasn't Umbridge.

The ghost was a tall, thin young woman with long dark curly hair and a gown that reached her toes. She was gliding down the stairs.

"Hey," Meredith said, not too loudly but not too softly.

The ghost whirled around and saw her. Meredith almost fell over; the woman looked just like Meredith herself could look in five or ten years. "Who might you be?" the lady asked slowly.

"I'm Meredith."

"Are you a friend of Luna's? Has she sent you to find me?"

"Yes, I'm Luna's friend, but she didn't tell me to come find you." Why _had_ she come looking for the ghost that looked like her? "What is your name?"

"Helena Ravenclaw. They call me the Grey Lady, the ghost of Ravenclaw tower. If you'll excuse me, I prefer not to talk right now." She glided through the wall.

Meredith went back to the Slytherin common room. When she got there, the Bloody Baron was sitting on a chair in plain sight. "You found her?" he said.

"Yes," Meredith answered. She sat in a chair opposite the Baron despite her lingering fear. "You killed her?"

"Yes. And I still suffer it." He pulled back the front of his robes to reveal a gaping dark hole over his heart. He lifted his feet and the chains on his ankles clinked and echoed in the empty room.

"Why did you do it?"

"I _will not tell you_." He stood up and flew up to the ceiling. "If you find her again, please tell her I am sorry," he said before disappearing through the stone roof.


	11. Alliances

Chapter Eleven: Alliances

Meredith ignored most of the new school rules because they didn't apply to her. No hanging out with two or more people. Zero wasn't more than two. Sometimes Meredith hung out with Hannah or Ernie or Cho, but Hannah and Ernie were always somewhere else with a group of happy Hufflepuffs, and Cho was always crying, it seemed. Meredith and Neville still weren't speaking, even though she was really starting to miss him.

No snogging in public. Meredith wasn't snogging anybody.

Boys and girls must not be within eight inches of each other. Every guy—ever person, in general, for that matter—was maintaining his distance, always a lot more than eight inches.

The High Inquisitor has the power to fire teachers. Trelawney was on probation, and would most likely get the sack pretty soon. As much as Meredith disliked Trelawney, she felt sorry for her.

There were countless other rules that echoed through pink speakers around the castle. No matter how many times she heard the rule about not wandering through the castle at night, Meredith still occasionally went for walks at midnight when she couldn't sleep. She continued her search for Helena Ravenclaw in the early mornings. She never had to use the sleepwalking trick.

On Halloween, Meredith went to all her classes and paid attention like a good girl, and finally became part of the rebellion.

Meredith sat down for the feast in her usual spot: halfway down the table, sitting on the bench with her back to the wall. She observed the room. Glowing jack-o-lanterns floated above the students' heads. The sky outside was dark and cloudy, a typical Halloween night. Neville would not be asking her how she was doing during this feast. He was sitting at the Gryffindor table with his back to her.

She ate in silence, the Bloody Baron sitting across from her. When Meredith had finished, the Baron spoke. "Have you found her again?" he asked in his normal, darkly toned voice. Meredith was getting used to it.

"No," she said. "I don't think she wants me to find her again. She didn't really want to talk the last time we met. She left very quickly." Meredith took a sip from her goblet. The red punch tasted a bit odd, almost metallic. What _was_ this stuff?

Whatever it was, it tasted good, so she kept drinking it. It seemed to satisfy a deep hunger inside of her that no normal food could. But at the same time, the taste was linked to a particular memory, a bad memory…

Meredith almost puked when she realized what was in the goblet. It was blood. She remembered accidentally biting her lip once and tasting the copper-iron flavor. That had been a long time ago, before she had even read the Harry Potter books.

What was this all about?! Who ran the kitchens and why had they put blood in her goblet? She wasn't completely a vampire! More importantly, who did the blood belong to?

That last question made her gag again. She needed to get to the kitchens as soon as possible. And to find out how to get there, she knew exactly who to ask.

At the end of the feast when all of the students were getting up out of their seats to go to their dormitories, Meredith jogged to catch up with the Gryffindors and poked Fred and George on the shoulders.

"Hey, can I talk to you guys for a second?" she asked.

They didn't answer, but followed her into a side corridor.

Meredith had never fully appreciated how tall the twins were compared to her. "Um…"

"Spit it out, Severusette. What do you want from us?" Fred asked.

Ignoring the name because she didn't know whether to take it as an insult or a complement or a joke, Meredith said, "I need to know how to get into the kitchens."

"Blood in your goblet, Severusette?" George said.

"Yeah. How'd you know?" George tapped the side of his mouth. Meredith wiped her own mouth with the sleeve of her robes.

"So you want into the kitchens—"

"To find out—"

"Why the kitchen staff—"

"Put blood in your goblet?" Switching speakers in the middle of sentences was an annoying habit of the twins'. Meredith only discovered this when she stopped viewing them as her brothers.

"Yeah. That's exactly it," she said, a little surprised that they guessed. She shouldn't have been surprised; it was Fred and George.

"Tell you what, Severusette: we'll help you if you help us."

"Go on."

"Well, seeing as this is our last year at Hogwarts, we'd like to make something of it. And since you're in Slytherin, and therefore automatically one of Umbridge's favorites, you might be able to help us with a few pranks."

She hesitated. "What's the risk on my part?"

"Getting in trouble with Umbridge, but we can ensure you won't get caught. No worries."

"Alright. Deal." They all shook hands. "Perfected the Puking Pastilles yet?"

They talked business for another half hour, debating possible pranks. Puking Pastilles were out because the whole school knew about them and the evidence would point directly back to Fred and George. They were concocting another so far failed sweet for the Skiving Snackboxes that it might be possible to use.

Meredith learned how to get to the kitchens, so right after she finished talking with Fred and George, she headed straight there. On her way downstairs to the entrance hall, Meredith took off her shoes so they wouldn't click on the stone floor. The floor got colder every day because winter was coming, but she didn't mind. The cold let her know she was awake, and it kept her awake.

She tickled the pear in the portrait on the wall, and a door behind the painting slowly opened up. Meredith walked into the kitchen and was greeted by the sight of about fifty little people with big ears and long noses, wearing hand towels draped around them like togas.

Meredith immediately stopped in her tracks to ask herself what these things were. They were obviously the castle servants, since they were hurriedly washing dishes from supper and putting them on four long tables identical to the House tables in the Great Hall.

Hermione had an organization last year called Society for the Promotion of Elfish Welfare; Meredith had coughed up the money Hermione wanted just to avoid more pestering about elfish slavery. So these were those elves. Meredith had expected them to be more human-like and dressed in green leaves.

One elf came up to Meredith. It had huge eyes and its ears perked straight up like a cat's from the sides of a million knitted hats piled high on the elf's head. It looked a little like Winky, the house elf she had seen at the Quidditch World Cup the year before. "Can Dobby help Miss with anything?"

"Yes, in fact. Um, who's Dobby?"

"I is, Miss." The elf puffed out its chest proudly.

"Okay. Um, well, I was wondering why there was blood in my cup instead of pumpkin juice at the feast tonight."

"Ah, yes! You is the girl with purple eyes! Not so purple now, Dobby sees. Dobby has heard much talk of Miss in Gryffindor tower!"

"Who's talking about me?"

"Harry Potter and his friends Master Weasley and Miss Hermione. They talk about Miss With Purple Eyes like she is a vampire girl. Dobby thinks this could have something to do with Harry Potter having strange dreams."

"He's been having strange dreams?"

"Yes, Miss. And is it true that Miss is a vampire girl? Dobby did not mean any harm with the false blood. Halloween is the night of many strange creatures. Dobby thought if Miss already had her thirst quenched, she would not be tempted to go hunt."

"So the blood was fake?"

"Yes, Miss."

"Whew. Good. Thank you, Dobby. If you could keep doing that periodically it would be great. When you see Harry next, tell him that I want to help him with the D.A."

"The D.A., Miss?"

"Yes. He'll know what I mean. Thank you. Goodnight." She departed the kitchens and padded quietly to Slytherin dungeon.

When she got to the dormitory, everyone was already in bed, so Meredith grabbed her clothes, set down her shoes, and went to the girls' lavatory at the end of the hall.

Meredith saw her reflection in the mirror and nearly screamed. She had been under the impression that drinking blood would make her eyes turn lighter, maybe gold or even back to their normal blue. Instead, they were a very dark red. _Stupid Twilight_, she thought. _It lied._

Hopefully the red would be gone by morning and everyone wouldn't think she was more of a freak than they already did. Harry knew she was half-vampire, so how many more people had he told? She didn't want to prove people's suspicions.

By morning, Meredith's eyes were almost back to normal. Her pupils still were a little dilated, though, and the irises were a little more prominently red. Blue specks dotted the light scarlet and made her eyes look a sparkling red from far away. In short, she looked like a vampire who had been hunting the night before.

She got ready for the day and went upstairs into the common room with some books to finish a Herbology essay. She wished Neville were here to help her with it. She wondered if he was struggling with the potions essay assigned on Monday. Judging by the clouds of grossly green fumes that had come off his cauldron that day in class, the answer to her question was yes. Did he miss her as much as she missed him? That was a whole different matter.

On the big table at one side of the room was a small box that Meredith was sure hadn't been there before. A note on the top had her name on it, so she opened it.

Inside were a gold Galleon and a folded piece of paper. Meredith read the note first. It said:

_Meredith,_

_I would like to apologize for the way I've treated you since the third task of the Triwizard Tournament. It was very wrong of me. You were right. Nobody should be judged because of who they're related to. Dumbledore wanted us to be on good terms, so we might as well sort out our differences and get along._

_You say you want to help the D.A.? You seem trustworthy enough, I guess. The Galleon in this box isn't real. The numbers around the edge change to say the time and date of the next meeting. We'll be in this place on the seventh floor. There will be a door on the wall that's usually blank across from the tapestry of Barnabas the Barmy training trolls for the ballet. If you have any materials such as books to help, please bring them. We already have a lot of books, and the room provides a lot of things, but if there's anything else, you can bring it._

_Thanks for understanding, and you'd better not rat us out._

_Harry_

_PS: Eat or burn this note once you've read it._

Meredith memorized the information and ripped up the note, throwing it into the fireplace and saying, "_Reducto_," which she had learned from her father's book. The note disintegrated to ashes and blended in with the remains of last night's fire.

She stayed in the common room writing the Herbology essay due that day, and finished more quickly than she thought she could. Being well rested had a whole lot to do with it. The only times she couldn't concentrate were when her thoughts drifted to the fake Galleon in the pocket of her robes.

By now she had quite a few important items on her person at all times. There was her mother's necklace, which she always wore. In her left pocket were her new fife and a small envelope with her parents' wedding photo in it. In the right pocket she kept her wand, a Muggle pen for jotting things down quickly, and the fake Galleon for the D.A. For Meredith, it felt necessary to have all these things about her. It was weird to go around without the familiar weight in her pockets.

People started coming out of the dormitories, dressed in the school uniform and rubbing their eyes sleepily. A group of fifth year girls that included Pansy Parkinson was giggling in a small football huddle. They came up the stairs from the dormitory and walked quickly into the common room, arms linked, grins wide. They walked right up to the table where Meredith was putting her books away.

"Hey," Pansy Parkinson said to Meredith, who looked up and said the same thing back. Pansy continued, "Look, Meredith, I think we got off on the wrong foot. We wanted to apologize for being so hostile just because you were in Gryffindor. Right, girls?" The group nodded vigorously.

Pansy grinned even wider. "But then we thought, who in their right mind would want to be friends with a poor, ugly, anti-social vampire girl with coping issues?"

This had gone from suspicious to bad in less than ten seconds. Meredith finished packing up and stood, smiling as if she didn't feel insulted at all. "You're right, Parkinson. But really, I didn't know you were a vampire girl too!"

Pansy's grin disappeared. "You'd better watch yourself, vampire girl," she sneered. "_I_ am a prefect, which means _I_ can give you detention or worse."

"And _I_ am a vampire girl, which means that _I_ might end up sucking your blood one night. That's why I came to the dorm late yesterday, didn't you know? Hunting in the forest. The eyes prove it. See? They haven't gone back to normal yet." She displayed a mostly red iris. "Oh. And add that I'm Professor Snape's daughter."

She walked away. She didn't care if Pansy Parkinson gave her detention. Her father had already received a good evaluation from the Ministry. She was a Slytherin, and everyone knew that Umbridge favored Slytherins. Anyway, Meredith doubted she would get detention after intimidating Pansy like that. It was actually kind of fun to be half vampire.

After Double Potions that day, Meredith's father asked her to stay after class for a moment. She complied and they went into his office. Meredith was expecting a telling-off for something she hadn't realized she had done wrong.

"So, how is your year going?" her father asked. His face changed from the hard classroom one to the soft but still unreadable expression he wore most often when Meredith was around.

"It's alright," Meredith said, fiddling with her necklace.

"Have you made any new friends this year? I always see you sitting alone at the Slytherin house table."

"Well, I've made friends with a few Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs, and a few of the Gryffindors are still my friends, but I haven't made any new friends in Slytherin. I just don't seem to fit in. They're all mean and I'm quiet and self-reliant."

Severus understood this. It had been _his_ story years back. "Do they tease you?"

Meredith laughed. "They tried to this morning. They called me an anti-social, ugly vampire girl that nobody could ever want to be friends with, so I told them that I was out hunting in the forest last night. They got sort of creeped out by my eyes, too."

"I am glad you are fending for yourself." Severus looked a tad bit alarmed. "_Were_ you hunting in the forest last night? It was Halloween, after all."

"No, I wasn't. The kitchen staff gave me a cup of fake blood with supper."

"And you are sure it was false?"

"Yes. Right after the feast I marched down there and asked them what the deal was, giving me blood to drink, and they said it was fake. It was really convincing, though, and that's why my eyes are all screwed up today."

"I see. And the…?" He tapped his left forearm.

"It's okay. It still stings a little and at first it was a bit of a hassle to always wear long sleeves." She wanted to tell him about Neville's reaction when she had showed him, but didn't feel that this was the right time. "It's alright now. How has your year been, Dad?"

"Same as ever. Now, go have lunch."

"Okay." As Meredith turned to leave, she heard her father whisper, "_Pop quiz!_"

She was ready. Meredith sealed off her mind tightly, bolting doors closed and shutting the keys inside them. Her father's consciousness was caught by surprise at its unsuccessful attack, so Meredith fought back while she had the chance.

A tall man with a hooked nose was yelling down at a woman while a small, dark-haired boy cried in a corner nearby; the Sorting Hat was being placed on the head of a skinny boy with long black hair and a pale face; "I don't need your help, you filthy Mudblood!" a teenage version of the same boy yelled; "Don't lie to me, Severus. I know that the girl survived, even if Talitha did not," Dumbledore said.

Meredith was sitting against the wall of her father's office. She didn't remember falling to the floor.

"I— I'm sorry…"

"It was my fault. I underestimated you. Leave."

Meredith did as she was told.

She had never realized how bad her father's childhood had been. Believing that her father had ever been a child was difficult and strange enough. She felt bad for breaking into his mind, but at the same time it gave her a new perspective. Obviously, her grandparents had fought a lot, and eventually that led to her grandfather leaving the family. Her father had been mixed up in the whole issue of blood purity, even though he himself was a half-blood. And the fourth memory…

He had blatantly lied to Dumbledore and said that she, Meredith, had not survived beyond a few days of life. He had blatantly lied to _Dumbledore_. He had said that she was _dead_, all so he wouldn't have to deal with a kid.

And maybe to protect her from Voldemort too. The Dark Lord targeted the loved ones of people he needed to get at. Harry Potter was living proof of that. Perhaps it was a good thing that Meredith had been sent away. Otherwise she could have ended up as dinner for Nagini. She still could end up as dinner for Nagini.

Meredith was now confused. She didn't know her father's true motives, nor had she ever, and she didn't have a friend close enough to tell about this. Boy, she really missed Neville now.


	12. The Lion and the Serpent

Chapter Twelve: The Lion and the Serpent

In early November, it became too cold for Meredith to wander around the castle barefoot, so she did homework in the common room instead. The mornings were a convenient time to work. There was nobody in the common room, except the Baron on occasions, and the whole castle was quiet because everyone was still asleep.

That week there were no D.A. meetings because Gryffindors had quidditch practice every day to beat Slytherin at the match on Saturday. Meredith would be secretly rooting for Gryffindor because, quite frankly, she didn't think her own house deserved to win. She hadn't had any trouble with Pansy Parkinson's group of friends since she told them about hunting, but she knew they still talked about her behind her back. Oh well. That didn't matter.

Meredith was still confused about her father's memories, and she thought about it whenever she had time. That was mostly on mornings when she didn't have homework, and Saturday afternoons when she wandered by the edge of the forest and sat at the lakeshore. Meredith really needed someone to talk to now. It would be a bit awkward discussing these things with her father because she knew it reminded him of his terrible, regrettable past.

Meredith made up her mind to find Neville at the quidditch match and apologize.

On the morning of the game, Meredith dressed in normal warm Slytherin garb because it was cold outside and she didn't want to draw unnecessary attention to herself by being the only Slytherin supporting Gryffindor.

At breakfast, Meredith was handed a crown-shaped badge and a small slip of parchment. The pin said "Weasley Is Our King," which couldn't mean anything good. Sure enough, when she opened the note she found the lyrics to a song, also entitled "Weasley Is Our King," with rude lyrics insulting Ron, his family, and his poor quidditch skills. On her way out to the quidditch pitch, Meredith threw both the badge and the song into a waste bin.

It was colder outside than she had expected; there was a thick layer of frost on the ground that crunched underfoot, and her breath turned into white fog in the air. She walked alone to the stands, and stood in the middle of a crowd of people she didn't recognize. She thought she saw Hannah and Ernie for a moment, but failed to call them over because of the taller people in front of her.

The whole match was rather uneventful. Meredith watched with only mild interest as the players flew around the field on their brooms. The other Slytherins sang "Weasley Is Our King" whenever possible; the song seemed to be unnerving Ron more than anything. He was never able to keep the Quaffle out of the goal hoops, so Slytherin quickly came into the lead.

Then Harry Potter saved the day, as usual, by catching the Snitch. Gryffindor won the match, but only after a Slytherin Beater—Meredith knew it was either Crabbe or Goyle because nobody else was that wide—pegged Harry in the head with a Bludger.

As soon as the game was over and the whistle blew, Meredith began making her way to the crowd of Gryffindors where she knew Neville would be. She saw Luna's great lion hat, so Neville couldn't be far from there.

They found each other at the exact same time and stood opposite one another, wondering what to say. Meredith had only planned as far as "I'm sorry." In the commotion of the moment, with happy Gryffindors surrounding them, it seemed like an awkward time to bring up something serious like this.

Fortunately, they both had the same idea. Meredith and Neville each ran forward and hugged the other tightly.

"I'm sorry, Neville, about your parents. I didn't know," Meredith said directly into his ear.

"It's okay. I'm sorry I got mad at you for something that wasn't your fault."

They were friends again.

Neville invited her to the party in the Gryffindor common room. Meredith accepted the invitation, so when they got into the castle, she removed her Slytherin scarf, put it in her pocket, and replaced it with Neville's Gryffindor one, hiding all visible Slytherin emblems.

When they arrived in the common room, however, the mood was considerably more sullen than it had been on the quidditch pitch, and rumor had it that Harry, Fred, _and_ George were banned from quidditch forever. That certainly put an end to the party plan.

Meredith waited and waited for someone to ask her what she was doing here, but nobody did. Even after removing her cloak and heavy robes, Meredith still wore the scarf to hide the Slytherin crest on her shirt. Nobody asked about it.

She and Neville talked for a long time about what was going on. They both had heard of Umbridge's new nickname, and laughed about it together. Meredith told him quietly about what she had heard Dumbledore say in her father's memory and asked his opinion about it.

"Professor Snape would only lie if he had to. I wouldn't say that if you hadn't told me about this summer how he carried you out of that forest, running the whole way. He really cares about you."

Reassured, Meredith told Neville about being in the D.A. now and asked him what had been going on at meetings. "It's probable I'll just be a lookout and not part of the learning, but I'm still wondering."

Neville told her about learning Stupefy, Expelliarmus, Impedimenta, Levicorpus, and all sorts of other protective jinxes. He described the setup of the Room of Requirement and how to get there. Meredith listened and let him talk, even though she already knew where the Room of Requirement was.

At about seven in the evening, Fred and George noticed Meredith. "Hello, Severusette," George said. His head was gone, but Meredith could recognize his voice.

"Yeah, fancy meeting you here!" Fred exclaimed, sitting down and groping where his invisible head should have been. He and George removed their hats and their heads reappeared.

"Hope we aren't interrupting an intimate private conversation," George said as he and his twin noticed Neville.

"Oh no, guys. We were just talking about the D.A.," Meredith explained.

"Funny, we came here—"

"To discuss exactly that."

"So, you've come up with a prank for Umbridge?"

"Of course, Severusette. How long did you expect it to take us? Fred, would you do the honors?"

Fred took a small box from his pocket and regally presented it to Meredith. It was made to look like a chocolate frog box, "Only it's filled with pink sugar like the kind Umbridge puts in her tea. It dissolves completely, just like sugar, so all you need to do is dump it into her sugar bowl."

"What does it do?" Meredith asked.

George cleared his throat. "Well, this was a sort of failed attempt at a Fever Fudge." He looked around to see if Hermione was watching. "This is the granulated version. We tested the candy version ourselves to add to the Skiving Snackboxes, and now we've got them perfected. They give you a huge fever instantly—"

"But this will give you a fever _and_ massive, pus-filled boils. We put a delayed effect charm on it so Umbridge won't suspect you and the tea."

"If you tried it yourselves, why did you never have boils?"

"Well, they're not in a place we generally display to the public…"

"Oh. Oh my. Sounds perfect. When and how do I do this?" Fred and George explained the details of the plan, drew a diagram of Umbridge's office (which they later threw into the fire), and talked back-up plans in the unlikely event that Meredith was caught. By the time they had finished talking, it was almost nine o'clock, curfew for the fifth years.

While putting on her cloak and preparing to leave, Meredith asked the twins, "Aren't you two concerned about this being traced back to you?"

"Nah," Fred responded. "Umbridge already chucked us off the quidditch team. I mean, what more can she do?"

Meredith handed the Gryffindor scarf back to Neville and thanked them all for talking with her and for letting her into Gryffindor tower. Then she hurried out of the portrait hole before any of the students in the common room recognized that the emblem on Meredith's robes was not that of Gryffindor.

* * *

That night it began to snow and didn't stop for a whole week. The lake froze over and there were at least three feet of snow on the ground everywhere at all times. Winter had come. Meredith was glad to have an excuse to wear long sleeved shirts all the time.

On Wednesday of that week, there was a small but long fireworks display on the seventh floor. As soon as she heard about it, Meredith rushed to Umbridge's office, found it unlocked, and put the fever sugar into the sugar bowl. This combined with the heart shaped box of Fever Fudge they would be leaving for Filch ensured a safe next D.A. meeting.

Meredith went upstairs and met Fred and George in a corridor whose entrance was an apparently solid wall, just as planned. She told them that everything had gone well. They planned to get Peeves to cause mayhem for Umbridge later.

Meredith found it fun to be a rebel. It added excitement to life cooped up inside. Hogsmeade weekends were becoming necessary in order to maintain sanity. The teachers gave so much homework.

A week later, Umbridge paced the classroom with a slight grimace on her face, trying hard not to wince with every step. Meredith put on her stoic face and tried hard not to laugh.

When she wasn't studying, Meredith was reading her Defense Against the Dark Arts book or trying to figure out how the fake Galleons, which Hermione made, worked. In the first week of December, she finally figured it out and decided to make a pair for herself and her father to share. Even though they saw each other every day, they didn't talk much.

Meredith stayed after class one day to give her father the Sickle she had charmed to show word messages instead of numbers. It worked kind of like a cell phone (which had been half the inspiration) but smaller and with magic. It would vibrate like a phone when a message was sent or received.

After Meredith showed her father how the Sickle worked, she apologized again for breaking into his mind. Then she asked about her grandparents.

"All dead," was the only response she got.

* * *

_Author's note that's not relevant to you unless you are a particular clarinet player:_

_Dear my friend the Clarinetist, you know who you are because you go to my school: sorry about all the Neville stuff. You can switch back characters if you want. I apologize in advance for chapter 16. Sorry if it makes you uncomfortable. Hope you still read the story._


	13. In Dreams

**Thanks to Parker K. Harvelle because I got the idea of dreamscapes from Rumor Has It. And sorry for copying Meredith's name, but I named her before I read Rumor Has It, so it isn't really copying, right? Everyone, after you read this chapter, go read Parker K. Harvelle's story ****Rumor Has It. ****I promise that my story will not have the same concept as that one. Sorry for the cliffhanger at the end. Actually, I'm not sorry at all. Ha ha.**

**To the Clarinetist, I really need to know your answer now. And just so you know, this book wasn't written to be an instruction manual. And it's actually chapter 17.**

Chapter Thirteen: In Dreams

That night, Meredith had the first of many strange dreams that she was always unable to shut out.

She was sitting under a tree by the shores of the lake with Neville, conjuring flowers. He made up beautiful-sounding names for each of them, because each flower was more beautiful than the last. They were both sitting with their backs against the tree, and the sun was shining brightly. The lake was a perfect still mirror of the sky. It was then that Meredith truly realized she dreamt in color. A cool breeze rustled the leaves and her hair, sending it flying Pocahontas-style. She was smiling and laughing. They were both smiling and laughing. Neville was closer.

Then, unexpectedly, their lips met and stayed there. Meredith closed her eyes, dreaming in the moment. She could have stayed there forever…

"Oh, dear, I just knew I would be interrupting a pleasant dream."

Meredith broke apart from Neville, expecting to see her father standing there with his arms crossed, wearing a stern look. But it wasn't her father.

Standing there was a tall, sixteen-year-old boy with pale skin, green eyes, and dark wavy hair. He was wearing Slytherin robes.

Meredith's surroundings, including Neville, disappeared, and she was in a blank white space.

"So you really have feelings for that boy?" the young man there asked.

"It's none of your business," Meredith replied. Truly, she herself didn't know the answer to his question. Something to think about when she woke up. "Who are you?" she asked.

"I believe we both know that answer, Miss Meredith."

His tone, it reminded her of someone. "Voldemort?" she guessed.

"Very good. Although, at this point in time, I am merely Tom Riddle."

"Tom Riddle. You became Lord Voldemort. But, what happened to you? You're…" _Handsome_ was the word she found but was reluctant to use.

"The form of me which you have seen before is a split form of myself. It is what happens when one splits his soul."

Meredith wanted to ask what he meant by that, but Tom/Voldemort continued. "Enough chatter. I wish for you to tell me what you know about Harry Potter."

Meredith couldn't stop herself. The words all tumbled out. "Well, he's formed this secret club called Dumbledore's Army and he's teaching kids real Defense Against the Dark Arts since Umbridge isn't teaching us anything."

"I see. And are you a part of this secret club?"

"Sort of. I'm a lookout. Harry doesn't talk to me. But Fred and George do. We've come up with a few pranks on Umbridge. You know, our common enemy. Everyone hates her."

"I see. Have you lost many friends to the fact that you are the daughter of Severus Snape?"

She told him. She told him all about how people had shunned her or begged her to raise their grades. She told him about her new friends who didn't care whose daughter she was. She told him about her fall-out with Neville, how sorry she felt for him, about how they had become friends again. She told him about Harry's refusing to talk to her. She told him about Fred and George's pranks on Umbridge, and how they always called her Severusette as if she was a younger, girl-version of her father, which she wasn't.

And throughout the entire conversation, Tom listened so diligently and offered such good advice that Meredith forgot for a while that she was talking to Voldemort, or the boy who would become Voldemort.

But he seemed so kind and understanding, nothing like the creepy bald man with snake eyes and no nose. He actually smiled and laughed at the pranks she played on Umbridge, particularly the delayed-action Fever Fudge in the tea.

"It's nice to talk to someone who understands, Tom," Meredith found herself saying toward the end of the conversation.

"I try to be understanding," Tom said, nodding politely. "It has been wonderful talking to you, Meredith. I must be going, and let you return to your dream. Another time?"

"Sure." Meredith nodded. Tom was gradually going out of focus. "Goodbye. Until next time."

She was sitting by the lake with Neville again, but they were both sitting up straight and blushing.

She woke up.

Meredith decided not to tell her father (or anyone else for that matter) about the dream. All the information she had given was harmless, and she didn't even know if she really had been talking to Voldemort or if Tom Riddle was just another made-up figment of her uncontrolled dreaming imagination.

The next morning she wrote in her diary:

_Thursday, December 6, 2012 5:29 AM_

_ Don't ask why I woke up so early. I've been up for an hour already. I woke up from this weird dream that I was talking to Tom Riddle, the younger version of You Know Who, the boy who eventually became You Know Who. I don't know why, but he started asking questions and I answered all of them truthfully. I don't know if it was real or now. It seemed so real and organized, unlike my normal dreams which most of the time involve flying giraffes or flaming chickens. I think I might've told Voldemort all I know about Harry Potter. There wasn't much, but Tom seemed so understanding and kind and he listened to everything I told him._

_ What I really want to figure out, other than if this was real or not (real or not real? Oh, the irony.), is why the dream started the way it did. __Life analysis time!__ I dreamt I was kissing Neville by the lake and then Tom so rudely interrupted. I don't know if I should consider this a dream or a nightmare. Tom asked if I have feelings for Neville and I told him it was none of his business. It's true that it's none of his business, but it's also true that I don't know the answer to that question. I'm not sure if I have a crush on Neville or not. I feel kinda stupid for not knowing. It's really complicated. We've been best friends for a while, and he didn't ditch me when we both found out that I'm "Professor Snape's daughter" like almost everyone else did. But a relationship will only complicate my life. I mean, I have the freaking __Dark Mark __on my arm! But I really did miss him when we weren't talking for a while back in October. Like, I_ _really really really__ missed him. Maybe that was just because I have no other best friends, or maybe it was for another reason. I'm confused. Maybe I really do like him. But I doubt that he could ever like me back. And if we dated, Dad would certainly go insane and ground me forever. Maybe it would be worth the risk, though. I don't know. I sort of thought that writing this stuff down would get it out of my head so I can focus on school today, but all it's done is make me think more. Great. I'm going to be daydreaming all day. I'm so stupid that way! WHY?!_

* * *

A week later, Meredith had the dream again.

She was sitting by the shore of the lake, under the tree again with Neville. They were kissing again, but this time Tom let them finish before he interrupted her dream. Neville faded away, but the lake was still there.

"Care to go for a walk?" Tom asked.

"Sure," Meredith said. She stood up and walked along the shore of the lake with Tom Riddle. "Why is it that whenever you come into my dreams, I'm dreaming of this one thing?"

"I do not know."

"Hmm." There was a short silence. Then Meredith asked, "Tom, when you take over the world, do you plan to rule America as well?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't I? America may be full of the most ignorant Muggles on the planet, but America has influence."

Her friends were in danger. But she could see Tom reading her thoughts, so she quickly asked him, "You said last time that you split your soul? How did you manage to do that? Did it hurt?

"My potions professor, Horace Slughorn, told me about Horcruxes after I found the word in a book in the library."

Horace the potions professor. He had retired when her father took the job. Meredith recognized the name from her mother's diary.

Tom continued, "He told me that to split your soul and create a Horcrux, you must kill someone and hide a part of your soul in an object. Does it hurt? Only if you're soft."

This boy was definitely Voldemort. Meredith pinched her own arm and woke up, feeling strangely calm.

_Friday, December 14, 2012 4:54 AM_

_ I had the dream again. I was sitting under the tree by the lake again, kissing Neville. I think it's kind of weird because that's the second time I've dreamt that. I don't usually get recurring dreams, not that I can remember. If I had Internet access I would look up what recurring dreams mean. Maybe I really do feel that way about him. Or maybe Tom is controlling my mind! That's a scary thought. Last night, I practiced Occlumency. I cleared my mind of everything (which is really difficult when your head is swimming from remembering a ton of charms) and __then __I went to sleep. But still, Tom managed to get in my head somehow. It freaks me out a little. Okay, more than a little. I'm more concerned about it than I was last week, that's for sure. I still think I can handle it on my own, though. There's no need to bother Dad with problems I can solve on my own. I hope I can solve this one on my own. Am I going insane?_

The night of December 15th, Meredith had the dream again. It started the same way as always.

"I'm sorry if I frightened you last time," Tom said.

"Did you really kill people to split your soul?" What a stupid question, she thought the moment she asked. This was _Lord Voldemort_, who didn't mind killing one-year-old little boys like Harry, making them orphans.

_Orphans_. Harry Potter was an _orphan_. She had never thought of it that way. The word had a sort of weight that made her feel much more sorry for him.

"Of course I kill people, Miss Meredith. How else am I supposed to rise to power? I must take down those who oppose me. In the words of one great Muggle leader, 'Death is the solution to all problems. No man, no problem.' Why are you making that face?"

"It's just…don't you ever feel sorry for killing people? I mean, they have families and people who love them and will miss them. Don't you care? What if someone killed _your_ family? How would you feel then?"

Flames flared up in Tom Riddle's eyes and his voice was harsh and cold as he proclaimed, "I feel no remorse. The world deserves this, for what it did to me."

And with that, Meredith woke up sweating.

* * *

Why she kept going to sleep, Meredith did not know. On some nights, she was afraid of slumber and the dreams it would bring, but other times she was curious to know more about the man she was pretending to serve.

She still didn't tell anyone about the dreams.

On December the eighteenth, the D.A. was going to have its last meeting for the term. Meredith met in the entrance hall with Fred and George after lunch. They gave her a little heart-shaped pink box with chocolates in it, and then gave her specific instructions on how to get it to Umbridge. They had their own box to put out for Filch to find.

After Defense Against the Dark Arts that afternoon, Meredith shuffled out of the classroom with everyone else, glancing back to look at Umbridge, who was headed up the stairs to her office. As soon as the door to the office had closed, Meredith dashed back to the desk at the front of the room and produced the box of chocolates from inside her robes. She set it carefully on the desk and snuck out of the room, feeling a tiny bit guilty about all the pain she was causing the High Inquisitor.

That evening, the only problem for the D.A. could have been Peeves the Poltergeist, but it seemed that the twins had thought of that too.

Meredith was allowed to attend the D.A. meeting as a student for once. She practiced defensive spells with Neville for a while until Harry pulled her aside and spoke to her for the first time since they were on the train. They went into a room off the main chamber, so as not to be overheard. As an extra precaution, Harry put an Imperturbable charm on the door. Meredith, personally, thought this was unnecessary.

Harry cleared his throat nervously. "First, er, what I'd like to say is I'm sorry that I've been mean to you. Um, I'm glad you're helping the D.A…and about Peeves, I want you to use this to distract him while we get back to the common rooms." Harry unfolded a silver-rippling cloak and handed it to Meredith. "It's my invisibility cloak. But you can't tell _anyone_ about it, not even your father, especially not him actually, and you'd better not get it confiscated. And you have to give it back afterwards, say fifteen minutes after the meeting lets out. That should give everyone enough time. I'll be here."

"Okay." Meredith examined the cloak and was tempted to put it on right then. An invisibility cloak! Gee what she would give to be invisible sometimes. "Where did you get this?" she asked Harry.

"I inherited it from my father. I guess it's been in the family for a while."

Darn. So she couldn't walk into Madam Malkin's and ask for one.

"Go now; find out where Peeves is. That might take some time."

"Alright. Bye." She turned to go.

"Meredith?"

"Yeah?"

"Um, this is going to sound really weird, but I'll tell you anyway. I had a dream this summer that you were being tortured by Voldemort, and then you got the Dark Mark on your arm."

"Have you been having strange dreams often, Harry?"

"Only one. The same one, over and over." He paused. "So, _do_ you have the Mark?" He reached for her left sleeve, but Meredith took a step back before he could touch her.

"If you touch it, I don't know what will happen to you. I do know for sure that your scar will burn. He might know."

"So you do have it?"

She looked away from those piercing green eyes, which were quite similar to Tom's, she realized. "Yes, but you can't tell anyone. Not even Ron or Hermione. I already told Neville and he freaked, so I don't want everybody else to be freaking out also."

"Right. I won't tell. And, Meredith, there's one more thing I have to ask you."

What could it possibly be? "Yeah?"

"Um, are you and Neville going out?"

Meredith almost had to laugh, the question was so unexpected. "No," she replied. "We're not."

"Okay. I was just wondering, since I see the two of you together at every possible moment. _Now _you can go find Peeves."

Meredith gladly walked out of the Room of Requirement, putting on the cloak as soon as she got outside.

It was weird, but oddly awesome to be invisible. When Meredith had gotten used to looking down at her feet and seeing nothing, she was able to concentrate on her surroundings. She was truly _invisible_. No lagging students could stare at her as she walked silently past; nobody came up to her and asked for help with potions. For once, she understood how Harry felt. The Boy Who Lived always got so much unwanted attention, especially since last June when he had started claiming Voldemort had returned; she could understand why this cloak was so precious to him.

She found Peeves in a jiffy, following the trail of smashed inkpots on the ground. She knew the Bloody Baron was the only one in the castle that Peeves obeyed, so when she was the shadows of the first students headed up to their dormitories, she shouted in the deepest voice she could muster, "That's quite enough chaos for tonight, Peeves. Be gone!" That did the trick.

"Oh, pardon me, Mister Baron, sir. Peevsie will be going right away, sir."

Fifteen minutes to ten, Meredith was standing in front of the door to the Room of Requirement, feeling accomplished. This job was easy. She walked through the doors and was very surprised to see Harry Potter and Cho Chang standing to one side of the room next to the wall that held al of the newspaper articles about Cedric Diggory and Voldemort's return, or the Ministry's denial of it. A tangle of mistletoe was growing from a ceiling rafter above them and they saw it. Then, much to Meredith's discomfort, Harry and Cho started kissing.

_Awk-ward_, Meredith thought. She quietly hung the cloak on a peg on the wall and slipped out of the room to give the couple some privacy. She went immediately back to the Slytherin dungeon, a bit surprised to find that she did not feel at all jealous of Cho Chang. She felt glad to know that she was finally over Harry.

That night, Meredith met with Tom Riddle in the dream again. Again, it started with the sequence about her and Neville.

"Hello again, Miss Meredith," Tom said sweetly. He acted as though nothing had happened in the last dream, as if she hadn't seen the fiery anger in his eyes.

"Hello, Tom," Meredith said flatly.

"Any news about Harry Potter?"

"Well, he's talking to me again."

"How wonderful. What did he say?"

"He had a dream this summer that I was tortured by you and then I got the Dark Mark."

"And he asked if it was true and you told him it was?"

"Yes. It's not like I could blatantly lie to him about something like that. He's smart enough that he would make me prove I didn't have the Mark."

"I see. Has he been having other strange dreams?" Voldemort wasn't interested in the last part.

"Yes. He told me he's been having the same one over and over. I don't know what, though. He didn't say."

"If he ever does say, will you tell me?"

"Of course." Meredith wasn't sure she'd made a conscious decision to say those words. Was he possessing her mind? She wondered.

Suddenly, Tom grew still and pale. His eyes stared off into the distance, but he didn't seem to be seeing anything.

"Tom? Are you alright? Tom!"

As quickly as Tom Riddle had become stiff, his posture relaxed and he looked at her. "I apologize, Miss Meredith. It seems that something…I must be going. I may not be seeing you for a while. Goodbye."

Meredith didn't have time to say goodbye before she woke up.

* * *

The next morning, none of the Weasleys were around. Rumor had it that their father was injured. After potions class, Meredith's father signaled for her to stay a moment.

"Yeah?" she asked when the room was empty.

"Did you know that Arthur Weasley was nearly killed last night by a snake presumed to be that of the Dark Lord himself?"

"What?!"

"He was on duty guarding you-know-what at the Ministry for the Order, and was attacked."

"Why?"

"I do not know, and neither does anyone else. The most we can guess is that the snake was after the prophecy."

"But why did it attack Mr. Weasley? Is he alright? How did they find him?"

"Mr. Weasley is currently in St. Mungo's hospital. He is doing fine. Potter had a dream last night about him being bitten, went to tell the headmaster, and it turned out to be true."

Meredith could only gape at hearing what had happened.

Then she made a connection. Tom had left in a hurry. Did he know that Harry was seeing the actions of his snake?

"And what's more, Potter dreamt it from the snake's point of view."

Theory confirmed. Meredith's dreams about Tom were real. She had told him so many things, some of them merely trivial but others not, and Voldemort really knew them now.

"Are you alright?" her father asked. When she nodded and got the stupid-looking expression off her face, he asked, "Is there anything you need to tell me?"

"No." She wasn't about to explain her dreams to him. She tried to keep the images off the surface of her mind, so they couldn't easily be seen.

"Very well. Let me write you a pass to your next class. Unless you would rather run."

Walking upstairs from the dungeons at her own leisurely pace, Meredith wondered how much her father really did know. Did he know about the now-disbanded running group, for example? Did he know she was hiding something important from him? He must. He could always see through her Occlumency and tell when she was lying.

That Friday marked the end of the term. As the students packed and left for Hogsmeade station on Saturday morning, Meredith was jealous of them. They all got to go home to their wonderful happy families while here she was with _who_ for a father? Snape. She would be spending three whole weeks without her friends in an almost empty castle…

An almost empty castle free for her to roam about. She instantly thought about the Room of Requirement.

On her way out of the Great Hall after breakfast, Neville caught up with her. "Hey, Meredith. Do you want to go to Hogsmeade and hang out before the train comes?"

"Sure, Neville. I assume you're all packed and ready to get back home?"

"Yeah. I'll miss you, though."

Meredith kept on a happy face and tried not to blush.

Neville bit his lip. "I'll meet you in the courtyard, alright? I just need to get my trunk." He walked off quickly.

"Don't forget you can _levitate_ it down the stairs!" Meredith called after him. Then she went to her dormitory and put on her warm outdoor clothes. There were three feet of snow on the ground. After thinking twice, Meredith put on the knee-high boots she had gotten that summer. She had a feeling they would work better in the snow than well-worn Converse would.

She met with Neville ten minutes later and trudged through the snow to the horseless carriages that had taken them to the castle at the start of term.

"You know, I've always wondered how these carriages work," she said. "There can't be a motor; there's no room. And it doesn't look like anything's pulling it, either."

"Oh, there's something pulling the carriage, all right. I can see it. It's a thestral, a winged horse, only sort of skeletal and like a dragon. They can only be seen by people who've seen… death."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"It's alright. Besides, with you being a double agent working with You Know Who, you might be able to see them soon too."

She grimaced. He was right.

"I'm sorry," he said. They didn't talk any more until they had hopped out of the carriage and Neville had put his luggage on the train platform with the rest of the students'. "Well, there's an hour before the train arrives, so where do you want to go?"

"Someplace warm," Meredith answered. Her feet were plenty warm, but the rest of her was not.

"Three Broomsticks?"

"Sure. I don't know what or where that is, but sure."

The streets of Hogsmeade were somewhat swept clear of snow, so it wasn't as deep as in some places. Meredith and Neville walked along the main street, passing the sweet shop, the joke shop, and a group of singing people before they reached a place that looked like a normal restaurant. Inside, there were a few Hogwarts students and a whole lot of strangers. They sat down at a small table and shed their outer layers of damp, thick clothing. A waiter came over and asked what they would like. "Two butterbeers, please," Neville said.

As soon as the waiter had nodded and left, Meredith leaned over the table and whispered sharply, "If has alcohol, I'm not drinking it!"

"Relax, Meredith. It's like that Muggle drink, um, _Root_beer, except it has a buttery flavor. Do you think they would let underage wizards order it if it had alcohol in it?"

Meredith didn't answer, but sat back in her chair, a little calmer. Spontaneously, she asked, "Neville, do you have a nickname?"

"No, not really. Sometimes my relatives call me Nev, but I don't really like that. What about you?"

"In America, some of my friends would call me Merry." _But I don't think that's really accurate now_, she thought. _And it hasn't been since June._

They were both silent until the butterbeers came. Meredith took a small sip to taste it and almost gagged. She was able to swallow, but only barely.

"What?" Neville asked.

"Buttery," Meredith managed to say. "And cinnamony." She didn't like butter in large amounts, and had always hated cinnamon (although, thoroughly-frosted cinnamon rolls were an exception).

"Don't like it?"

"No. Sorry. I'll pay for it."

"No, that's okay. Do you want hot cocoa instead?"

"Um, sure." She felt embarrassed for making such a big deal out of butter and cinnamon. Most wizards seemed to like butterbeer, Meredith gathered by looking around the room at other customers. For some reason, she was the exception. Perhaps it had something to do with the vampire incident.

Meredith looked at Neville and found that he was staring directly at her. He looked down into his drink as soon as their gazes met. A few minutes later, the waiter came by again, and Meredith ordered a hot cocoa. When it came, Meredith learned that her taste for chocolate had definitely not been scared away by the vampires.

Half an hour later, they were walking back to the train platform for Neville's departure. All the luggage was already on the train, so all he had to do was find it.

"D'you think we could meet up somewhere over the holiday?" Neville asked when they were walking up the stairs to the cement platform, careful not to slip on the ice.

"Sure. That would be nice."

"I'll send you an owl, okay?"

"Okay."

To Meredith's surprise, Neville moved forward to hug her. She hugged him back, and something in the back of her mind felt fluttery. She could feel her cheeks start to turn red; if anyone asked, it was because of the cold.

"I'll see you soon," she said as they broke apart. If she wasn't mistaken, Neville's cheeks looked a little "cold" too.

"Right." Before she knew it, Neville had planted a singe sweet peck on her right cheek. Then he was gone, lost in the hoards of students now flooding the platform.

Meredith felt positively elated, and walked back to Hogwarts with a slight tiptoe spring in her step. Humming to herself as she entered the nearly empty castle, she thought about the Room of Requirement. She could use it as a music room.

Meredith had taken piano lessons for two years when she was eight and nine, but quit because she hated practicing. Fife was becoming boring, and she had already played all the songs she knew at the Triwizard tasks the previous year. _Why not?_ she asked herself, heading up to the seventh floor.

I need a music room, she thought as she paced three times in front of the empty wall. A small, ornate door appeared. Meredith tried to turn the knob and found that the door was locked. She pulled out her wand and murmured, "_Alohomora_." It didn't work. She used all the opening spells she knew, and even tried ramming her shoulder into the door. None of it worked, and she left the seventh floor frustrated, confused, and with a sore arm.

She heard the sound of sliding stone behind her and looked back to see the door disappearing. For a second it appeared that the room was smiling, laughing at her. "I'll be back," she told it. "And I hope we can be friends."

With nothing to do inside the castle except sulk under Umbridge's surveillance, Meredith went back to Hogsmeade to do her Christmas shopping. On her way out of the castle, she jotted down a quick list of the people to buy gifts for.

She started at a shop with a large Christmas card display and bought a card for every person on her list. Then she went perusing the other stores. A Rememberall for Neville because he was always forgetting things; Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans for Harry; an assortment of candy for Ron, Hermione, Fred, and George. But what to get for her father? It had to be something special, since this would be their first Christmas together truly as father and daughter. She had an idea of what to get him, but she would have to go into the Muggle world for that, and she didn't even know if what she wanted was even sold in England. Nevertheless, it couldn't hurt to try. She would need to go to Gringotts and get some Muggle money, though.

As Meredith walked in the castle doors, still mapping out a way to get to Diagon Alley from here, she was met by her father.

"Ah, you have finally returned. I have important matters to discuss."

"Dad, give me a minute. I just got here and I'm soaking wet."

"Right. Meet me in my classroom in fifteen minutes." He hurried off to the dungeons.

_My dad is a dungeon bat,_ Meredith sang unhappily in her head as she half-skipped through the empty corridors down to the Slytherin dorms. She put her stuff down on her bed, took off her wet cloak and robes, and exchanged them for clean, dry jeans and one of her plain white button-up school shirts. Over it she wore the sweater Mrs. Weasley had made for her last Christmas. Then, because it was still too cold to go barefoot, she put on her old worn Converse sneakers and was off to her father's classroom.

Her shoes made a soft tapping noise on the smooth stone floor, and echoed around the corridor, making the castle feel even emptier to Meredith. She wasn't sure if she liked the silence, but a profound sense of loneliness washed over her all of a sudden. She tried to ignore it and kept walking.

In his classroom, her father had set out a larger cauldron than the kind they used in class, a set of scales, a line of different types of knives and tools, and a single tiny vial. As Meredith walked in to the room, Severus Snape stood up from a stool where he had been sitting, and stayed beside the table that was all set up for potion making.

"Well?" Meredith asked when they had both been standing there for a few seconds.

Severus ignored how much Meredith looked and sounded like her mother. It pinched his heart, but only slightly. "Today I am going to teach you how to make an effective antidote."

"For what?"

He picked up the small vial of milky liquid. "This. Nagini's venom. The healers at St. Mungo's are not having much success. I figured we might step in and save a life."

"Good idea. So, how do you make an antidote?"

"Have you eaten recently?"

"Not since this morning. Why?"

"This will not be a quick process. Go eat and come back in half an hour."

"Okay." She turned back around and, not wanting to be alone in the Great Hall, went to the kitchens. The house elves were all too eager to make lunch for her. They even added a cup of false blood to go with it. When Meredith had finished eating, she returned to the dungeons, where her father was again waiting for her.

Making the antidote for Nagini's poison was very complicated. Several times, Meredith's father had to go beyond the school grounds and Apparate to Diagon Alley to find something at the apothecary while she stirred the potion. Meredith's hands ached from chopping and crushing and stirring, and her head hurt from the potion fumes. Once, she had to step outside and sit with her head in her hands to keep from vomiting. There would have only been stomach acid, for she was hungry again.

Eight hours after they began creating the potion, they finally finished. Meredith was exhausted and felt a little nauseous again, but she proudly held the instructions they had created along the way, just in case the antidote was ever needed again.

"Why couldn't we just use a bezoar?" she asked.

"Bezoars do not work for all things, and this snake's venom is one of them. Also, this was a good time to teach you exactly how tedious and difficult potion making can be. In your sixth year, should you choose to take the N.E.W.T. level of potions, you will learn more about antidotes. That will be all for today, though. Thank you for your help and perseverance. This was not an easy task; let us hope it will be well worth it. Now you may go."

"Thank you," Meredith breathed as she fast-walked out of the room and up the stairs.

She stood in a stall of the girls' lavatory for a long time, trying to think of a spell she could use to ease her pounding head. Her ears burned and rang. At last she emerged and went directly to the sink to wash her face. She drank some cool water, which helped a little bit, and was startled to hear a girl's voice behind her. "Who are _you_ and why are you here? Come to make fun of me?"

Meredith whirled around and leaned against the sink to keep her balance. "I-I don't want to make fun of you," she said. Now she just wanted to sleep. Here, now, on this exact floor…

"My, you do look _awful_." The ghost girl giggled. "Go on to the nurse, before you get sick all over the place."

"Right," Meredith agreed. She had no idea that potion fumes could affect her this much. She slowly tested her weight on her wobbly legs and made her way out of the restroom, through the corridors, and into the hospital wing. The great clock struck ten as she walked into Madam Pomfrey's office and asked, "Madam Pomfrey, do you have anything for headache and nausea?"

Later, she could not remember being given a potion and being led to a bed in the main chamber of the hospital wing.

* * *

When Meredith awoke a few hours later, she felt perfectly fine. She could hear her father talking with Madam Pomfrey and Professor Dumbledore in Madam Pomfrey's office. She got out of bed and walked toward the office door. Dumbledore was speaking. "…Poppy, I do believe that nothing is wrong with Miss Meredith" –Meredith cringed; that was what Tom called her—"In fact, I think she might like to come in and participate in this chat. Meredith?"

She opened the door and took a step into the room. Her father stood up quickly from his chair. Keeping his composure, he walked over to her and asked, "Are you alright?"

"Yes. I'm fine now."

"Good. You worried us."

Dumbledore conjured a chair for her and she sat down. Severus went back to his seat. _That was it?_ Meredith asked herself. _No hug or "I was so worried about you, Merry! Thank goodness you're alright"?_ Oh well. What more could she expect with a dungeon bat for a father?

"Meredith, could you describe exactly what happened to you?"

She told her story, and ended with, "Why are we still talking about this? I feel fine now."

"We are still discussing this," Professor Dumbledore said, "because where you went, you left a trail of blood."

* * *

**PS: The quote that Tom Riddle says from a famous Muggle leader is from Joseph Stalin. I learned about it while researching for a project this past year.**


	14. Christmas With the Snapes

Chapter Fourteen: Christmas with the Snapes (_Featuring the Longbottom Family!_)

"You being female," Dumbledore continued, "there might have been a logical explanation; however, Madam Pomfrey tells me that the explanation is not valid at this time."

"Where was the blood coming from then?" Meredith asked fearfully.

"Your neck."

Meredith's hand instinctively went to the bite marks on the side of her throat. She found a bandage there.

"Professor Dumbledore believes it may be time for you to take another dose of anti-venom," Madam Pomfrey explained. "But, since your eyes are still red, meaning the false blood is still in your system, taking the potion would cause you to become more ill than you were yesterday, as any human being who drank blood would. Your other option" –she sighed—"is to become a full vampire and allow the venom to overtake your body. There are advantages and disadvantages to this. First, you would have more power and strength than you ever imagined, but you would have to give up your wand to the Ministry of Magic. Second, you will have unlimited freedom, but you will have to leave Hogwarts castle unless you control your bloodthirst. Third, you can be the Order's missionary to other vampires, but with that you risk losing the Dark Lord's trust. The choice is yours. You can either completely destroy the vampire in you, or allow it to take you."

Meredith thought hard. What kind of a hospital was this? She had just woken up and was already being forced to choose a permanent way of life. "Can I hang out in the in-between for a while like I have been? That way I can be human most of the time, but vampire when I need to be."

"Very well. Stay away from garlic. Now, you may want to go to your dormitory and rest awhile," Dumbledore said, rising from his chair. He walked out of the room and the rest of the party followed.

An hour later, Meredith was in her bed in the Slytherin fifth-year girls dormitory and couldn't sleep. So, she changed out of her pajamas, took a long hot shower, dressed, dried and brushed her hair, brushed her teeth, dabbed a bit of makeup on her face, and exited the Slytherin dungeon. She headed to the seventh floor, stood in front of the empty wall, and closed her eyes. _Focus. Just focus. I need a room where I can be alone and just play music. I need a place—_

The sound of stone scraping against stone interrupted her thoughts. Her eyes snapped open and she grinned at the large decorated door in front of her. Remembering what had happened the day before, she reached out and turned the knob. Mildly surprised that it was unlocked, she went into the Room of Requirement. Her grin returned as she saw the grand piano in the center of the room, bookshelves of theory books and music, the guitar on the piano bench, and the vast emptiness of the acoustically adjusted room. It was perfect. Absolutely genius. "Thank you, Hogwarts," she sad aloud.

There were Muggle songs on the shelves, as well as wizard songs from bands with weird names.

The date was December 23, 2012.

Meredith spent hours in the Room that day. There was a bathroom off the main chamber, and a passageway that led directly to the kitchens. Before Meredith knew it, the time was 9:30 PM, past curfew for fifth years. She found another passageway from the Room leading down and followed it. A few minutes later, she pushed back a floor stone and emerged in the dormitory, right under her bed. _How convenient_, she thought to herself, half-sarcastically.

The next morning, Meredith was planning to go to Hogsmeade again and search for a gift to give her father. She still had no idea what to get.

After sleeping in late and taking her time getting ready, Meredith went to the Great Hall for breakfast. Halfway there, she met her father, who handed her a letter.

"You missed the post. It's from Longbottom, asking if you would like to traverse London with him on Christmas morning."

Meredith took the letter and waited for her father to leave. When he didn't she opened the envelope and decided to read the letter in his presence.

_Dear Meredith,_

_I was wondering if you'd like to come with Gran and me to Diagon Alley and some other places in London on Christmas. It's okay if you'd rather spend time with your dad, but I hope you can come. Please reply as soon as you can._

_-Neville_

"Well?" Severus asked.

"You read my mail again."

"Of course I did. I'm still not sure what is going on between you two."

Meredith rolled her eyes, but decided not to get mad at her father now. "Can I go? Please?"

"Alright. But only because I know where you will be going."

"Where, other than Diagon Alley?"

"The Longbottom family goes every Christmas to visit Frank and Alice, Neville's parents, in St. Mungo's. While you are there, I would like for you to pay a visit to Arthur Weasley and put this vial of anti-venom where the healers can find it, with this note." He took both the note and the vial of potion from a pocket of his robes and gave them to her. "Now go to the owlery and send a reply."

Meredith did as she was told. (And while she was in the owlery, she sent the Christmas gifts to people.) She knew her father wasn't entirely thrilled about her going somewhere with Neville, and on Christmas no less, but Neville's grandmother would be there the whole time. Plus, Severus Snape needed to get used to having a teenage daughter, or things were going to get very awkward very fast. Not that they weren't already.

She couldn't wait for tomorrow. She had been so preoccupied with other things that she hadn't realized how soon Christmas was coming. Meredith ate breakfast and spent the rest of the day in the Room of Requirement, mastering popular Muggle songs on the guitar and the piano. Once she knew them well enough, she began to sing.

Meredith never knew she had such a voice. She had not sung a single song in over a year, couldn't whistle to save her life, and sung only happy birthday because songs with words weren't part of her group's normal repertoire.

She sang her heart out until she got tired, and left the Room with a warm fuzzy feeling inside.

The next morning, Meredith woke up earlier than usual. She couldn't sleep any longer. She arrived early to breakfast, but stayed waiting for the post. When it came, she got a reply from Neville.

_Dear Meredith,_

_I'm so glad you can come with us! Can you meet me by Gringotts at 9? We'll be there even if you can't make it at that time. Owl back if you can't. Sorry for the late notice on this, by the way._

_-Neville_

Nine o'clock. She had one hour. Meredith got up and headed to her father's classroom to ask if he could Apparate her to Gringotts in an hour.

Severus Snape was in his office organizing the jars on the shelves. "Good morning, daughter," he said without facing her when she walked into the room.

"Good morning, father," she replied. She was about to explain the contents of Neville's letter when he spoke again.

"Nine o'clock, I know. We'll leave a few minutes early to get outside the gate. Go get your purse, or whatever it is women carry around nowadays."

Meredith smiled. "Thanks, Dad."

On Meredith's way out, her father called after her, "Don't forget the potion and the note."

"I won't," she called back.

The Bloody Baron was in the common room when she got there. "Merry Christmas, Baron."

"Mm…same to you," he said, and floated through the ceiling. Meredith would have to ask him about the ghost in the bathroom some other time. All she could remember of the girl was her ridiculous giggle.

At 8:45, Meredith walked with her father out onto the snow-covered castle grounds, carrying her school backpack, only with the potion, the note, her Christmas present for Neville, her fife, and the rest of the normal contents of her pockets. In the pocket of her jeans was the fake Sickle that she could use to text her father. She wore her warmest jeans, the lace-up boots, a long-sleeved shirt, her Weasley sweater, a coat, her House scarf, and a beanie cap. Her hair was in two long braids, each tied off with a tight white ribbon.

When they reached the gate, Meredith took her father's arm and they Disapparated to Diagon Alley. It was 8:55. Standing in front of Gringotts Bank, Meredith looked around, but she didn't see Neville or any old woman who might be his grandmother. She gave her father a quick hug goodbye, which she didn't think he had been expecting, and looked around once again.

"Supper in my office at seven?" Severus asked.

"Sure." Meredith nodded.

"Good. I have a surprise for you." Severus Snape smiled for a split second. "You know how to reach me, should you need to. Remember to visit Mr. Weasley." He lowered his voice. "Should you feel the Mark burn, you must tell me straight away, and I will come get you." He switched back to normal volume again. "I shall see you soon. Have a good time, don't do anything reckless, be careful, all those things fathers are supposed to say. Goodbye." He Disapparated.

Meredith went directly into Gringotts to get some Muggle money so she could get her father a gift. She had until seven o'clock that night. And what had he meant by 'surprise'?

Gathering her courage, Meredith marched up to the desk of the head goblin, trying to avoid looking at any of the other creepy things. She cleared her throat, and the goblin looked up. "Excuse me, how do I exchange wizard money for Muggle money?"

"Come with me, miss." The goblin stood up and wobbled along, leading Meredith to a room off the main one. He sat down behind a large wooden desk. "Which vault?"

"Can I just make an exchange?" She took a pouch of gold from her backpack.

"Yes, that will be fine. How many Muggle pounds?"

"Um, how about thirty?" If she had any left over, all the better.

"That will be three Galleons, please."

Meredith handed the goblin the money and got a twenty-pound and a ten-pound note in return. Her fingers brushed against the goblin's long sharp nails. A chill ran up her spine.

"Thank you," she said.

The goblin pulled out a piece of paper from the desk. He dipped his quill in the ink and said, "Full name, please. For the records."

"Meredith Lily Snape."

The goblin looked up at her. Before Meredith knew it, her mind was being searched. She tried to kick out the goblin's consciousness, but couldn't.

It was over. The goblin spoke as he wrote, "Meredith Lily Snape. Heiress to a portion of the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black. Heiress to the Snape vault. Sign here, please. First time procedure." Meredith signed her name, wondering if Neville and his grandmother would be here yet. "Thank you, Miss Snape. Will that be all?"

"Yes, thanks."

She pocketed the new Muggle money, making note to look at it closely later, for she had never seen a pound note before. Then, feeling very grown up and official, Meredith left the bank.

Meredith waited outside on the steps of the bank for two minutes before Mrs. Longbottom and a slightly slouching Neville came around the corner. "Stand up straight, Neville. You're starting to pick up that annoying habit your father used to have," Mrs. Longbottom was saying. Meredith stood up, and Mrs. Longbottom brightened up. "Yes, you must be Meredith. Forgive me, what is your surname again?"

"Snape."

"Oh yes. Now I remember. The professor's daughter. Yes, I do wonder what _he_ thinks of this. Now, then, Meredith, so delighted you could come. Augusta Longbottom." She shook Meredith's hand. "You're a bit taller than I expected. You take after your father in that respect, I suppose."

"Oh." Meredith stepped down from the bottom step of Gringotts and shrunk almost six inches. Neville snickered.

Mrs. Longbottom smiled a little. Now, our first stop is St. Mungo's. We'll walk, since they strongly discourage Apparition inside, you two are underage, and it should be a nice walk."

They went through the Leaky Cauldron and out onto the Muggle street.

"You might want to hide your scarf," Neville whispered.

"Nah. The Muggles think this stuff is cool, believe me. You might even see some of _them_ wearing Hogwarts stuff."

"Your eyes are purple too."

"There's a logical Muggle explanation for that: contact lenses. Don't worry." _It's your grandmother we should be worrying about,_ she almost added. Augusta Longbottom was wearing a long green dress, a fox fur, and a pointy hat with a stuffed vulture on it.

"What are you two whispering about back there? Come up here. Now, Meredith, tell me about Slytherin. I thought you were in Gryffindor."

Meredith explained the Sorting Hat's mistake.

"You still seem like a nice girl. You've been helping my Neville in potions, I've heard. Pity he hasn't got his father's talent."

Meredith suddenly felt very uncomfortable. "He's good at herbology, though," she commented, trying to make the situation less awkward for Neville. "He's been helping me with that lately."

"That's good."

They were silent the rest of the way to the closed shop that was actually St. Mungo's hospital. The snow had been swept off the sidewalks and roads, but it was still slippery.

Half of the shops were closed for the holiday. The other half were getting only a few customers because the world was indoors celebrating Christmas with big families and smiles and gifts…

This was the life Meredith once had. In the United States, she had a whole family: mom, dad, sister, grandma, grandpa, grandma #2, grandpa #2, aunt, uncle, aunt #2, uncle #2, cousins one, two, three, and four, the whole deal. And in a few seconds, Dumbledore had torn it all down. Then came ten months with a mom, dad, six brothers, and a sister. Life was good. Then Voldemort tore _that_ all down and she only had a dad, a few distant crazy aunts, and an evil cousin. Life was great.

"Meredith? You okay?"

Meredith fought the stinging behind her eyes. "Yeah. I'm fine." Besides, there were plenty of people out there with only one parent, and some who didn't even have _any_ relatives. She should be grateful.

At St. Mungo's, they went directly to the fourth floor, where the patients with permanent spell damage lived. Meredith started to feel a bit bad, and began having second thoughts about deciding to come.

Neville was looking worse every minute. Meredith tried to understand how difficult this must be for him. His parents were insane. They had been tortured to insanity by Bellatrix Lestrange. Bellatrix Lestrange was Meredith's aunt. She felt more guilty and ashamed than ever before.

When they walked into the ward, Meredith's heart began pumping furiously. She thought she might be sick or explode or cry or all three. Her heart almost stopped when she saw the woman with thinning grey hair, and the man with a blank expression on his wrinkled face. The woman was milling about, putting things on shelves and blowing bubbles with gum. The man was laying in bed, staring blankly at the ceiling, his mouth open.

"Happy Christmas, Frank. Happy Christmas, Alice," Mrs. Longbottom said.

"Hey, mum. Hey, dad," Neville said sadly, looking at the ground. Alice Longbottom came over to Neville and held out her hand. Neville took the bubble gum wrapper she gave him. "Thanks, mum."

Then something Meredith wasn't expecting happened. Alice came over and offered Meredith a gum wrapper. She hesitated, but took it, saying "Thank you."

A few minutes later, Neville asked Meredith again, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I think I'll just slip out for a second and visit Mr. Weasley." She paused. "I'm really sorry about your parents, Neville. I never knew the extent of what my aunt did." She stood up from her chair and headed out of the ward to find a restroom.

She found one rather quickly and stayed at the sink for a few minutes, trying not to cry. Then she rinsed her face with water and dried off. Meredith took the vial and note out of her backpack. The ward name and floor were on the outside of the envelope. Meredith silently thanked her father for knowing that she would get lost without directions in this huge place.

In the ward, she found half of the Order of the Phoenix talking in whispers. Trying not to interrupt, she silently walked over to the low shelf by the bed and set down the vial of antidote and the envelope. Mr. Weasley noticed her.

"Meredith! So good to see you again! How are you?"

_I'm a right sight better than you_, she thought. "I'm doing alright, thanks. Are you feeling better yet, Mr. Weasley?"

"Improving slowly but surely."

"Meredith!" Mrs. Weasley came forward and crushed Meredith in a big motherly bear hug. Then Molly held her adoptive daughter at arm's length. "How you've changed! And in such a short time. My, your eyes look lovely! How has school been?"

"It's going well," was all she said.

"What brings you here?"

She decided to tell half the truth. "I'm here with Neville and his grandmother. Thought I'd drop by here for a minute." She wanted to add, _to escape the guilt_.

Mrs. Weasley seemed to understand what Meredith wasn't saying. She nodded, then smiled brightly once more. "Merry Christmas, dear. It's good to see you."

"Merry Christmas, everyone." Meredith looked around the room and saw a few unfamiliar faces. Among those she did know, there was a man with a staff and one great big blue eye.

"Professor Moody," she said.

"I was never the professor," Mad-Eye Moody half-growled. "Some idiot Death Eater thought it would be funny to use polyjuice potion to teach and ultimately lead Potter to He Who Must Not Be Named. I was locked in a trunk for nine months, hadn't ye heard?"

"I think I might've heard a little about that, and something about a Death Eater being involved."

"And you know that He Who Must Not Be Named has returned, don't ya?"

"Yeah. I saw him. I was there when he dueled Harry." Moody's blue eye flicked to Meredith's left arm. Nobody spoke for a while. "Well, I'd best be getting back. Merry Christmas."

"Goodbye," they said in intervals.

That_ was weird_, Meredith thought as she fast-walked through the corridors and back to the permanent spell damage ward. She was surprised to see Harry, Ron, and Hermione there. Alice was giving Neville another bubblegum wrapper. "Throw that away, Neville, she's already given you enough of those to paper your bedroom by now," Mrs. Longbottom was saying. Neville stuck the wrapper in his pocket anyway and kept looking down.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione were leaving when they caught sight of Meredith. Harry gave her a curious look that asked if she had lied to him about her and Neville. She smiled at him and his friends. "Merry Christmas," she said.

"Merry Christmas," Harry and Hermione said back. Ron just gave her a half-glare.

"Bye, Meredith. Bye, Neville. It was nice seeing you," Hermione said, linking arms with the boys and dragging them away. _We're off to see the Wizard…_ Meredith thought as she watched them go.

"We'll be going home now. Would you like to come with us, Meredith?" Mrs. Longbottom said.

It wasn't even half past ten. Meredith didn't need to be anywhere until seven that evening. "Sure," she agreed.

"Good. We'll walk again. If there's anywhere you'd like to stop on the way, all you have to do is say so."

"Okay." They walked out of St. Mungo's onto the Muggle street. There were more people around now. Couples walking hand in hand, shop owners smiling merrily on the doorsteps of their shops, children playing in the snow while their parents warned them not to slip and fall…

Again, Meredith wished for the life she once had. But for the first time, she considered what Neville would be feeling, watching all these kids who would grow up with loving parents and supportive relatives. Meredith felt selfish. Neville had lost his parents to literal insanity when he was only a year old, and here she was moping about six months? She had grown up with a loving mom and dad. She was almost an adult now, old enough to take care of herself. She couldn't complain.

Soon they arrived at a cute two-story house with a little white picket fence and a large red door. Meredith tried hard not to compare it with the industrial-age tenement she lived in.

The inside of the house was just as quaint as the outside. It was warm and neat. There was a glass cabinet filled with little figurines of magical beings on the wall of the living room. It reminded Meredith a tiny bit of the potions cabinet in the dining room at her house.

You can set down your bag over here," Neville said. He took her bag and put it at the foot of a hat stand. Meredith started to take off her coat and was a little surprised when Neville helped her out of it and hung the coat on a hook on the wall.

"Thanks," she said, hoping her cheeks didn't appear "cold."

They went into the adjoining room, which had a sofa, a bookshelf, a coffee table, a lamp, and—Meredith's heart skipped a beat— a small upright piano.

Mrs. Longbottom must have seen Meredith's reaction, for after commenting on what a gentleman Neville was being, she looked at the piano and back at Meredith. "Do you play?"

"Yeah, I do."

"How interesting! Would you like to play something now? I'm afraid no one's played it since Alice and Frank…Alice was the only one who ever played. It should be tuned, though. Go ahead."

Meredith slowly went over to the piano and sat down on the bench. She lifted the cover from the keys and thought about what to play. Almost instantly, she began Bach's Prelude, which just happened to be the instrumental line for her favorite version of the Ave Maria. She had been practicing this song, both singing and playing, but when it came time for the vocal entrance, something stuck in her throat so she couldn't get a sound out. It was all she could do to keep going and not tear up. She decided that an instrumental would be fine. She wasn't ready to reveal her voice yet anyway, even if she did think she could sound exactly like one of those singers.

When she finished, Neville and his grandmother clapped. Mrs. Longbottom was crying. "That used to be Alice's favorite. I do doubt that I could sing it now, not like I used to. Oh, things are so different. No matter. We've made the best of it for so long, and that is exactly what we shall continue to do. Would you mind playing another, dear?" Mrs. Longbottom sat on the sofa as Meredith launched into Satie's Gymnopedie. This was one she remembered from her past lessons. It had been her second recital piece. The first had been a simple version of Pachelbel's Canon in D. There had only been two recitals.

Neville left the room around measure seventeen and returned a few moments later with a box wrapped in silver paper and tied with a purple ribbon.

Meredith tried once again to put herself in the others' shoes. It had become a sort of habit, part of her promise to be observant. Mrs. Longbottom was obviously remembering past times when her daughter-in-law would play piano. She had her eyes closed and was swaying gently with the music.

Neville was probably remembering too. Or, at least, trying to remember something he had only vaguely known. Meredith again felt sorry for him, and ashamed that _her aunt_ had taken away from him what every child deserves to have. Why was she here right now?

_Because I'm not like Bellatrix_, she remembered. _I'm not like any of them. I'm not like Narcissa, or Draco, or Dad, or…_

She didn't know if she was like her mother. They certainly looked alike. But then again, Aunt Cissy had said that Meredith looked a bit like Bellatrix too.

Neville could have been the Boy Who Lived. His parents would be dead instead of insane, and he would be the one everybody expected to save the world, the one with the lightning scar. It would certainly be easier to cope with dead parents rather than being reminded of their suffering each holiday. If Neville could handle this, then he truly was a Gryffindor. How could anyone live through that and still manage to be happy?

This was going from observant to judgmental much too quickly. Of course he could be happy. Why not? Sadness and depression don't linger forever. Why had she assumed that? She could be happy too, regardless of what happened to her, so why shouldn't Neville be?

When the song ended, Mrs. Longbottom got up and said, "Lovely. I'll go make tea now, and leave you two." She walked into the other room and then to the kitchen. Meredith got up and went for her bag to get the present for Neville.

When she came back he was sitting on the sofa, so she sat next to him. Not too close, though. They exchanged gifts. "Open yours first," he said.

"No, you open yours."

"No, yours."

"Yours. _Please?_" She gave him a look that he couldn't refuse.

"Alright, mine first." He carefully undid the silver ribbon from the box and opened it. Out of the box he took a clear orb with a brass band circling it. Neville laughed loudly for the longest time. "Oh, I remember these. I had one when I was younger. Then I forgot it somewhere and lost it. And then I had another and lost that one too! I promise not to lose this one, though." The smoke inside the ball turned red. "Argh! The smoke always turns red! The trouble is, I can't remember what it is I've forgotten." He laughed again. "Thank you, Meredith. You know how I'm always forgetting things. Open yours now."

"Okay." Meredith opened her box and found some sort of leather contraption inside. "What is it?"

"It's an arm holster for your wand," Mrs. Longbottom said, coming into the room holding a white porcelain tea service with pink flowers painted all over it. She set it down on the coffee table. "Go on, try it."

Meredith pulled up her right sleeve and Neville helped her strap on the wand holster.

"Are you left-handed, dear?" Mrs. Longbottom asked.

"Yes," Meredith lied. As if she was going to pull up her left sleeve here! Then she took her wand from her back pocket, where she kept it hidden under her sweater. She slid the wand into the leather loops and tested out her mobility. The straps slanted in such a way that any part of the wand poking out above her forearm would be seen as part of her elbow. It stayed close to her body when she walked, so nobody would ever be able to tell she had a wand up her sleeve.

"Thank you. It's great," she said, rolling her sleeve down over her wand. This thing was awesome.

They had tea and small sandwiches, a light lunch. Then they shared stories about school, though never about Umbridge or the D.A. Mrs. Longbottom asked about Meredith's eyes, which by Mrs. Longbottom's reckoning were now a solid purple. Meredith explained the vampire incident, leaving out the usual parts of the story, the fact that she now drank fake blood, and what happened to her two days ago.

"Goodness, is it one o'clock already?" Mrs. Longbottom exclaimed as the grandfather clock on the wall chimed the time. "If you're to be back at Hogwarts by nightfall, we'd best be off now.

"How are we getting to Hogwarts?" Meredith asked. Apparating there couldn't take nearly the time between now and dusk.

"You two will be taking the Knight Bus from Diagon Alley. I simply am not up for Apparition anymore, and definitely not for bringing the both of you, or even one other person. The Knight Bus may take a bit more time, depending on how many stops are ahead of you, but it's faster than flying, and there is not a public Floo network in Hogsmeade. We will walk again to Diagon Alley. Get your coats."

Meredith went to the front room and put on her coat, hat, and scarf. Then she and the other two went outside and walked in the opposite direction they had come, and soon turned the corner onto another street lined with shops. Meredith saw a fancy candy shop and knew this might be her last chance to get something for her father.

"Can we stop here for a second?" she said. When Mrs. Longbottom nodded, Meredith went into the store and began looking around.

"May I help you find something?" a college-age boy wearing a store uniform asked her. Meredith told him (in her best British accent to avoid questions) what she was looking for and he quickly led her to it. While he rang up her purchase at the cash register, the clerk asked, "Are you an HP fan?"

"Yeah," Meredith replied.

"Nice. My favorite character is Snape. Who's yours?"

She didn't know if Neville was in the stories, so she said, "Mine's Snape too."

"That's cool. I like your contact lenses, by the way. Merry Christmas." He waved as she left the shop.

"Merry Christmas." That had gone very well. And it happened to have been her first real conversation with a Muggle since she left America. (The post office people last summer didn't count.) It was odd to think of it that way.

"A present for Dad," she explained to Neville and his grandmother. They continued on the walk to Diagon Alley.

In Diagon Alley, they went to a small stand—a hole in the wall, really—where a young wizard was sitting next to a wood stove, reading the _Daily Prophet_. Mrs. Longbottom went up to the booth and came back with tickets for the Knight Bus.

"The Alley's not wide enough for the bus, so we'll be going back to the Muggle street," she explained.

On the Muggle road, Mrs. Longbottom put out her right arm as if she was hailing a taxi. Half a second later, a bright blue double-decker bus appeared on the street with a loud bang.

A tall, skinny wizard with stringy brown hair and an unshaven face came to the door of the bus. "Welcome to the Knight Bus. My name is Stan Shunpike"—he tapped the name badge on his brown uniform— "and I will be your conductor this afternoon."

Mrs. Longbottom handed a ticket each to Neville and Meredith, who then boarded the bus. "Aren't you coming, Gran?" Neville called back.

"Oh, no, dear. I think you two should be fine riding alone. Besides, this bus and my stomach don't agree with each other anymore."

Stan Shunpike took their tickets and led them to a couple of armchairs in the middle of the first floor. Meredith looked up and saw a crystal chandelier hanging from the ceiling of the bus. _I hope it doesn't fall_, she thought. Other people on the bus were at the sides, far away from the chandelier.

"Take it away, Ern," Stan said, knocking on the window that separated the driver from the main compartment of the bus. The Knight Bus sped into action. They weaved through traffic…BOOM! They were somewhere completely different.

"So, where're you two headed?" Stan asked them.

"Hogwarts," Meredith replied, grabbing onto a pole in the center of the room to keep her chair from shifting. The sudden movements of the bus didn't seem to bother Stan. He was standing calmly, arms crossed, leaning against another pole.

He pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket. "Hogwarts, eh? That would make you seventh on the list." He jotted down something on the paper with a small pencil.

"I'll be coming back to London after that," Neville said.

Stan made another note on the paper. "London again. Alright. Well, looks like you two're gonna be on this bus for a while. Might as well make friends. Names?"

"Neville Longbottom."

Before Meredith could tell him her name, Stan got a curious look on his face. "Funny, a few years back, 'round summertime, a kid came here, said he was Neville Longbottom. Looked nothin' like you."

"What did he look like?"

"Oh, I dunno. Short, black hair, glasses, he had a trunk and a white owl, and he didn' know who Sirius Black was."

Meredith and Neville exchanged glances. They knew who Stan was talking about.

Stan ignored that Meredith hadn't told him her name, and asked, "You stayin' at Hogwarts over Christmas?"

"Yes," she replied.

"Spendin' the day with relatives?"

"No, not relatives."

"Then who is…oh, I see." Then Stan went over to open the door of the bus to let an old wizard out at his stop, and after that he was too busy dealing with motion-sick people to ask Meredith or Neville any more questions. Neither one of them got sick, which was good.

When their stop finally came, and the bus appeared with a BANG at the gate to the Hogwarts grounds, Meredith stood up from her chair and so did Neville. They hugged goodbye. "I'll see you when term starts," Meredith said in his ear. Then she got off the bus, walked to the gate, opened it, went inside, and heard the Knight Bus disappear with another BANG. But before that, she heard Stan comment to Neville when the door was still open, "Well you're a lucky lad, have such a sweet girlfriend."

Meredith's ears went red, but she didn't look back at where the bus had gone.

The bus had travelled fast, so when Meredith arrived at the castle, she still had a few hours left to kill. The first thing she did was go to her dormitory and take off her outdoor layers. She hung them on hangers to dry. Then she wrapped the present for her father and put it with the card. Finally, she went up to the Room of Requirement to learn a new song.

At six o'clock, Meredith headed back to Slytherin dungeon, wondering if she should change clothes into something more festive. Perhaps the Weasley sweater would upset her father.

She didn't end up changing clothes, but needed to pass the time until seven.

At six fifty-five, Meredith left her Defense Against the Dark Arts book on her bed, grabbed the gift for her father, and headed out of the Slytherin dorms to her father's classroom. The door was open when she got there, but nobody was in the room, so she went to knock on the office door. Before her knuckles hit the wood the door was opened by the potions master himself. Meredith didn't know why, but she had been expecting to see a few other professors there for a party. There were none.

"Come in," Severus told his daughter. He closed the door behind her as she set down the present on his desk next to a plainly wrapped box not unlike the one she had received last Christmas, only slightly larger.

They ate dinner first, in an awkward silence. Meredith tried to lighten the mood by smiling all she could, but it wasn't working. She could tell her father felt uncomfortable, and that he just wanted to get up and say, "I can't do this! I'm a horrible father! I'm sorry!" But Severus Snape kept his cool, though Meredith could see how hard it was.

After supper, the two exchanged gifts. "Hold on," Meredith said. She took out her wand, cleared her mind and created a small Christmas tree growing out of the side of the wooden table. She was rather proud of herself for creating such a big complex plant on a whim. Her father looked even more stunned.

"I did not know you were able to do that."

"Yeah?" She added some shining red poinsettias next to the little pine, which was already filling the room with its warm fresh scent. "I've known how to create flowers for a year now." Her dream about Neville and the flowers flashed through her mind.

"I must say, I am very impressed. Students do not learn to conjure things until the NEWT level, I believe. Very good." He looked from the flowers to her. "Open yours first."

"No, you open yours first." _Again?_

"No, you."

"No, you. Pleeease?"

"Alright, alright." After reading the card, he unwrapped his gift and pulled out of the box a sphere wrapped in red and gold-colored foil. He looked confused. "What is it?"

"It's a chocolate orange. A Muggle thing. In America, we had one every Christmas and we would split it with the whole family. I figured it would be nice to continue the tradition with my new family."

"Thank you," Severus said. Following the directions on the label, he very uncharacteristically whacked the orange hard. Then he opened it and shared it with Meredith.

It tasted like home. Like Christmases spent laughing loudly in front of a roaring fire late into the night. It tasted like her older sister's jokes, her mom's falsely scolding voice as she told everybody to calm down before someone died from lack of oxygen, late nights spent wishing Santa would bring snow…

"Meredith?"

"Hmm?" She inwardly shuddered. It was odd to hear her father say her name. Mostly because it made her remember a certain book she had read without his permission.

"It is your turn now."

"Right." She unwrapped the brown paper, opened the box inside, and found…

She wasn't sure what this was. It looked like a tiny piano, but it didn't make any sound when she pressed on the keys. The thing was broken also. The back leg was totally snapped off, and the top was chipped and cracked. Meredith didn't understand. Why would her father give her a broken figurine?"

Severus took the tiny piano from Meredith's confused hands and turned it upside down. He wound a crank, and set it right side up on the table.

The music that came forth from the music box was deeper than any Meredith had ever heard. In only a few short measures, it conveyed a sense of longing, sadness, love, and finally, joy. Meredith had never heard the likes of it, and when it stopped, she was left wishing to hear more; she wanted it to play at least ten more times.

Her father broke the silence. "This was your mother's. She wrote the tune and made this herself, shortly after we were married. She always intended for you to have it, and now you shall.

Was that sadness in his eyes? Or regret, as there was so often? Or something different?

Meredith remembered reading something in her mother's diary about a music box being almost finished, but she had never thought much of it. "Why is it broken?"

"I believe she threw it to the floor when she was very upset one day, a few months before you were born. She never got around to fixing it."

_She died before she could_, was what he didn't say. Meredith hated when they got to these touchy subjects. There was another long, more morose silence. Meredith broke it with an attempt at a cheerful, "Merry Christmas, Dad."

They talked for another half hour about how things went at St. Mungo's, and how school was. It was difficult to keep the conversation going with not much to talk about.

Meredith noticed that during the whole thing, her father seemed uneasy about something. He never smiled—not that she had ever seen him truly smile before—and he kept glancing at his desk.

"Dad?"

"Yes?"

"Why did mom die?" Meredith could tell this was one of those questions her father didn't like answering.

He swallowed visibly, and took a drink from his goblet. Meredith didn't know what was in it. Then Severus spoke, "She didn't want any help. She was so happy to have you in her arms that she didn't feel any pain. We told her she was bleeding out, but she said no, that everything was fine. And by the time she began to notice her strength wavering, by the time she was in pain again, and we managed to convince her to take the blood-replenishing potion, it was too late to help her, and she was gone in another minute."

Silence for a _long_ time.

"Dad?"

"Yes?"

"When is your birthday?"

"The ninth of January. Please do not get anything for me."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Very sure." Then he murmured, "The only thing I could ever wish for is dead." Meredith pretended she hadn't heard him, though she did, and she knew the dead person he meant was not Talitha.

"Dad?"

"Yes?"

"When is Mom's birthday?"

"The thirtieth of March."

"Okay." She was running out of questions to ask to keep the conversation going. Boy, this was turning out to be an awkward Christmas. Meredith was grateful all the same. It could be much worse. What would have happened if she had never made amends with her father and remained an outcast in the Weasley family? What would have happened if Lord Voldemort had never told her who her father was, and then her father chickened out for the rest of the school year? Come to think of it, would unsaid remaining tensions between them be any better if Severus had told his daughter himself earlier in the year? She wasn't ready for the truth when it came, so why would she have been ready for it before that?

"Dad?"

"Yes?"

Any normal father would have said _Yes, Meredith?_ she thought. But despite this, she decided to ask the forbidden question. "Dad, if you still had a crush on Lily, and I know you did, then why did you marry…Talitha?" It was the first time she had ever said her mother's name out loud, and for the first time she realized how beautiful the name was.

Severus Snape took a deep breath. "I knew I could never have Lily. She was already with Potter. And after that day when I called her a…you-know-what…things were never the same. I decided to move on with my life, so I sought out Talitha, who, as you read, had apparently been obsessed with me since our sixth year, and I asked her to marry me and that was that. You know the rest of the story."

"But you never got over Lily."

He took another deep breath. "No. And I went back to my old ways once I learned she was in danger."

"Why did you ever marry Mom if you were still in love with someone else? You didn't mean to make her jealous, did y—"

"That is…far too many questions for one day." He was struggling to keep his composure.

Meredith lowered her head. "Sorry."

"Quite alright. It is natural, of course, that you should want to know all of this. Now is simply not the time. Now is the time for you to be off to your dormitory, as it is getting late." He stood, and she did too, picking up the music box from the table.

She walked silently to the door with her father, and stood there.

Meredith hugged her father. "Merry Christmas, Dad."

"Merry Christmas, my daughter. Good night."

And she was out the door, ambling along to the empty Slytherin dormitory, where she lay in bed listening to her mother's song for hours.

* * *

**Kudos to you if your name is Talitha. Hope you liked the chapter. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed or favorited or whatever else. Keep it up! -Violet**


	15. Meeting the Werewolf

Chapter Fifteen: Meeting the Werewolf

The rest of Christmas vacation passed by quickly. Meredith spent time in the Room of Requirement and out on the grounds tramping through the snow just because she could. The castle was practically empty, so she could do practically anything she wanted to, provided that Umbridge wasn't looking.

She kept the music box in the Room of Requirement, on top of the real piano, and listened to it whenever frustration or sadness or some unknown feeling bigger than all the rest overtook her. This unknown emotion made her heart beat quickly and feel like it would spill over; it made her think of cool sunny days by the lake; and yet it was so unfamiliar that it confused her, and at times frightened her. She didn't know what to call it. And she didn't know who to talk to about it either.

On the sixth of January, Meredith got a message on the charmed Sickle: _My office 9:30._

She had no idea what could be happening, but she went anyway, a few minutes early.

"Today we will be going to see the Dark Lord again. Put on your…costume. Wear something warm over it," Severus said from the ingredients cupboard.

"Okay." Meredith left to go change.

The corset was tight as ever, but Meredith noticed that she had to loosen it a little near the top. Her underclothes had been becoming a bit uncomfortable too.

When she was finally done arranging the dress and putting on some dark mascara and purple eye shadow just for effect, Meredith looked herself over in the full-length mirror in the lavatory.

She looked like a slightly gothic daughter of Severus Snape.

So she washed off some of the makeup and looked again. Perfect. She still hoped none of her friends or teachers would ever see her like this. But it truly was a pretty dress. And it helped that her body looked less like an eight-year-old's now.

Terrific. All dressed up to go meet Voldemort.

They Disapparated just outside the gates of Hogwarts. A path had been cleared of snow so teachers and students staying at Hogwarts could go to Hogsmeade.

The house in front of them looked like a normal home on a normal London street, except the passersby didn't seem to even notice it was there.

Severus rang the bell and turned to Meredith. "Professor Dumbledore wishes for me to give Occlumency lessons to Potter beginning Monday to help him shut out the strange dreams he has been having. We are here to tell him that. The Weasleys and a few others are here as well. This is the headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix."

Molly Weasley opened the door. "Severus, we were expecting you. And you've brought Meredith with you! Oh, hello, dear, come in, please!"

"I must speak with Potter, Molly. We can't stay for long."

"Oh, well let me go get him. He's probably upstairs with Ron and Hermione. You can talk in the kitchen. Do you need to speak privately?"

"Yes, please."

"Then go on to the kitchen; Meredith can stay in the sitting room with the others."

Meredith thought it was odd to have two of her families here. This was the woman she still referred to as Mum, and this was the man she called Dad. Yet the two of them were in no way related.

Severus went off on his own while Mrs. Weasley led Meredith to a large room with ornate carpets and wallpaper. "Meredith, may I introduce Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, and Nymphadora Tonks. I do believe Tonks may be related to. Anyway, I should go get Harry. Make yourself at home, dear." She left.

Meredith slowly walked forward into the room and took a seat on a faded flower print sofa. On an opposite couch sat a girl with pink hair, and a tired-looking man. She had dressed up for this?

"Wotcher, cuz," Tonks said.

"Um, what?"

"Talitha was your mum, right?"

"Yeah."

"Well, my mum is her sister, Andromeda. So you're my cousin."

"Really? What a relief."

"Why?"

"I thought I only had one cousin, Draco Malfoy, and he's an evil brat. It's nice to know I have family not on the Dark Side."

The man sitting next to Tonks laughed. "Yes, knowing your family, I suppose it would be nice to know that not all your relatives have the Dark Mark on their left arms."

Meredith was suddenly very conscious of the fact that these were only three-quarter length sleeves, and anybody who was looking could see the Mark there. She crossed her arms over her chest, and turned to Tonks again. "I like your hair. It's a cool style you have."

"Thanks. Your style is…interesting too."

"Believe me, I don't normally wear this stuff. It's too olden-days."

"Why are you wearing it then?"

"I don't really know. My dad told me I had to today. I guess we're going somewhere."

Tonks seemed to take the hint. "Oh. Well, it looks nice on you. Are your eyes _purple_?"

"Yeah. They were blue, but—"

"You're not human." Lupin said it quickly and unexpectedly. Meredith started noticing things about this man: the way he arched his back as if he was about to spring up, the intense glare of his eyes, she even half-expected him to snarl.

"Neither are you. What are you?" She was a little afraid.

"Werewolf. And you are a vampire. What kind of madness is this? Snivellus sends in his vampire daughter. Now the question is, does he expect her to murder us right here, or turn us all into vampires? I knew Dumbledore shouldn't have trusted him—" He stood up, but Tonks held him back.

"Hypocrite," Meredith said.

"What?"

"I said, you're a hypocrite. Don't tell me werewolves aren't discriminated against too, just like vampires. I'm not here to murder you or suck your blood or bite you or anything like that. All I know is that my dad is here to talk to Harry!"

Lupin calmed down and sat on the sofa again. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I feel this way. The full moon isn't for another few weeks."

"Are werewolves and vampires enemies naturally?" Meredith asked.

"No. Of course not. We leave each other alone."

So Twilight was wrong again. Plus, this guy didn't look at all like he would be in Twilight. _That_ was a funny image.

"Well, I didn't know you were a vampire, Meredith, but I remember when your eyes were blue," Sirius Black said, striding toward the door.

"Hello, Mr. Black."

"Please, call me Sirius." He left the room quickly.

"So, how did you get bitten?" Lupin asked Meredith.

"This summer I was in the woods with Dad and they just came and surrounded us and I refused to go with them so they…yeah. I took the antidote, so I'm technically not _full_ vampire, but I do drink fake blood once in a while. How did you get bitten?"

Before Lupin could answer, a shout rang through the house, "Daddy's back!" It was Mrs. Weasley. Footsteps thudded down the stairs.

Mr. Weasley walked into the doorway. "Completely cured!" he exclaimed. "Hello, Remus, Tonks, Meredith." He went to another room.

A minute later, Severus Snape swept into the doorway of the room. "We're leaving. Now," he said to Meredith, and he headed towards the front door of the house.

"Well, goodbye. It was nice meeting you," Meredith said, standing.

"You too, cuz. Take care."

"Yes, goodbye."

Meredith left the house and Disapparated with her father, thinking all the time about how much worse werewolves had it.

They were outside the gates of an ancient mansion covered in vines. Meredith looked up at the imposing building while her father said the password and opened the gate. They went inside, closing the iron gate behind them, and entered the house. After an eternity of creaky stairs and keeping away from the cobwebbed crumbling banisters, Severus knocked on an old wooden door.

"Who is there?" a voice said from the room behind the door.

"It is I, Severus Snape, and my daughter, Meredith Snape."

"Enter." Voldemort said it this time.

The two walked into a wide room with peeling paint on the walls and ashes in the fireplace. Lord Voldemort stood from a large armchair in the center of the room, and greeted them. "Ah, the Snape family. There were no…_incidents_ on your way here, I trust."

"No, my lord," Severus said.

"Very well. Amycus, Severus, if you will both kindly step outside for one moment, I wish to speak with Miss Meredith alone first."

Meredith met her father's gaze before he left, and she thought she saw worry in his eyes for one second.

When the door had closed, Lord Voldemort turned to face Meredith completely. Then he began a slow walk around the room. "This house was once the home of my father, Thomas Riddle Senior. It was tended by a Muggle caretaker named Frank Bryce until last year, when I adopted this place as a shelter for my not yet restored body, and I disposed of the old man.

"You have told me everything in dreams, Miss Meredith Snape. But is there anything you would care to explain further? Or, perhaps, is there something new you wish to tell me?"

"No, not really." She paused. "My lord," she added quickly.

"Hmm. Pity. I should very much like to know more about your…friends." He smiled. Well, more sneered than smiled.

_Occlumency. Don't forget occlumency,_ Meredith had to remind herself. "What do you want to know?"

"I must say, I was very intrigued by your relationship with a particular Gryffindor boy, a friend of yours. Leave Potter out of the picture for a moment."

"There's nothing."

"_Crucio_." Meredith doubled over in pain. "I will not tolerate being lied to, Miss Meredith," Voldemort said almost sweetly. "Now tell me the _truth_." At the last word, she was flung across the room, bashed into the wall, and crumpled to the floor. She blinked away dust and tears.

"I _have_ told you the truth!" Meredith shouted across the room, standing up. "I told you everything I know. Why do you even want to know about me and him anyway?"

"Forgive me, Miss Snape. I lost my temper." He waved his wand and all of the dust came off Meredith's clothes. "You must explain this phenomenon to me. This phenomenon which destroyed my powers long ago. This phenomenon which I have never known, nor will I ever know. This phenomenon I believe you can explain to me quite clearly. This phenomenon called _love_."

She shook her head. "I don't get it either, Tom. But from other sources, I have gathered that love is when you care _so much _about someone…that you never ever want to lose them." Meredith realized she needed to analyze her feelings about one specific person again.

"I still do not understand. How can one _care_ at all in this _disgusting_ world? You may go. Send in your father."

Severus's talk with Lord Voldemort was short. Meredith was glad of this because the Death Eater waiting outside the door with her made her very uncomfortable.

Finally, they Apparated back to Hogwarts and the day was boring again.

But not quite so boring for Meredith. She changed back into normal clothes, grabbed her diary, and went up to the Room of Requirement. Sitting on the piano bench, she wrote:

_January 6, 2013 11:05 PM_

_Today we went to the headquarters of the Order and we went to meet with You-Know-Who in this old falling-apart house. It was bizarre. And it hurt. I got crucioed and flung across the room. I think I might have a bruise on my shoulder. Anyway, at headquarters (that sounds so fancy and official!) I met a werewolf, no kidding, and another cousin of mine. Neither of those two are evil. Tonks has pink hair! I wonder how she does it, because the roots don't look like they're any natural color. It's just all pink. And she doesn't strike me as someone who spends twelve hours a day doing her hair in front of the mirror. Maybe she just dyed it this morning._

_So the real reason I'm writing this is because Lord Voldemort wants me to explain to him what exactly love is. So I was all like, "Honestly, dude, I don't know for myself. You've been around longer, so you should know something about it, right?" But I didn't say it that way. I told him that love is when you care so much about someone that you never ever want to lose them. I think that's pretty accurate, but that's just me._

_So before that, he was asking me about my "relationship" with Neville because he saw the dream sequences (which also means I've told him everything I know about Harry. I'm such a spy! I hate being a spy!). He wanted me to explain my relationship in order to explain to him what love is. That's kinda stupid. I mean, it's crazy. How could I possibly be in l_

She shut her diary, put away the quill and ink, and calmed herself down by playing one of her favorite pieces on the piano. She played and played, piece after piece, full volume, never singing. Music was her escape from confusing things.

But there was no escaping this.

* * *

**Mr. Clarinetist, you are automatically switched characters because the author is getting weirded out by her own thoughts.**


	16. In Nightmares

Chapter Sixteen: In Nightmares / Happy Sweet Sixteen, Meredith

January passed quickly once classes began again. Mid-month, a few Death Eaters, including Bellatrix Lestrange escaped form Azkaban Prison and were out on the loose. Meredith knew this bothered Neville especially because of what Bellatrix had done to his parents. The day the news came about the prisoners' escape, Meredith felt terrible, even to the point of having to step out of a class where everyone was talking about it. Every time she spoke with Neville for the next week, she had to hold back tears. She started wishing again that she could secede from her family.

And yet it made her so curious about what her mother had been like. Surely Talitha hadn't been like Bellatrix or Narcissa. Meredith was convinced that Talitha was like Tonks's mother Andromeda, kind enough to be on the good side. But there hadn't been much about sides in Talitha's diary. And when there was any information on the "war" it was about Severus and what he was doing; no opinions or comments by Talitha.

In early February, the dreams started coming again. At first they were just "Tell me what you know, Miss Meredith," and "How are you, Miss Meredith?" but they gradually got scarier and scarier. Each one began the normal way (when had this become normal?) with her and Neville.

"Hello, Tom."

"Any news about Harry Potter?"

"He had a strange dream the other night that Mr. Weasley was attacked by a giant snake, and it turned out to be true. Mr. Weasley is alright, though. The healers got to him in time, and now he's completely recovered. It was your snake, wasn't it? Nagini? Why were you there?"

"Yes. There is something at the Ministry that I very much need—"

"A prophecy. My father told me. The Order of the Phoenix is protecting it."

"And now you have answered your own question as to why we were there."

"Right. But why did Nagini attack him?"

"You know the answer." He paused. "I believe there may be a connection between the minds of Harry Potter and I. He sees what I see. He feels what I feel."

"But that was the snake."

"Nagini is a part of me."

"So she's a horcrux?"

Tom gave a knowing smile. Meredith decided to change the subject.

"So why didn't you ask me this back in January in person?"

"I had more urgent questions then."

Meredith internally rolled her eyes and clenched her teeth. Then she woke up and it was morning.

The next night, the dreams truly turned into nightmares.

There was the "normal" beginning, and Tom appeared.

"I would like for you to see something, Miss Meredith, and tell me what you think."

She was in a dark room with lots of shelves filled with glowing orbs of blue smoke. Tonks was there, just standing. Then there was Voldemort in his current, snakelike no-nose form. "Hand me the prophecy," he said.

"You'll have to kill me," Tonks replied calmly.

"_Crucio_." Tonks's body contorted in agony. She was visibly trying to throw off the curse.

Meredith was back with Tom Riddle, shaking all over. "You're a bad man," she said. The fury came into Tom's eyes like it had a few dreams before.

She felt pain everywhere and woke up screaming.

Someone poked her hard in the arm, and she majorly flinched, yelling again as she tangled herself in her sheets and fell out of bed. She thrashed around for a second before realizing that the room was light and everyone was awake staring at her.

Meredith untangled herself from the sheets and got up as quickly as possible. "Uh, bad dream," she explained, re-arranging the blankets in a pile on her bed. "I'm going to the bathroom."

On her way out the door, she heard Pansy Parkinson say, "That girl has to go. First she threatens to suck our blood and now she wakes us all up by screaming. What a freak."

Meredith closed the dormitory door and ran, barefoot in her pajamas, to her father's office. On the way, she took the fake Sickle out of her pocket and messaged him:

_YOUR OFFICE. QUICK!_

A cell phone might have been much more convenient, because she could have called him instead of texted, but this would have to do.

Meredith ran down a few staircases and sprinted into the potions classroom. She flung open the door to her father's office and stood there for a second.

Her father was sitting at his desk, looking at her with a concerned expression on his face. He was fully dressed in day clothes, as if he had been teaching a class this whole time.

He stood up as she entered the room. Meredith then broke down crying, covering her face with her hands. She felt so weak and so stupid and so helpless. Weak because she was crying over a nightmare; stupid because Tom had managed to convince her that he was nice; helpless because she couldn't control her own mind anymore.

Her father walked over to her and hugged her. She sobbed into his shoulder for a few minutes.

When she was calm enough to let go, she wiped her cheeks with her palms. They came away bloody. Meredith was crying blood. Blood was coming from her eyes.

Her father handed her a tissue and she cleaned up a bit. "A side effect of drinking the false blood," he explained. "You can keep drinking it. If you don't, your thirst for real blood will only grow stronger, and that would not be pleasant for anyone. See, it's not so bad to cry blood. It certainly is a bit messier, but you can clean up in the lavatory. Now, tell me what happened."

She told him about Tom Riddle interrupting her dreams (though she didn't say what the dream had always been about). She told him about telling Tom everything because he seemed so kind and understanding of her problems. She admitted to how wrong she had been, ending with the terrifying dream about Tonks being tortured.

"Do you think it was real?" she asked.

"No. Tonks is not on duty tonight, and would have no reason to be there. I think the Dark Lord is testing on you what he will use on Potter in the near future."

"But why Tonks?"

"He is testing how people react when a family member is in danger."

"But why not you?"

"The Dark Lord may replace Tonks with anyone in these visions. Tell me whenever you have another one of these nightmares. Any other questions?"

"Yeah, actually."

"And what is that?"

"Do you _ever_ sleep?"

* * *

The day after the first nightmare, Meredith spent all day in the Room of Requirement. She sang and sang some more. She sang until she was too tired, and then spent some time reading her Defense Against the Dark Arts book. She had just started reading the chapter about dementors and how to ward them off. She wanted to learn how to cast a Patronus charm. She said the words in the Room of Requirement, but nothing happened. She would need to ask someone for help on that.

* * *

_Not about Meredith:_

The day after his daughter had the first nightmare, Severus Snape went to the headmaster to ask his opinion of what was going on and what should be done.

"Well, Severus, I believe this is quite serious. Meredith may have given Lord Voldemort the key to Harry Potter's mind. You have been teaching him Occlumency?"

"Yes, Headmaster. Though the boy lacks any sort of skill."

"And has Meredith been using Occlumency?"

"She told me that she had been, but always the Dark Lord manages to enter her mind."

"I need more explanation as to how these dreams begin. Do they begin with a normal dream sequence, or does the talk with Voldemort begin right away?"

"She did not say anything about the beginning of these dreams, only the main content. I could bring her here to explain if—"

"No, Severus. We must leave her be right now."

"Where is she?" Suddenly he became worried and protective. She couldn't be with _Longbottom_, could she?

"Meredith is in the Room of Requirement."

"The Room of Requirement?"

"Yes. The Room of Requirement is a wondrous room, Severus. It is, and has been for a long time, a place for students to hide their secrets, their actions, and themselves. It is a place of sanctuary from the world, and a safe house currently for one little girl whose tears turn to blood in her eyes. Lemon drop?"

"She hides there? From whom? With whom?" He was protective again.

"I believe we both know from whom she hides, Severus. From you and I, but also from herself. With whom? Nobody but her own voice, and that is a beautiful voice, Severus. Have you ever heard your daughter sing?"

This surprised him. "No… I have not. And you have?"

"Music is a magic as great as love. When a power like that is present in my school, I am very aware of it."

"I want to hear."

"You will, Severus, in time."

* * *

_Back to Meredith:_

The next day, Sunday, Meredith met with Neville in the library.

"Hey, Neville," she greeted him as she sat down across from him at their usual table. She felt as if a fist were squeezing her heart.

"Hey, Meredith. Why weren't you here yesterday?"

"I was practicing piano in the Room of Requirement," she said more quietly.

"That's interesting. All day?"

"Yeah. So, Neville, do you know anything about Patronus charms?"

"Not much. Only that you have to think of something really happy and then cast it and it'll protect you. Harry would be a better person to ask about specifics. He can cast a full-bodied Patronus."

"Hmm. Yeah, maybe I'll ask him about it at the next D.A. meeting."

They studied in silence for a while.

"Meredith, are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine. Why?"

He went back to writing. "You just seem really tired, is all."

_Tired?_ She was exhausted! She had lain awake in her bed from midnight to five in the morning, unable to go to sleep again. Why?

Because the last nightmare had been about Neville.

She feared sleeping for the next few weeks. Even using all the tricks her father had taught her about closing off her mind before sleeping didn't work. Tom entered her mind in the dreamscape, and it never began with the dream about her and Neville anymore.

Different people came every night in these dreamscapes: Lupin, Tonks, Mr. Weasley, Mrs. Weasley, Dumbledore, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Neville, and (only a few times) herself. Each time she had the dream, she would message her father with the fake Sickle:

NIGHTMARE. IT WAS [insert name of whoever it was]

She never told any of her friends about the nightmares so as not to worry them.

"It's a nice day out. Let's go sit by the lake or something," Meredith yawned one Saturday afternoon in early February. She wanted to see if the flowers she had planted last year had survived the winter, and maybe she would create new ones and Neville would give them names…

She let go of that thought very quickly.

They sat under the same tree they had back in October, and helped one another with essays. When they had finished, there were still a few hours of daylight left, so they sat for a while with their backs against the tree trunk, always eight inches from each other in case Umbridge came by.

"Neville, do you ever wonder what it would be like to live in the wilderness?"

"No, not really. I suppose it would be cold, though, especially in winter. Why do you ask?"

"No reason. I was just thinking about random things."

"Oh. Okay." He paused for a second. "Meredith, do you…do you, um…"

_What is he going to say?_ A thousand predictions ran through her mind.

"Do you ever wish you could just get away from all this? All the bad stuff?"

"All the time. But I know I can't just leave. I learned that last year after the third task; running away doesn't help anything." _Why did I run?_ She asked herself. The further away the past became, the more Meredith noticed how immature she had been. She may not be Harry Freaking Only-Hope-In-The-World Potter, but she had a difference to make. The Sorting Hat said so. She couldn't drop everything and leave. "What about you?"

"I've thought about it. But doesn't every kid think about running away sometime in their life? I can't leave either. There's too much for me here that I would be leaving behind."

She wished he would add 'Like you,' to the end of that sentence. An unfamiliar ache entered her heart and she once more felt a rush of overpowering emotion. She was still in denial that this was Lord Voldemort said it was. How should he know anyway? Or maybe he was watching every moment of Meredith's life through her eyes and hearing everything through her ears and sensing every emotion her insane heart pumped out. But Voldemort couldn't be _that_ stalker-ish, could he? Meredith searched her mind for another presence and found none.

To break the silence, Meredith took her fife out of her pocket and played a tune she had learned on the piano while in her frenzy of denial. It would have sounded better played loudly and gallantly on a grand piano, but it sounded nice on fife too.

* * *

It was difficult to live with hardly any sleep. Sometimes she was lucky and didn't have strange dreams when she fell asleep studying. Other times she wasn't so lucky and the Baron would wake her up because he knew when she started tossing in her chair that the screaming would start soon enough.

Being sleep-deprived all the time was taking its toll on Meredith. More than once she fell asleep in History of Magic and was lucky to not have nightmares. Cho Chang let her copy the notes, even though Meredith didn't ever tell her why she was always so tired. Cho Chang was a good friend, aside from the fact that she was unhappy all the time. Meredith was glad that Cho let her get away with dozing off in class. Hermione would have woken her in a heartbeat.

And then there was Umbridge. People said that in detention, she made you write lines with a special quill that used your blood as ink and carved your words into the back of the hand you weren't writing with. Meredith never got detention because she never got caught doing anything wrong. She was an obedient Slytherin, and was therefore viewed by Umbridge as a superb student and by the rest of the school as a goody two-shoes teacher's pet.

Meredith's birthday came and almost went uneventfully, and with it a holiday that Meredith deemed as overkill. Though in a way, she was a little disappointed. After Potions, which was right before lunch, Meredith's father indicated for her to stay after class for a moment.

"Happy birthday," he said in a lighter tone once everyone had left. From behind his lectern he took a black guitar case.

Meredith took it, her eyes wide and her mouth open in astonishment. "Thank you, Dad."

"Go on, play something."

Meredith set the case on the table and slowly opened it. The body of the guitar inside was a solid shining black with a ring of purple around the sound hole. Meredith had never seen a guitar in these colors before. Even the one in the Room of Requirement was just plain wood.

She slung the plum-colored strap over her shoulder and adjusted it for comfort. Then she played a short piece of an American song. She wanted to sing it, but again found that she just _couldn't_. She could sing all by herself, but not around other people. Completely normal, or so she supposed. It was like mini stage fright.

"You are very good at that," Severus commented.

"Thanks." If she didn't have much homework, she was going outside to play guitar later.

"You are welcome. How have you been sleeping?"

Meredith sighed and put the guitar back in its case. "Not well. I think that all the girls in my dormitory think I'm just more of a freak" –Severus flinched— "now. So I've been spending a lot of time in a corner of the common room and the Bloody Baron wakes me up before I start screaming."

"You are friends with the Baron?" Meredith nodded. "Really? I did not know the Baron could ever befriend anybody."

"I think it's a sort of comfort to him to see the Grey Lady's look-alike alive."

"The Grey Lady. Hmm. Well, surely you wish to go spend time with your friends."

"Ih. I guess. I'm sort of hungry too." She picked up the guitar case. "Thanks again, Dad. You really don't know how much this means to me." He truly didn't. This meant that Meredith could practice music even when she wasn't at Hogwarts.

"I'm glad you are happy with it." Severus really was happy that Meredith was happy. But deep down he knew that no amount of anti-venom and no number of musical instruments could make up for what he had done and what she was now going through.

Meredith put the guitar in her dormitory and went to the Great Hall for lunch.

After classes, she went to the library and met a smiling Neville.

"What?" she asked. After all, he was just _standing there_ grinning like he knew something she didn't.

"I've got a surprise for you. Meet me by the lake in ten minutes."

"Okay." She thought for a minute. "I've got a surprise for you too. I'll see you there." She turned on her heel and walked back out of the library.

In her dormitory, Meredith took her new guitar out of its case and slung it across her back. Than she filled her school bag with all the homework due in the next two days and left for the lakeside, hoping that she didn't get caught by Umbridge because according to a new Educational Decree, "No musical instruments are to be played." It was a stupid rule, and it didn't make the castle a whole lot quieter.

By taking a few secret ways she learned from Fred and George, Meredith got out of the castle without meeting anyone, and that included the little cupids someone had charmed to fly around the castle sprinkling glitter on everyone. Meredith was relieved that she didn't accidentally walk in on any couples kissing in those secret passageways. It _was _Valentine's Day.

When she reached the lake, Meredith found Neville sitting by the flowers. "There you are," he said, still smiling. "Are you ready for your birthday surprise?"

"Sure. What is it?"

"Just watch." Neville raised his wand and waved it in one great sweep in front of him. Old leaves, rocks, twigs, anything on the ground rose into the air and flew into formation over the lake until it read "Happy Birthday Meredith." Then the whole thing was transformed into lavender and white flower petals that soared in a line back to land, circled Meredith twice, and flew once more over the lake, gathering into one big glob that resembled a face surrounded by long hair. And the whole thing burst into a shower of petals that all floated away on the lake's surface.

"Oh, Neville. That was beautiful."

"Thanks. I spent a while putting it together. Happy birthday."

"Thank you."

"Now you said you had a surprise too?"

"Yeah." She swung the guitar around to her front. "Dad gave this to me this morning, so I thought I might play some." She made sure the tuning was right, sat down on the grass, and began to play.

Neville sat down beside her and listened. When she had finished, he smiled and stated, "Wow. Fife, piano, and now guitar. You never do cease to amaze, Meredith."

Meredith couldn't help reddening at the comment. She also noticed that they were less than eight inches apart, and her blush deepened. _Oh, well_, she thought. _I guess my face needs a little color anyway._

"Do you sing too?"

"Some. But only in the Room of Requirement. Alone."

"Oh. I was going to suggest that you join Flitwick's choir, but I guess not." He looked out at the lake. "We should probably start working on homework, huh?"

"Yeah."

Meredith worked quickly to finish the essays she had. When she was done, she went down to the very edge of the water and laid down on the cool gravel, looking at the sky. She played some of the Muggle songs she missed most, and hummed softly along with some.

The day was very warm for February, and the sun made her incredibly sleepy…

She was walking through rows and rows of shelves filled with little orbs with blue clouds inside.

"_Tell me_," a whisper chanted all around her. "_Tell me. Tell me. Tell me._" And Lord Voldemort was standing in front of her. "_Tell me. Explain to me what love is._"

Voldemort disappeared and Neville was at her side, holding her hand. What was he saying? "_Don't be afraid, Meredith. Everything will be fine_." He hugged her tightly.

Voldemort's voice was in her head again. "_Oh, the images your mind conjures, Miss Snape. How…touching._"

Neville fell to the floor, screaming in pain as Voldemort tortured him. "_Stop it!_" Meredith yelled. "_Stop it!_" She held onto the mental image of the two of them locked in an embrace and imagined how she would never let go.

And there was Neville, hugging her again. That image switched on and off with one of him sprawled on the floor bleeding.

_No,_ Meredith thought hard, resisting the sad picture Voldemort was trying to force into her dream. "No!" she said aloud. "Stop it! It's not going to be that way! Go away!"

"Meredith. Meredith!" someone else was saying. She was being shaken awake.

"What?!" she yelled, her eyes open wide. She was back on the lakeside, and Neville was leaning over her, concerned.

"Are you okay?"

"Wh-why? Was I screaming?"

"No, but you were shouting things like 'stop it' and 'go away'."

"Bad dream. I guess I fell asleep." She was breathing fast.

She sat up and hugged Neville tightly, burying her face into the shoulder of his soft sweater-vest.

"That really must've been some nightmare," Neville said, hugging her back.

"Uh-huh."

"You know, they say that if you tell someone about a bad dream, it will never come true."

"I know. But I can't say. I wish that I could tell you, but that would only make them scare me more."

"So this is the reason why you're tired all the time?"

"Yes. I get nightmares almost every night now. But somehow I think this one was different."

"How so?"

"I said stuff instead of just screaming bloody murder, and I think I controlled some of what happened."

"I suppose that's good."

"Yeah. Sort of."

They stayed in a tight embrace for a few more minutes until both of them pulled away at the same time. Correction: Meredith sensed Neville starting to pull away, so she did the same. The rocks were becoming uncomfortable to sit on anyway.

Meredith picked up her new guitar from the ground beside her, where she assumed Neville had put it while trying to wake her up. She stood and went back to the tree, sitting and leaning her head against the trunk. She felt more tired than she had ever felt in her life, including that one time she stayed awake for 48 hours straight and was still unable to get any sleep. Resisting Voldemort's power over her mind sure had left her drained. She closed her eyes for a moment, but opened them again right away. She needed to get to the Room of Requirement before she fell asleep again. Meredith grabbed her school bag and got up to leave.

"Where are you going?"

"Room of Requirement. I can't stay awake for much longer."

"Maybe you could get a dreamless sleep potion on your way there."

"Right." Though she doubted the potion could keep Lord freaking Voldemort out of her head. "Bye."

"Bye. And happy birthday."

Meredith forced a smile and headed off towards the castle, where she immediately climbed the stairs to the seventh floor and slept in the Room of Requirement until morning. She had no nightmares.

* * *

**8/21/12- Hey! School starts tomorrow, which is why I'm posting two chapters today. I don't have chapter 17 typed yet, and I'm currently writing chapter 18. Chapter 17 is interesting, I promise. But I'm not going to post it until I get more reviews than there are chapters! (And even then, you might have to wait until I have time.) Schoolwork always comes first, so I don't know when I'll be able to type up, edit, and post the next chapter. Hopefully I don't have an overwhelming amount of homework during the first week.**

**I love reviews! And I think I've set it to accept guest reviews, so even if you don't have an account, you can leave a note. Thanks for reading! Nam****á****ri****ë****!**

**-Violet**

**PS: I know that now there are more reviews than chapters (thanks to meapinghorse. clap. clap.) but it still might be a little while. How about meanwhile, we review The Horrid Truth! Shooting for thirty reviews to each story. Hope that's not unrealistic.**


	17. Meredith Analyzes Her Life Again

Chapter Seventeen: Meredith's Analyzes Her Life Again

_March 20, 2013, 3:47 AM_

_Just felt like writing right now, since I have nothing better to do other than cry over the last nightmare. It was Neville again. These are the ones that scare me the most. I haven't managed to control another nightmare since that one time. I don't know why. I try as hard as I can, but still, my thoughts aren't strong enough to push out the thoughts Voldemort tries to put into my head. It's frustrating. _

_So lately I've been thinking, what would it be like if I'd grown up with Dad?_

_Besides the fact that because of the war and all, I might not have made it to my first birthday. _

_Would I have a different attitude toward this stuff? Would I be totally bland and emotionless like Dad is now? Has he always been so...internally based? _

_What friends would I have? Probably Draco and I would be BFFs and hate Gryffindorks together. Maybe Aunt Cissy and Uncle Lucius would have raised me while Dad was out spying. Maybe I would be adopted by them and actually never know that they weren't my real family until I got my Hogwarts letter. Maybe it would be like living in America, except I would know about magic and my fake last name would be Malfoy instead of—never mind. I probably shouldn't write that. __Weasley__ was my name before Snape._

_Maybe the last year of my life still would have happened, only when I was 11 instead of 14. And I would still be a little mad at Dad for sending me away when he could have cared for me on his own, maybe with a little help from a colleague or a friend. Heck, maybe the Potters would have babysat me! What if I had been in their house when Voldemort came and what if I got killed? _

_No. Dad wouldn't have let that happen. He knew that Voldemort was going to the Potters' house, right? After he learned the prophecy that made V. want to kill Harry, he would never have let me out of his sight, much less to be with people he knew were in danger. _

_I wish I could have met Lily. Just once. Get to know her just to see what exactly Dad saw in her that he didn't see in Talitha. I wish I could meet them both. Lily __and__ Talitha. I would ask them so many questions. But they're both dead and gone. Long gone. Sigh. _

_This sucks. _

_Another thing: what if Mom hadn't died? Would she still have agreed with Dad that it was best to send me away so I would be safe? But the war was over by the time I was two, so I wouldn't have grown up in America for 14 years. Just one and 3/4. Maybe I would have a British accent (which I think I may be starting to develop. Finally). _

_So anywho, what if I had grown up with Mom __and__ Dad? How different would my world be now? Very, obviously. _

_On a different note, maybe Mom and Dad would've gotten divorced over the whole Lily thing. Because Dad probably was really depressed after Lily died. (What am I saying? Probably? He's STILL depressed.) _

_And maybe Talitha would get angry about that. Or maybe Dad would've left Mom and I still wouldn't know who my dad was until I went to Hogwarts and last year would happen anyway. _

_Is there any way my life would be any better if I had grown up here? Other than that I wouldn't have had to do 4 years in 1 last year. I might've grown up in the confusion of blood status. Maybe I would hate Hermione if it weren't for America. _

_And maybe I would hate Harry too. But it all depends on what Mom actually thought about V. If she was on the good side, I wouldn't've —weird word. At least, I__ think__ that's a word— heard all that crap from her, right? Maybe she was neutral, if that's possible. It's hardly believable. The whole Black family is pureblood, so she would've been at least somewhat influenced by that._

_This whole thing is too confusing to explain to you. Wait. Who am I talking to anyway? Silly me. Nobody's going to read my freaking diary as long as I have a say in that, so who am I addressing? I think I've gone insane._


	18. The I Love Yous

**The characters portrayed in this fanfiction are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. Also, this author, Flute Domination, does not own the rights to any part of the Harry Potter universe.**

* * *

Chapter Eighteen: The I Love Yous

March of the year 2013 AD, Human Reckoning.

And Meredith was still having nightmares every night. She had learned to stay in the Room of Requirement, where no one could hear her screams. Then in the morning, she would take the secret passageway back to her dormitory and lay in bed like she had been there all night.

Sometimes she stayed up all night playing music loudly, as if she could drown out the sound of Voldemort's voice that still echoed in her head, as clearly as if she was dreaming.

The days blurred past. Until the Ides of March.

It was late afternoon, and Meredith was sitting under the tree by the lake again with Neville, as had become their daily custom once more. She had stayed awake the whole night before, and was more exhausted than ever. And the sun was so warm and the air was so cool and Divination was so boring…

She woke up after a very calm sleep, feeling much better. She only wished that she weren't so tired all the time. Maybe then she could get something done. Would it help if she was _in_ the tree and the options were to stay awake or fall down?

As she looked up at the branches of the tree to judge if they would support her light form, Meredith realized that her head was resting on Neville's shoulder. It was so comfortable here…

Meredith quickly sat up straight, rubbing her eyes. "I'm sorry," she said, trying to stop a faint shade of pink from invading her pale cheeks. She found she had been doing a lot of blushing lately.

"It's alright. I know you're tired because of the nightmares. They haven't stopped?"

"No."

"Oh." His face went from serious to smiling. "You snore."

"What? I do not!" She hadn't smiled in days, but she was now.

"Just a little bit. Not that loudly, though."

Meredith playfully hit Neville on the arm with her Divination book. "Don't tell anyone."

"Or what?"

"Or…Or I'll tell everyone that you have a crush on Ginny Weasley." Two could play this game.

"What? That's not even true. If you're going to blackmail someone, you have to at least have true information."

"Says who? Is there a rulebook? Even if there is, I don't think anyone who does blackmail would bother following any rules."

"Fine. Truce?"

"Truce on what? Confidentiality?" _Stupid confidentiality_; a memory came back. She was sitting in Dumbledore's office again; _stupid confidentiality_.

"Yeah."

"Agreed." A few minutes passed, and all they did was look at the little island in the lake and watch the sun sink behind it. "Sorry I fell asleep."

"You already apologized. And I already said it's fine." He paused. "And you snore."

"Oh, shut up." She was back to smiling, feeling a little loopy still from sleep deprivation. She looked into Neville's bright blue eyes.

"They're red again, your eyes are," he told her.

"Yeah, I know. I've found that fake blood keeps me awake like caffeine." She was starting to drift off again. And she could sense that Voldemort was coming this time. _Occlumency_, she told herself, leaning her head against the tree trunk and closing the gates of her mind. But they were barred iron gates, and barred iron gates can be seen through.

She was watching herself from above. Her head had come to rest again on Neville's shoulder.

Lord Voldemort laughed. "_Now can you explain this to me?_"

"_Why? Why do you want me to? You can see for yourself_."

"_I need words, Meredith Snape. I need _words."

"_Come up with them yourself. What would _you_ call this?_"

He chuckled, and whispered one word: "_Tragic._"

Neville was shaking his head at her. He was walking away.

He was laughing, and hugging another girl with a blurred face while Meredith watched solemnly from around the corner.

He was dressed in a fancy suit, holding the hand of a woman in white who had her back turned to the Meredith sitting against a back wall.

Meredith looked through the window of a house and saw him holding a little baby.

He was old. Extremely old. He died holding a hand that was not Meredith's.

A life played out before her eyes. And Meredith was always on the edge of it, a mere _bystander_.

"No, it's not going to be that way," she said. "It's not."

"_Tragic. Tragic. Tragic,_" echoed all around her.

"Stop. Please. I don't know the words. Just stop. It's not going to be like that."

"_You're a mess, Miss Meredith. A tragic mess…_"

"Meredith, wake up," a different voice said.

She could see herself again, so blurry.

Neville's face came into focus in front of her. "Meredith. Can you hear me? Meredith, you've got to wake up, you're scaring me. Please, or I'm going to take you to the hospital wing."

"I'm awake!" She looked around her, and began packing her books in her bag.

"Good. Now, you didn't snore this time, but you said things like 'tragic' and 'it's not going to be that way' and 'stop' and something about words. It was really freaking me out. What were you dreaming about?"

"Tragic," she murmured to herself. Then she said out loud, "It's just like he said, Neville; I'm a mess. Dreaming these things that wouldn't seem at all bad to anyone else but they make me so sad. I'm insane. Doesn't my brain have anything better to do? Like rest? Instead of make up—" She stopped and stood.

"What? Make up what? What were you dreaming about?"

"It was you." She headed off towards the castle, dabbing her eyes with Sirius Black's handkerchief from last June, which she now kept with her to avoid getting blood from her eyes all over her hands.

She needed to think. But she couldn't think right now, not when she felt so sad she could cry out every drop of blood from her body. That was a scary thought.

Meredith went to the kitchens because the Room of Requirement was too far away and she knew the elves might be able to get her something that would help.

And sure enough, the house elves were all too sympathetic, even though Meredith never told them exactly what was wrong. She had to specify clearly that she only needed _one_ to talk to, not all ten million of them. So Dobby stayed with her as she drank a cup of fake blood.

"Dobby wishes he could help Miss." His huge eyes watered with sympathy.

"You know what, Dobby? You actually _can_ help."

"Anything, Miss."

"Will you go ask Harry Potter if he will help me learn to cast a Patronus charm?"

"Right away, Miss! Dobby will be right back!" Dobby Disapparated, then Apparated back into the room a few minutes later. "Harry Potter says to talk to him at the next meeting, Miss. Does that answer Miss's question?"

"Yes. Thank you, Dobby. For everything." She got up and left.

* * *

_Friday, March 15, 2013 5:24 PM_

_No, I didn't just wake up from a nightmare. I'm in the Room of Requirement. I'm sad. And the following is a list of words that describe what love is, to be recited to Voldemort:_

_You know what? Never mind. Maybe I'll just explain why I'm sad. I fell asleep by the lake, both times leaning on Neville's shoulder, and the second time I had a nightmare. Voldemort kept saying "tragic" and I watched Neville's whole future flash by in my mind._

_His future without me._

_It made me think, what if Neville really doesn't like me back and my life becomes a __tragedy__ like that? What if I tell him I like him and he doesn't like me too? To quote George McFly, I don't think I could take that kind of a rejection! And then maybe my life will become one big __tragedy__ and I'll always be sad like this only worse without him and miserable _

_STOP_

_How does this get me any closer to finding out what love is and putting it into words?_

_Love is when you care so much about someone that you never want to lose them._

_I guess that nightmare just defined loss._

_But how can I lose what I never had in the first place?_

_This whole thing is so confusing._

_I need to tell him. I have to tell Neville and then maybe I'll know for sure whether or not my life will be __tragic._

_But how do I do that? ARRRRGH!_

* * *

At the D.A. meeting that night, Meredith talked with Harry and they agreed to meet here during the Easter holiday to talk about Patronuses.

She continued to meet with Neville every afternoon by the lake to study and talk. They were officially best friends. Meredith thought this was a step.

Meredith suffered. Every day, she wished they could just forget the stupid eight-inch rule and sit closer together. The only times they were ever less than eight inches apart were the few times that Meredith fell asleep while studying and woke up on Neville's shoulder. She always woke up wondering how she got there and why she felt so comfortable there.

Every day, Meredith watched Neville and wished with all her heart that he loved her back.

Every day, she tried to tell him but could never get the words out. There was never a good time. During school they were around everybody and it was embarrassing (Meredith found herself blushing for no apparent reason several times); the only time was after classes by the lake. And even then, it was too hard to break the silence with a weighty subject like that. It could ruin their friendship if she wasn't careful.

March thirtieth, a Saturday. Meredith was having a bad day.

First, she hadn't been able to sleep all night, and vented in the Room of Requirement for hours before she finally cried herself into a half-sleep, during which she tossed and turned and couldn't get comfortable.

The next morning, she found blood in her underpants. _Lovely_, she thought. She was in pain all day.

While running, she twisted her ankle and had to be carried up to the hospital wing.

After getting out of the hospital wing, she ran all the way down to the Slytherin dorm, grabbed her bag, and sprinted into the corridor where her first class was on Mondays before realizing that it was Saturday and there weren't any classes.

At lunch, someone spilled pumpkin juice all over the front of her clothes, and she had to go shower to get the stickiness off, and change into fresh clothes.

While she was going down a corridor, Umbridge caught her stopping to look out the window at the sky, and sharply asked her what she was doing lollygagging around. Meredith had to play the innocent Slytherin once more. Umbridge was in a foul mood that day.

And just as she was confident that the day couldn't get any more awkward, Ginny Weasley came up to her just past the library on her way to the lake and asked, "Meredith, are you and Neville going out?"

"Uh…" She honestly didn't know how to answer. She had been hanging out alone with Neville by the lake for more than a month, so what exactly should she call the relationship they had? "I'll get back to you on that, okay, Ginny?"

Ginny looked confused. "O-kay. And here's your book. I finished it a few weeks ago, but I kept forgetting it and I didn't see you often."

"Oh. Right. I'll get you _The Two Towers _—that's the next one— at dinner, alright? How did you have time to read this? I thought everyone else was totally swamped."

"It's not my OWL year, remember?"

"Oh yeah. Well, I'll catch you later, Ginny. Bye." She walked quickly out of the castle to the lakeside, where Neville was waiting for her as usual.

And as usual, when she saw him sitting by the tree, that old cliché took effect and her heart skipped a beat. Goodness, would this ever stop?

"Hey," she said as Neville looked up.

"Hey," he said back.

She sat down in her normal place and took out a book to study. But Divination was boring and she hadn't had any fake blood with lunch, so she was soon fast asleep.

"_Again?_" Voldemort said. "_My, my. And yet you still deny it. You still cannot identify what this is and what it _means."

Meredith woke up leaning her head on Neville's shoulder. She sat up, apologized, and decided to bring up a subject that had been nagging at her for a while, but she never had an excuse to ask before today. "Neville, are we…going out? Ginny wanted to know." She added the last part quickly to avoid suspicion, though any logical deduction would probably be correct.

"Um…" Neville swallowed. "Well, I don't know. Do you want to?"

Finally, the question was asked! Meredith had been waiting for this moment for months! She flushed pink and tried to stay calm. _Just act natural_, she told herself. "Um—" She was turning a deeper shade of red. She let out a nervous laugh, and so did Neville. They were less than eight inches apart.

"Er… I've never had a girlfriend," Neville said, meeting Meredith's scarlet eyes and melting her heart with his. "I mean, I don't really know about this kind of stuff."

"Neither do I. I've never had a boyfriend."

She couldn't breathe.

She was going to faint.

Neville was closer.

She was going to pass out from lack of oxygen.

She wanted to drown in his deep eyes. Blue eyes.

But before Meredith could identify which color blue, his lips were pressed against hers, and Meredith Lily Snape was kissing Neville Longbottom for the first time in her life.

She closed her eyes, put her arms around his neck, and hugged him closer as he slipped an arm around her slim waist and held onto the ends of her long ebony curls.

They surfaced for air a few moments later and looked into each other's eyes again.

Neville brushed a strand of hair to the side of Meredith's face. "So, will you be my girlfriend?"

She smiled. "Of course." And they kissed again.

Such a sight as this had never been seen at Hogwarts ever before. A Gryffindor and a Slytherin willingly together. But Meredith was not a true Slytherin. Once a Gryffindor, always a Gryffindor at heart.

Meredith never wanted this to end. She could definitely tolerate spending forever here. It was like she had slipped into a dream, one that Tom Riddle could never interrupt…

"Meredith Lily Eileen Druella Snape, what on earth do you think you are doing?"

Meredith broke apart from Neville and whirled around, expecting to see Voldemort there because she was only dreaming again.

But it wasn't Voldemort. And this was definitely real life.

It was her father.

_ Oh, shit,_ Meredith thought.

Severus Snape roughly dragged his daughter by the arm all the way back to the castle after shooting a liquid-nitrogen-cold glare at Neville. Meredith protested loudly. "Hey! Let me go! What are you doing?! You're not the dictator of my life!" By the time they had reached the stairs leading down to the potions corridor, Meredith had resigned to singing in her head, _Down once more to the dungeons of my black dispair, down we plunge toward the prison of my mind. Down to darkness a pit as deep as—_

She was pushed into a chair in front of Professor Snape's desk.

"Now," he said, still standing, "answer me! What on earth did you think you were doing?"

"What did it look like?" Meredith hated it when her father wore his teacher face around her, but she felt confident enough not to be alarmed by it.

"Well, it appeared that" –Severus put on a sarcastically sweet tone— "you were enjoying a rather long snogging session with Longbottom!"

"So—So what?!"

"You lied to me."

"No I didn't! Things were different last time you said anything about it!"

"You've taken this too far since then. How long have you two been…" He waved a hand, searching for a phrase that wasn't in his usual vocabulary.

"Dad, relax! It was only today and the kissing, okay? It's not like there's been anything more than that going on! You're over-reacting!"

"I never want to see you with Longbottom or any other boy _ever again_."

"Why?!"

"Think! Bringing a boy into this will only make everything more complicated! It will only make you more vulnerable. Who was being tortured in the last ten nightmares? The Dark Lord is prying at your weaknesses. He will try to break you, and having a soft heart won't help anything!"

A soft heart. "You married Mom during the first wizarding war!"

"And I know now that I should not have." _Ouch_. "It is why I sent you to America. It was all to keep us both safe, but it will all be for naught if you purposely install well-known weaknesses in yourself."

"Purposely? I can't control how I feel any more than I can control when I get nightmares and when I don't!"

"Then you must learn to _control_ your feelings. Lock them away."

She was suddenly calm. "Like you do."

"Yes, in fact. Very much like I do."

The rage came out again. "BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE LIKE YOU!" She was screaming at the top of her lungs. "I never asked to be a part of _this_ family. How much you hide and risk and lie sickens me! You say what you're doing is all to protect me, but it never seems that way. There's always a different, more depressing reason that I can come up with, and somehow it always seems more likely than what you tell me. You say you don't want me to make myself vulnerable? I think you just have a grudge against Neville! Just let me live my life, okay?!" She just felt like crying now that all her pent-up anger was vented out.

"I—"

"No! Stop! Just leave me alone!" She stormed out of the office, then poked her head back in, remembering something. "Oh, and thanks for ruining my first kiss!"

Meredith jogged up the stairs, out of the dungeons, and up more stairs to the one place she knew she could be alone: the Room of Requirement.

The Room had transformed itself into a small corner with a soft floor. A box of tissues rested to one side, and a wastebasket adjacent to it. Meredith curled up in the little corner, closing the door behind her and hugging her knees. She wished that her father could never find her here, and she knew the Room would grant her wish. "Thank you, Hogwarts," she whispered to the warm darkness.

_I'm such a baby_, she thought,_ hiding in a closet. I'm so stupid._ She wiped her eyes with a tissue and tried to sort out her feelings one person at a time.

She didn't hate her father. She hated how he was controlling her. She wished they could get along.

Meredith didn't know how she felt about Neville. Not having him here to tell everything to hurt her heart, almost physically. She missed him already, but now she was forbidden from seeing him.

Somehow she could never get farther than Neville during these sort-out-feelings sessions. Thinking of Neville made her too confused and jittery inside to go on to thinking about anyone else. She tried to convince herself that the jitters wouldn't continue forever, but even tomorrow seemed years away.

The tears kept running down her cheeks and splashing on her knees. Her stupid father had so rudely interrupted her first kiss, just like Tom Riddle had interrupted all those dreams, only worse. Some people were just so inconsiderate.

The door opened and bright sunlight came into the room.

"Meredith?" Neville said. Meredith didn't move, so he picked her up by the arms and held her for a moment. "Meredith, your face is covered in blood. And so are your hands. Why?"

A tear ran down her cheek and answered his question. She was crying blood. _Side effects of being half vampire_, he figured.

"C'mon. I'll walk you to the closest lavatory. You can wash your face and hands in there." He put an arm around her shoulders and held her hand, regardless of the blood. Together they walked down the corridor until they reached a door with a sign that read "Girls."

Meredith turned to Neville. "I'm sorry," she choked out.

"It's okay. Everything's okay." He held both her hands in his. "What did your father do?"

"He got angry. He said that…that…love only makes you more vulnerable to be hurt by You-Know-Who because he attacks loved ones. And…he said…he said…I can never be with any boy ever again." Blood dripped down her cheeks again and splattered on the stone floor of the corridor.

"He said that?"

Meredith could only nod and cry more.

"I guess this is the end of afternoons by the lake, huh?"

"We'll see about that." Meredith wrapped her arms around Neville's neck and kissed him. "I love you, Neville." And she disappeared into the lavatory.

* * *

When much of the sadness was gone and all cried out, Meredith found that what was left was more anger. She was angry with her father for ruining her first relationship. What made her even angrier was when he told Neville to stay after class one day, and they disappeared into his office. Meredith suspected that the gist of what her father had said was "Stay away from my daughter, or else." She also suspected that Neville's potions grade would be steadily dropping over the next year, and not just because Meredith wasn't there to help him anymore.

She started drinking fake blood like normal humans drink water. It was her morning coffee, which she hadn't had since the Starbucks two blocks away from her house in America closed. Meredith's eyes became a permanent dark red, and did not lighten up to purple again until that summer.

During the following week, Meredith made frequent visits to the Room of Requirement, often at midnight when she was afraid of sleeping.

The next potions class, Professor Snape asked Meredith to stay after. She reluctantly did.

"What?" She was still so tired and so upset.

"I wanted to tell you that the only reason I came looking for you on March thirtieth is because it was your mother's birthday and I thought you might like to go visit her grave."

"What?" She felt conflicted again. "Wh—never mind—AAUGH!" She grabbed her bag and left.

That afternoon when she went to the Room of Requirement, she found something she had not been expecting.

When she opened the great ornate doors to the Room, the usual furnishings were gone. There was only a piano in the center of the room, in front of what looked like a fancy mirror.

Meredith closed the door behind her and sat down on the piano bench. She opened a book of exercises and was preparing to play when she glanced in the mirror.

She did a double take.

That wasn't her face in the mirror. It wasn't her reflection. She stood and took a closer look.

Standing in the mirror looking down at her was a woman she recognized from the picture she kept in her pocket all the time.

It was her mother. She was sure of it. Her mother was standing right there in the mirror, smiling down at her.

Meredith touched the glass and found it was completely solid. "Mom?" She appeared in the mirror next to her mother. "You weren't like your sisters, were you?" she asked.

Talitha shook her head. She put an arm around Meredith's shoulder and smiled again.

Meredith touched her own shoulder, but there was no hand there. Nobody else was in the room.

She had the exact same white smile she did in the photo. The necklace wasn't around Talitha's neck, and Meredith took it out of her own shirt front to show her mother, who smiled even brighter, if that was possible.

A drop of blood landed on the floor. Meredith hadn't even noticed she was crying. Why was she crying again? She had already cried so much this past week. (Why is there so much crying in these stories?)

Meredith sat down on the ground, took out her handkerchief, wiped her eyes, and stared up at the mirror. She couldn't read the symbols engraved at the top.

"Mom, can you hear me?" Meredith asked. The figure in the mirror took on a saddened look. "Mom, why is Dad always unhappy with me?"

No response.

"Mom, why doesn't he ever let me be my own person?"

Talitha shook her head sorrowfully.

"Mom, I love you."

Talitha smiled again and nodded. A single shining tear ran down her pale cheek like unicorn blood.

"Mom, I really wish you were here."

* * *

**About Meredith's middle names: Lily is obvious. Eileen was Snape's mother. Druella was Talitha's mother. More reviews!**

**Clarinetist: Questions? Comments? Feel free to ignore me the whole weekend. And the whole week, for that matter.  
**

**Yes, I changed the order sort of because I came up with another idea for a chapter. What was originally chapter 17 is actually here in chapter 18. Chapter 19 will be coming as soon as I finish it. Thanks for reading!  
**


	19. Letters From Neville

Chapter Nineteen: Letters From Neville

One evening in April, Meredith was sitting on her bed in the Slytherin dorm, reading her father's Defense Against the Dark Arts book and sulking. That morning, she'd had a heart-to-heart with Neville instead of running. She had told him about how she felt, and even dared to tell him about the nightmares that involved him and what Voldemort wanted to know. In return, Meredith received stories of how nervous Neville had been whenever he hugged her, when he kissed her cheek before Christmas vacation, and especially about March thirtieth, which Meredith had written in her diary in detail, to be remembered forever.

At the same time, Neville was sitting on his own bed, half-sulking as well. Suddenly inspired for some odd reason, he got a quill, ink, and parchment, and wrote:

_Professor Snape,_

_It is very unfair that you won't let me be with your daughter Meredith. She is her own independent person, and she doesn't need you to make decisions for her. I understand that you're worried about He Who Must Not Be Named, but really, it's love that keeps us __together__ in these times. You-Know-Who already knows much more than you think he does. I don't know what's kept Meredith from going insane from fear this whole time. I suppose at least part of it is because of us. Please don't interfere any longer. She can handle this. She can handle more than you think._

_Sincerely,_

_Neville Longbottom_

He read the letter to himself, ripped it in half, and crumpled up the pieces. He would be blown to pieces in front of the whole class for talking to Professor Snape like that. Snape would probably never read it anyway.

He started on a new piece of parchment:

_Dear Gran,_

_Sorry I haven't written back in a while. I've been busy with homework. The teachers have started giving more essays than ever as homework to review for OWLs. _

_Gran, do you remember that girl who came over on Christmas? Meredith Snape? Well,_

He crumpled up that letter as well. This was his _grandmother_ he was writing to. She wouldn't understand, like maybe his parents would have.

On his third piece of parchment:

_Dear Meredith,_

He crumpled up that piece of paper and resigned to finishing the Herbology essay. There was nothing more to say than what had been said that morning.

**Clarinetist: Thanks for your help on this chapter.**


	20. Consequences and Family Reunions

Chapter Twenty: Consequences and Family Reunions (same thing?)

April still:

It was almost time to scout out Umbridge for the D.A., so Meredith put down her book and left the Slytherin dungeon. She was on the third floor when she heard footsteps. Clacking footsteps, like high heels on stone. She dove behind a suit of armor and waiting, peeking over the knight's shoulder.

Umbridge came clicking past in her normal all-pink outfit. She was with Filch and some Slytherins, including Draco Malfoy.

"That girl had better be right that they have been meeting there."

"Yes, ma'am," Draco said, smiling behind Umbridge's back.

Meredith didn't need to hear any more. As soon as the group had turned a corner, she dashed out of her hiding place and jumped over the railing, falling three floors before casting an "_Arresto Momentum_," to stop her descent. She hovered above the floor for a second before landing on the ground. "Ow." The wind was knocked out of her lungs, as if she had just done a belly flop from the high dive. "Never doing that again." She picked herself up, ran down the hall to the kitchens, tickled the pear, and burst in. "Dobby!"

"Yes, Miss?"

"I need for you to do me a favor."

"Yes, Miss?"

"Go to the Room of Requirement and warn Harry that Umbridge is coming." The house elf didn't move. "Right now! Please!"

"Oh, Miss. The house elves have been warned not to tell…"

"Dobby, you're a free elf. You're the best elf I know! Who do you like better, me or Umbridge?"

Dobby thought for a moment. "Dobby likes Miss, of course. Dobby will try." He disappeared with a crack.

Meredith jogged back to her dormitory, dressed in pajamas, and got into bed. She hated having nothing to do; it gave her time to think about her life, and much of the time ended in a bloodied handkerchief.

But by now, she was sick of crying, so she read the Defense Against the Dark Arts book until she fell asleep, worrying all the time that the D.A. had been caught and she hadn't been able to do anything about it.

* * *

Harry came up to her the next morning at breakfast and they talked personally for the first time in a while. Although, it wasn't _quite_ so personal.

"Meredith," Harry said quickly, almost in a whisper, obviously uncomfortable with the glares he was getting from Slytherins.

Meredith swallowed her bacon. "What?"

"Come with me."

"Why?"

"Just—Just come over here for a second. We need to talk."

"O-kay." She knew what this was about. And she knew she was going to get told off by Harry Freaking Potter. Again.

They went out of the Great Hall and stood face to face next to the doorway, under the wall of Educational Decrees.

"What happened?" Harry shot.

"The D.A. got caught."

"Yeah. Where were you? I thought you were on our side."

"I _am_, Harry."

"But where were you?"

"I was going there when I saw Umbridge."

"_And?_"

"_I_ sent Dobby! Didn't he come and tell you?"

"By then it was too late."

"Harry, I'm really sorry. You don't know how much I—"

"No! If you really cared about it, you would be with all of us in detention for the next two weeks!"

"I—"

"Just shut up!" Harry yelled at the top of his lungs. Then he suddenly calmed down. "I'm sorry, Meredith. I—I didn't mean to yell at you. I lost control. Really, I'm sorry."

"I understand what you mean, Harry. It's him, isn't it? V-Voldemort?"

Harry nodded, studying the floor.

"Listen, don't trust any dream you have. It's not real."

"I don't get what you mean."

"Yes, you do. Now tell me what happened with the D.A."

"Dobby came and couldn't say much. We left, but a squad of _Slytherins_ were everywhere and now I have bruises on both of my knees because they tripped me. We were all taken to Dumbledore's office and the Minister of Magic was there. They wanted to put Dumbledore in Azkaban, but he Disapparated with Fawkes, his phoenix, and now he's gone."

_This is not good,_ Meredith thought. With Dumbledore gone, Umbridge could do anything. Even Voldemort himself could probably walk into the school without being noticed. This was not a very safe situation to be in.

Filch walked up to the wall with an extremely tall, extremely wobbly ladder, and another Educational Decree. He glared at Harry and Meredith, climbed the ladder, and nailed to the wall:

"_Dolores Jane Umbridge (High Inquisitor) has replaced Albus Dumbledore as Head of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry."_

"Oh, no," Harry and Meredith said in unison. Then they went back to their house tables and brooded.

On her way to class after lunch, Meredith heard a different announcement coming from the pink speakers: "Students who wish to join the Inquisitorial Squad for extra credit may sign up in the Headmistress's office."

_Have to join_, was Meredith's automatic thought. Maybe she could help Harry re-form the D.A. that way, and she could give Umbridge false information instead of no information at all.

So, after classes were done for the day, Meredith went to Professor Umbridge's office, where there was an Inquisitorial Squad meeting going on. The people there were all Slytherins: Draco, Crabbe, Goyle, Zabini, Nott, and some others Meredith didn't know. She walked calmly into the room, holding her head higher than she normally kept it.

Umbridge looked up from the roll of parchment she was reading. "Yes? What is it, Miss… I'm sorry, I forgot your name, dear."

"I'm Meredith Snape," Meredith said with a smile. "I'd like to join the Inquisitorial Squad."

"Of course you do! Sign your name on the list, Miss Snape. And sit down."

The rest of the meeting was basically a list of things they could give detention for, from coughing in any way that sounded like an imitation of Umbridge to building a swamp inside the castle. A lot of students were going to be in detention this week.

To conclude the meeting, all of the members of the Inquisitorial Squad were given special badges with a superimposed 'I' on them. The badges were to be worn on their robes, right under the Slytherin emblem.

Meredith wondered what house Umbridge had been in. Probably Pinkiesparkles, whose mascot was a fluffy kitten, and whose founder was Petra Pinkiesparkles. (_Gee, what a name_.) Such a house, fortunately, did not exist at Hogwarts.

Meredith very rarely used her position to give orders or get anyone in trouble. If a couple was snogging, she'd look the other way and pretend not to have noticed. If a big group of students was meeting together, she wouldn't break up the "club." However, she did have to break up a few fights, most of them between Slytherins and Gryffindors.

The weeks of study all slurred together until a much-needed Easter break came. The Friday that vacation started, Meredith remembered that she needed to talk with Harry about when exactly he would teach her about Patronuses, if he would teach her at all. She caught him after classes and asked if he was going to Sirius's house for Easter or if he was staying at Hogwarts.

"I'm staying here. A lot of people are, actually. You are?"

"Yes. I was wondering, Harry, if you remember that we talked a few weeks ago about you showing me how to cast a Patronus charm?"

"Right. If you don't have anywhere to be right now, we could go to the Room of Requirement and I'll teach you."

"Sure. I don't need to be anywhere until dinner."

"Great. Let me put my stuff back in my room and I'll meet you there, alright?"

"Okay." Meredith went to the dungeons to put away her school things. Then she went up eight floors to the ever-amazing Room of Requirement. Harry was waiting for her.

"Hey, what's that doing here?" Harry asked, pointing to a piano in the corner.

"Oh. Yeah. I guess the Room knows it's me. I play piano."

"Oh. Okay."

"No Ron and Hermione?"

"No. There are some things I want to talk to you about."

"Okay. Shoot."

"Patronuses first. So, a Patronus is like a shield. It—"

"Protects you from Dementors because they feed off of _it_ instead of _you_, and they can be used to send messages."

"I didn't know you could send messages."

"Yeah." She was starting to hate the charmed Sickle because the vibration was annoying.

"Hmm. Anyway, to conjure a Patronus—and this is where you really need to focus—you have to think of something really really happy. Try to think of something really happy now."

_Think of a wonderful thing, it's the same as having wings…_

What to think of?

"It doesn't necessarily have to be real," Harry told her, "or all the way happy. It just needs to be strong."

"What's your happy thought, Harry?"

"My parents."

A classic Lost Boy answer. How about that. Maybe Meredith could think of her parents, too. The way they were in the photo in her pocket. On second thought, maybe just her mother.

But that brought tears to her eyes.

"Now, allow the memory to fill you up. So much that it actually makes you smile."

Meredith cleared her mind of everything but the thought of her mother.

"Take out your wand."

Meredith got her wand from the inside pocket of her robes.

"And say the words, 'Expecto Patronum.' Like this: _Expecto Patronum!_" A silvery white stag issued forth from Harry's wand and trotted around the room once before dissipating into the air. "You try."

Meredith concentrated on the memory of her mother laughing and smiling in the photo, pretending it was real life. She remembered the figure in that special mirror. "_Expecto Patronum!_"

Nothing happened.

"That's okay. Nobody gets it their first time. Just focus really hard on that memory. Try again when you're ready."

"_Expecto Patronum!_"

Still nothing. Not even a puff of white mist.

"Maybe try a different memory?"

"Okay." Great. What else was there? Neville? It was worth a shot. Meredith cleared her mind and then filled it with her thoughts and memories of Neville, excluding her father from all of them. "_Expecto Patronum!_" She was sure it would work this time.

Nothing. Meredith was getting frustrated. "Why can't I do it?"

"Maybe you need to concentrate more. Just keep trying."

"_Expecto Patronum!_"

"Okay, that's odd. Normally, you would be getting a cloud by now, but I guess that's not the case. I don't know what to tell you, other than to keep practicing. I mean, it's always worked for me when I have a strong memory like you probably do. I don't know why this isn't working."

"Argh. Neither do I. So what was it you wanted to talk about?"

"Um, this is actually about a dream I've been having for months now." _Uh-oh._ "So, I'm in this corridor made of black shiny bricks, and at the end of the hallway there's a door with a knob in the center, but every time I get close to opening the door, I wake up and it's gone."

"Harry, I might not be the best person for you to be telling this to." She was still having nightmares every other night.

He continued anyway, "But last night, I saw what was behind that door. It was a huge room with rows and rows of shelves, like a library, only instead of books there were these glowing blue glass orbs. It was the same place where Ron's dad was attacked."

"Stop."

"What?"

"Harry, you can't trust these dreams."

"Why not? It was right last time, and it saved Mr. Weasley's life."

"You can't trust these dreams anymore, Harry. You have to wake yourself up before you open that door."

"Why?"

Meredith lowered her voice, even though there was no one else there to hear her. "He knows you broke into his snake's mind on accident. He knows what you saw there, and he's going to create a false vision to trick you into going there, and then he'll kill you."

"How do you know he actually knows all this?"

Meredith bit the inside of her lip and looked away.

"You're the one who told him, aren't you?"

Meredith nodded. She could tell that Harry was trying to keep his temper.

"I can't handle this right now." Harry strode toward the door.

"It was an accident, I promise. Practice Occlumency," Meredith advised him. "And don't trust the dreams." It might be true that Occlumency never helped her, but maybe it could help Harry. "Have a good holiday."

Harry Potter left the room, and as he did, Meredith's gaze was drawn toward the piano in the corner. "Not right now, thanks," she told the Room, and she left to go find Neville.

He was sitting by the lake, studying an odd-looking flower and drawing it in a notebook.

"Hey," Meredith said as she approached, blushing with the mere presence of him. She sat down next to him on the cool earth and leaned her head on his shoulder. He put an arm around her. "Are you going home for vacation?"

"No," he replied. "Gran wants me here to study for OWLs. She says I'd better get at least two Outstandings, or I'll be shaming my parents."

"One day, Neville, she'll learn to appreciate you for who you are, not for who you are compared to your parents."

"I sure hope so." He paused. "Are you staying?"

"Where else would I go? This will just be another boring vacation with nothing to do and nowhere to go." _Except visit Voldemort_, she added in her mind.

"Hmm. Are you still getting nightmares?"

"Not as often as I used to."

"Still snoring?"

She sighed. "Now how should I know that? I'm asleep when I snore." Neville laughed.

"I saw you going with Harry up the stairs. Did he teach you how to cast a Patronus?"

"Yep."

"And?"

"I can't do it."

Neville looked surprised. "What do you mean? I thought you could do any spell even without the words."

"I guess this is an exception. Watch. _Expecto Patronum!_" Nothing happened. Meredith tried the spell again, without the incantation, thinking of how a silver figure would burst into the air. But no such thing happened. "See? What about you?"

"I only got it for a second. Don't know what it was, though. Something furry."

"Oh."

They sat in silence for a long time.

"Aren't you worried about your father finding us?"

Meredith cast a quick Disillusionment Charm over both of them. "No."

They sat watching the sun sink gradually under the mountains. The world was all grey when Neville suggested they go eat dinner.

* * *

"Chocolate in the library! Out! Out!" Madam Pince shouted at Harry and Ginny the next morning. Meredith and Neville, sitting at their usual table in the library, got some amusement out of watching Harry's and Ginny's school things chase them out the door. Conveniently, the table was placed in a way so they could see whoever came into the library, but they could not be seen from the door. Meredith had swapped sides of the table with Neville so she could watch the door and make sure her father didn't "catch her with Longbottom."

And who should walk into the library at that very moment but Severus Snape himself? As soon as Meredith saw, she grabbed her bag, closed her book, and slipped behind a shelf, like she had planned long ago and put into action several times. But those had all been false alarms.

Meredith walked quickly as far away from the table as she could without drawing suspicion. Soon she found an empty window seat and, checking her surroundings, plopped into it and opened her book again, trying to read until he found her.

Severus Snape came into view and stopped directly in front of Meredith, his hands clasped behind his back. Then he held up a brown quill with a dark blue stripe down the center.

"Nice try. I do believe this is your favorite quill. What, pray, was it doing sitting carelessly on the floor next to Longbottom's study table? Coincidence? I think not."

Meredith grabbed her quill from him. It _was_ her favorite one. Self-inking.

"I have come to tell you," her father continued, "that you were invited to dine tonight at Malfoy Manor."

Meredith was about to protest, but her father held up his hand.

"I will not be there—"

"What?"

"I will not be there, but I do believe this will be a good opportunity for you to grow acquainted with your mother's family, and perhaps come to a peace treaty with your brat cousin Draco."

"Ha. Like _that_ will ever happen."

Her father glared down at her. "Young lady, I expect you to have excellent behavior and at least _try_ to be polite to them. My office, six o'clock sharp. Dress nicely." He walked off.

Meredith looked at what she was wearing: school shirt, purple Weasley sweater, faded jeans, old converse that had recently been cleaned by the house elves. It wasn't _that_ bad. Well, her hair _was_ in a semi-messy—okay, a very disorganized—bun. Still, _he_ was one to judge. _He_ wore the same exact thing every day.

Meredith returned to the table and sat her stuff down again.

"You dropped your quill," Neville told her.

"Yeah, so what? He needs to get used to it sometime. After all, if I ever get married, he'll have to deal with it a lot more." She realized what the way she worded that sentence could imply. "I mean, he would have to get used to there _being_ a guy there, you know?" She sat down and hid her face behind a book.

"I get what you're trying to say. What did he tell you?"

"Well, other than the part about 'ha ha, caughtcha red-handed, missy,' I'm having dinner with the Malfoys tonight."

"Oh. Good luck to you, then. Happy family reunion-ing."

"Yeah. And my dad isn't going to be there. It's going to be so weird, I just know it. Of course, a little bit of awkwardness to break the ice is probably better than him clashing with the Malfoys."

"How are you related to them again?"

"Draco's mom is my mom's sister. I have to meet my dad in his office at six. Plenty of time to stew about it."

Five o'clock approached quietly, like a class you have the last period of the day, whose test you know you're going to fail. When it finally came, Meredith was very aware of it (she had been glancing at the clock every five minutes for an hour now) and she felt nervous, to say the least.

Reluctantly, she packed up her books, said goodbye to Neville, and walked slowly to the Slytherin dorm. Once in her room, she searched her wardrobe for something to wear. By "nice," her father probably meant a _dress,_ not pants, and certainly not blue jeans.

So, half an hour later, she showed up in a flowery Easter dress and Converse sneakers (with high socks), just to spite him. When he saw her, his face took on an expression that looked like he was counting to ten inside his head. "By 'nice,' I meant—"

"I know, I know. The black dress and the boots." Meredith wasted fifteen minutes changing, not because she wanted to be late, but because the corset fit so differently and she _had_ to spend ten minutes in front of a mirror examining the change because she had thought it would never happen. It was weird. A little scary, in fact, like all growing up is.

She found her father tapping his toes in the common room, waiting for her. "Finally."

They walked together out the gates of the castle grounds, and Disapparated.

They appeared on a small hillside. In front of them was a large house surrounded by tall hedges. There was a road leading up to the house, blocked by a black iron gate; the road surrounded the house like a moat would surround a castle.

"Well, here we are," Meredith's father announced, and they walked down the hill onto the road leading up to the gate. With a quick flourish of Severus's wand, the gate opened for them.

Walking up the path to the door, Meredith noticed white peacocks strutting about on the lawn. Weird.

Severus rang the bell, and the door was soon opened by none other than Wormtail.

"Why is he here now?" Meredith whispered to her father when Wormtail was a few steps ahead of them.

"Did you think I would allow him to stay at our house all school year while we are not there?"

She didn't respond, but thought, _You let him stay in the house when I was home alone this summer._

They entered a large sitting room with ornate Persian rugs and dark flowery sofas.

"It's Merryyyyyy!" a shrieking voice rang loudly through the house as a figure in all black hurled towards them from a side door. Meredith was crushed into not a friendly bear hug, but a squeeze-the-life-out-of-you python hug.

"Aagh! Who is this?" It was an instinctive reaction; each time she got a surprise hug in America, this was what Meredith would shout.

She was held at armslength by a tall woman with a gaunt face and shining black curly hair with one streak of grey in it.

Meredith almost screamed. It was Bellatrix Lestrange, Azkaban escapee (she had cleaned up a bit since her mug shot), guilty of torturing Frank and Alice Longbottom to insanity, and aunt of Meredith and Draco. Lovely.

But the real reason Meredith almost screamed was because Bellatrix Lestrange looked like a much older, darker-eyed, skinnier version of the face Meredith saw in the bathroom mirror every morning. _Creepy._

"Merry! You're so big now! Oh, look at you!" She abruptly turned toward Severus, and hissed like a snake. "Snape."

"Bellatrix. So sorry I can't stay. I'll be leaving now." He looked at Meredith. "I will come for you at nine." Then he turned on his heel and went back downstairs to the door.

Lucius, Narcissa, and Draco Malfoy entered the room. Narcissa gave Meredith a less suffocating hug than Bellatrix had (which didn't take much). Lucius Malfoy shook her hand, and Draco didn't do anything until his mother subtly pushed him forward, at which point he extended his hand, quickly shook hers, and stepped back again, crossing his arms. He obviously did _not_ want to be here, but that was okay. Meredith didn't really want to be here either, but she put on a smile and managed to fake it almost the whole time.

"Shall we have supper?" Uncle Lucius said. Meredith followed the group into another room, one with a long black table and many chairs. Only one end of it was set for a meal, so they all sat there. Coincidentally, Meredith was placed next to Draco.

Wormtail brought out dishes of something that smelled good, and the "family" began to eat. Bellatrix sniffed her food suspiciously before trying a small piece of it.

"Meredith," Uncle Lucius addressed her, "Do you go by a different name? Perhaps Merry, or do you go by your middle name, Lily…?"

"No. Just Meredith. Sometimes Merry. I'll answer to almost anything if you yell it loud enough."

The Malfoys looked shocked by Meredith's sense of humor at this time. After all, when she had last seen them, she was a panicking, frightened fifteen-year-old. But the part about the names was true! The first week of school in America was always a pain, because teachers were always guessing names to try to remember them, and because Meredith wasn't a very common name at that school, the teachers always guessed wrong. So far, she had been called Anne, Taylor, Marissa, Catherine, Ashley, Madison, Miranda, and Margaret.

Lucius Malfoy cleared his throat. "And how has school been for you, Meredith?"

"It's going well." She was careful to use proper grammar around these proper people.

"I trust that Draco has been friendly toward you."

Draco appeared panicked for half a second. He pushed his food around his plate and looked down.

"Of course he has," Meredith stated with very believable sincerity. She would help Draco out _this time_.

"Draco, dear, why didn't you write to us about this?" Narcissa asked her son.

"I've been busy with schoolwork."

Meredith couldn't help but notice how much more subdued Draco was at home than he was at school. He almost had two personalities: one for his mother so she would think he was a good boy, and one for school so everyone there would see him as a "bad boy."

The rest of dinner was awkward, but Meredith managed to get through it, even when her mother was mentioned and Bellatrix made a not-so-nice comment in passing about her father. They did not talk about the Dark Lord, but Meredith knew that each of her relatives had at least glimpsed the Dark Mark on her arm.

They went into another room, one with fluffy armchairs and a crystal chandelier. They sat and Wormtail brought tea to Meredith and Draco, and wine to the adults. Meredith sipped her tea (just the way she liked it, plain, with no milk or sugar in it) and Bellatrix asked who she was friends with at school.

So, not wanting to bring Neville into this, she told them about her friends from Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw, who she didn't hang out with often anymore, but when she did, she was welcomed back into their groups. To her family, she portrayed them as her best friends whom she was with every day.

Then Bellatrix asked, "So, Merry, do you have a boyfriend?"

If a photographer had been there at that instant, he or she would have entitled the picture, "Awkward family photo, featuring the girl whose aunt worse than murdered her boyfriend's parents, and is now trying to devise a way to get out of this uncomfortable situation before her mean cousin can say anything." Or simply, "Awkward family photo 130,026." There are way too many awkward family photos in the world.

All Meredith could say was "Um," before Draco started snickering loudly.

"What is it, Draco?" Narcissa snapped.

"It's just—so pathetic—never mind. Excuse me." He exited the room, still laughing to himself.

"You were saying, Merry?"

"Oh. Yeah. My boyfriend. Right."

"I promise we won't laugh, Merry. Draco was very rude to. Who is it?"

"Um. Neville Longbottom."

Breaking the promise Narcissa had made, Bellatrix let out a mad cackle. "Neville Longbottom! Ha!" She began to laugh hysterically, and left the room.

Meredith located the closest fireplace with Floo powder on the mantle.

"Is that true?" Uncle Lucius inquired. Meredith nodded. "Well, then."

Awkward silence.

"I'll go check on Draco and Bella." Lucius stood up and left Meredith and Narcissa alone.

"I'm sorry about Draco and Bella," Aunt Cissy said.

"It's okay."

"No, it was very rude of them. But you know how Bella can be a little…"

"Crazy?"

"I suppose so, yes. We think the dementors of Azkaban have something to do with it. What does your father think about your relationship? Draco has told me that Neville Longbottom is by far the worst at potions."

"Yeah. That's true. And technically speaking, Neville isn't supposed to be my boyfriend anymore."

"I understand."

"Really?"

"Of course. When I was your age, I had a secret boyfriend as well. He wasn't a pureblood, so I ended up marrying Lucius, but for quite a while I kept the secret from my parents."

"Wow." Meredith was starting to warm up to this aunt just a little bit. Maybe not all of her family was that bad.

Uncle Lucius returned and sat, followed closely by an ashamed-looking Draco. Bellatrix came back shortly after them.

The antique pendulum clock on the wall chimed five minutes to nine. "Goodness, the time passes so quickly. Merry, I believe it is almost time for your father to come for you," Lucius said.

They all stood up and everyone except Draco hugged Meredith.

"Draco, would you be so kind as to walk your cousin to the gate to meet her father?" Narcissa said in a sweet tone. "Goodbye, Meredith. It was wonderful seeing you again."

"Bye." Meredith went down the stairs and out the front door with Draco. Out in the chilly night air, she wished she had brought a cloak or something.

"Cold?" Draco took off his dark blazer and offered it to her in a surprisingly gentlemanly manner.

"Thanks." Meredith took the coat and put it on. This might be a style she would have to get into. It certainly hid the Dark Mark well.

"You really _could_ do better, you know," Draco said.

"Better at what?

"The reason I laughed about it is because it's so stupid. You and that clumsy Longbottom."

"Well, that's a nice thing to say."

"I only meant that for a girl like you, I would have thought you to have better _taste_." He smirked at his own pun.

"Like who?"

"Well, Blaise seems interested in you—"

"Blaise Zabini? Really? And which is he interested in more: me, my body, or his own potions grade?"

"Listen here, Snape. You and Longbottom must be the most ridiculous couple Hogwarts has ever seen. Add onto that the fact that he's Gryffindor, and you're Slytherin."

"Fine then, _Malfoy_. If you're going to talk trash about _my_ relationship, maybe I should start talking trash about _yours_. Pansy Parkinson is the meanest girl in Slytherin; she thinks she's all that just because she's got you, the Prince of Slytherin, and everyone is too scared to stand up to her and stop her from lording over them all. At least my boyfriend is nice to people."

"Says the girl who everyone is afraid will bite their necks in the middle of the night."

"Says the ferret who ran away from an old fat gimpy man with a cane."

"Freak."

"Coward."

"Teacher's pet."

"Mommy's boy."

"Mudblood."

Meredith sighed. "You really know an insult competition is over when the best your opponent can come up with is _Mudblood_."

"I could use more colorful language, if you'd like."

"Hmm. I'll pass."

They had reached the gate. Severus Snape appeared with a pop just beyond it. Meredith took off the coat and gave it back to Draco. "Thanks for letting me use that. I'll see you after the holidays?"

"Yeah."

They shook hands. Meredith went out the gate and met up with her father.

"Did you enjoy yourself?"

"You could say that."

* * *

**Clarinetist: Guess who Draco is? (Hint: It's not just one person.)  
**


	21. No Ordinary Task

Chapter Twenty-One: No Ordinary Task

On Wednesday of the week of the Easter holidays, Meredith felt the fake Sickle vibrate in her pocket, and went to her father's office.

"Yeah?"

Severus Snape looked up from the book he was reading. "You know what to do."

Yes, she _did_ know what to do. She went to her room and put on the black gown and the boots, adding one of her school cardigan sweaters to hide the Dark Mark. Then she braided her hair and went back to meet her father, who was in the common room.

As they walked arm in arm onto the school grounds, it occurred to Meredith how little contact she had with her father during the school year. The last time they had talked was after Meredith's visit to Malfoy Manor, and that had only been a couple of words before Meredith was sent off to her dorm, where, again, she freaked out the other girls by stopping for a cup of fake blood so her eyes were red. It was still so funny to watch their reactions.

"How are you doing, Dad?"

"I am well. How are you?"

"Good." It was difficult to get a conversation going with a semi-anti-social potions professor. "What've you been doing during vacation?"

"Grading papers, making potions, reprimanding students, the usual. Have you been studying?"

"Yeah. Every day." She could guess what question was coming next, but her father remained silent.

They Disapparated just outside the gate, having met no students on their way there. Everyone must have been in the library studying for tests. Meredith realized that she actually needed to start studying if she didn't want to have to cram at the last minute. At least she was the kind of person to have _learned_ from past procrastinating experiences.

They were at the dilapidated old house again. The creepy one with cobwebs everywhere.

"Severus, you may wait outside," Lord Voldemort said, facing the empty fireplace in the upstairs room. Meredith went in and the door shut by itself.

"Miss Snape, might I ask you _why_, every time you come to see me, you wear that one gown?"

Meredith was caught quite off guard. "My dad says I need to dress up and that this is appropriate, my lord." Was he trying to read her mind? _Occlumency_.

"Do you struggle with…being your own independent person around your father, Miss Snape?"

"Some of the time, I guess, but not really."

"And tell me, Miss Snape, for I know not how to compare you to other girls of your age group. Do you have any sense of style?"

What was up with this?! Since when did Lord Freaking Take-Over-the-World Snake-Man care about style?! "Of course I have a sense of style! I just—"

"All of my Death Eaters wear black. I would appreciate some variety, Miss Snape." For a second, she thought she could see and hear the teenage Tom Riddle speaking to her.

"Yes, my lord." _Weird!_

"Meredith Snape." Voldemort turned around to face her. As usual, the sight of his deformed face frightened her. The wall around her mind began to crumble. "You have noticed a decrease in the frequency of these dreams, I trust?"

Meredith nodded. She had been getting _way _more sleep lately.

"That is because I have decided what exactly to do with the information you have given me."

"What?"

He explained it to her.

"I can't do that. No. I just can't."

"Still in love with Potter? Honestly, I thought you had moved on." He snickered, and his snakelike nostrils flared.

"Well, no, I mean, yes, I've moved on, but he's still my friend, you know?"

"Show me your left forearm, Miss Snape."

Reluctantly, Meredith extended her left arm, palm up.

"Remove that contraption."

She unstrapped the wand holster.

Voldemort touched the Dark Mark with one long, thin finger.

It burned. Meredith's eyes watered, and she clenched her teeth, determined not to scream. And at the same time, she was trying hard not to cry. Too late. Blood dripped down her cheek.

"Very impressive. No screaming. And I'm sorry I don't have a handkerchief for you to wipe your face."

"It's okay." She took Sirius Black's handkerchief out of her pocket and wiped her cheek.

"Do you know why I did that, Miss Snape?"

"To punish me for still being friends with Harry Potter?"

"No. That was to remind you of which side you are on, Miss Snape. I do not mind that you are friends with Potter. But you must remember where, in the end, your loyalties lie." He paused and took on a lighter tone. "How is your relationship with the Longbottom boy?"

_Grr. Why do you care?_ "It's fine."

"No, it is now. Send your father in. You may go."

"Thank you, my lord." When she was outside of the door and her father was in the room, Meredith let out a long breath. Since when did Lord Voldemort care about fashion? And how could she do what she had to do?

Meredith subconsciously touched her arm. It stung. This was really serious. If she didn't do what Voldemort had told her she would need to do, well, let's just say she would most certainly be in some deep Dark Lord doo-doo.

* * *

**11/11/12 - Honor a Veteran!**

**And sorry for not updating in forever. I've been attempting to have a life lately. Sort of worked. (Right, Clarinetist?)  
**

**New chapter already written. Just need to type it. I appreciate reviews and favorites and other stuff because it gives me some emails in my inbox. And I like hearing from you guys!  
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	22. Long Term Plans

**This chapter contains a few direct quotes from Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, which I do not own the rights to.**

Chapter Twenty-Two: Long Term Plans

"Career Advice: All fifth years will be required to attend a short meeting with their Head of House during the first week of the summer term, in which they will be given the opportunity to discuss their future careers. Times of individual appointments are listed below."

Meredith internally freaked out. The OWLs were more important than she had thought. It was almost the equivalent of an SAT test. Sort of. She started studying more and daydreaming less.

And because Neville needed to study a lot too, Meredith chose to study at a different table without him, all the way across the library. It saved her a lot of paranoia.

Constantly nagging at her mind was the task the Dark Lord had appointed her to do. She didn't want to do it. She would be considered a traitor forever and forever. She didn't want to be a traitor. Why couldn't she just be neutral?! Both sides of this war were pretty dumb.

What do you want to be when you grow up? The question that haunted every kid since kindergarten was coming back. What did she want to be? First, what were her options? She didn't want to teach, that was for sure. And she didn't want to work for the Ministry of Magic, either. What else was there? Studying dragons like Charlie Weasley, or working for Gringotts like Bill?

Classes started up again, and Meredith drowned herself in books, studying every day, and running when she got frustrated. She didn't know how far she ran each day, or for how long. She lost track of the days and only surfaced on Saturdays for an hour or so to sit with Neville by the lake. Other than that, most of the time they didn't even see one another.

Sooner than Meredith could believe, the day of her career appointment arrived. She closed her books and put them back on the shelves, picked up her bag, and headed towards the library door.

And took a detour past Neville's table, where he was surrounded by stacks of books and rolls of parchment.

"Hey," she said. Neville didn't respond. "Hey," she said again, a little louder. "Earth to Neville Longbottom."

"Hmm?" He looked up. "Hi, Meredith." He stood up, spilling the books off his lap onto the floor. "Oops."

Meredith helped him pick up his books as they talked. "How's your studying going?" she asked him.

"It's okay. I've been in here every afternoon. Gran says if I don't study enough, I'll never be able to become an Auror like my parents. How's your studying going?"

"Good. I've been here almost every day too. I need to go to a career advice whatever thing now."

"Really? Mine was yesterday." He paused.

"And?"

He shook his head, and they both put the books back on the table.

"I'd better go now," Meredith said, glancing around. Seeing that her father wasn't around, she quickly hugged Neville, said goodbye, and left. Once out of the library, she looked a clock on the wall and saw that she was going to be late. "Shoot," she murmured, and took off running.

She arrived at the door to her father's office just in time. She smoothed her skirt, made sure there wasn't lint on her school shirt, straightened her tie, and walked in.

Should she have predicted that the new "Headmistress" would be there? Maybe. But did that make it any less of a shock when she walked in to find Professor Umbridge standing next to her father?

Definitely not!

They were talking. Severus Snape was seated at his desk, and Professor Umbridge was standing next to his chair. For once, Umbridge was taller than someone who wasn't a first year. It made Professor Snape look tiny and powerless as Umbridge towered over him, commanded him.

"Ah, Miss Snape, you're here," Umbridge said in her squeaky voice that Meredith still had difficulties listening to. With a puckered smile on her lips, she looked at her little pink wristwatch. "Right on time. Let's get started. Sit down, please."

Meredith slowly perched on the edge of the wooden chair in front of her father's desk. For some reason, Umbridge remained standing. Meredith's father sat forward in his chair, leaning as far away from Umbridge as possible.

He cleared his throat. "Have you thought about possible career paths, Meredith?"

"Um, sort of. Not really."

"What subjects do you enjoy most?"

"All of them."

Severus Snape took a deep breath. "I know you enjoy music, but do you have any other hobbies?"

The way they were both staring at her made Meredith want to stutter and yell "I don't know!" As she was taking a breath, Umbridge said, "Might I suggest, Meredith, that you pursue a career at the Ministry of Magic?"

_Never ever!_ Meredith thought. _The Ministry are morons!_ "Maybe."

"I've noticed you are very quiet in class. Perhaps a position in the Department of Mysteries? As an Unspeakable, even?"

Severus Snape appeared alarmed at the word "unspeakable."

Meredith appeared alarmed at the words "Department of Mysteries."

"Have you looked through the pamphlets in you common room?" Umbridge continued.

"Some. They were kind of boring."

"Ah, well, you should look through them. You may find some careers that will interest you. Oh! Would you be at all interested in Muggle Relations? Your father tells me you were raised in America, Meredith, with Muggles."

"Yes."

"Good. Promise me you will consider it. How is your mother? Have you spoken to her lately?"

Meredith looked at her father; he widened his eyes a little and nodded slightly.

"Yes, I've talked to her. I called her up on the phone last week. She's doing alright."

"Wonderful. Remember to look through those leaflets in the common room."

And that was the end of the career meeting. Meredith was dismissed, and returned to the library as though nothing had happened, even though something really had, and it concerned her.

Twenty minutes later, two male voices whispered in her ears, "Hello Severusette."

She jumped a foot in the air. "Fred! George!" she whisper-snapped. "You freaking scared me!"

"Well that's always half the fun, now isn't it?" said George.

Meredith sighed and rolled her eyes as Fred spoke. "We need to talk for a little bit. Meet us by the broom cupboard in the charms corridor in twenty minutes."

"Okay. But what's this about?" The twins had already left the library.

_What the heck? Oh well._

Meredith subtly started packing up her things until she only had one book out. Eventually, she closed the book and left the library.

In the charms corridor, Meredith peeked in each of the empty classrooms and stood beside the broom cupboard for a moment. She was opening her book to read some while waiting for Fred and George, when the door to the classroom next to the broom cupboard opened and Meredith was pulled inside by the sleeve of her cardigan.

"There's nobody out there! What was that for?"

"Shhhh! Umbridge has spies!"

"Yeah, and technically I'm one of them. What was it you wanted to tell me, guys?"

Fred handed her a ring of what looked like tiny wire keys.

"Lock picks?"

"_Magic_ lock picks. Because everything here is _magic_, Severusette. They're for tomorrow."

George told her, "They unlock any door, including ones with protective enchantments, like Umbridge's office door probably does."

"Oh. Got a new addition to the Skiving Snackboxes?"

"Nope."

"Better." George presented her with a light rectangular box.

"What's this?"

"Portable swamp. Just add water."

"What we need you to do, Severusette, is this: tomorrow after lessons, go up to Gregory the Smarmy's corridor—"

"Where's that?"

"East Wing."

"How convenient. My class is near there."

"We _know_, Severusette."

"Stalkers."

"Anyway, you go to the corridor _directly_ after lessons, sprinkle some of this all around while everyone's rushing to get back to their common rooms, we set this off, and you high-tail it to Umbridge's office, where you break the enchantments on the door using the lock picks, and you're done."

"But there are _two_ of you. Why can't one of you do the swamp—which, by the way, sounds awesome—while the other goes to Umbridge's office? Why do I need to unlock the door anyway?"

"One: if one of us leaves the scene, we miss all the action. Two: you need to unlock the door so no alarms go off when Harry Potter goes in there to use the Floo network. Three: you're on the Inquisitorial Squad and you're good at making up excuses, so Umbridge will never suspect if she sees you around her office."

"Gotcha. Tomorrow. Okay then. If that's all, I should probably get back to studying in the library."

"Oh, and speaking of the library, Severusette—"

"How's…" Both Fred and George got huge grins on their faces. Fred raised his eyebrows.

"None of your business," Meredith said, opening the door.

"Oh yes it is," George protested.

"Yeah. We keep track of Ginny, so why shouldn't we keep track of what our other sister is doing?"

"Well, there's nothing really eventful happening."

"Understood. We'd be careful if our mum was around all the time, and your dad is more strict than our mum."

"Yeah." Meredith left, and returned to the library with the box of instant swamp –how ridiculously insane was that?! Instant swamp! It was like instant oatmeal, only better!—in the bottom of her backpack. She would need to be careful not to spill any water on it.

* * *

Meredith woke up the next morning tired after a restless night. Tom Riddle had come into her dream and asked her whose side she was on. "_I am beginning to doubt your loyalty,_" he kept saying.

"_But I am_," she kept telling him. Every time she said it, she became more convinced it was a lie.

"_Then sever all ties with the other side. I have Harry Potter in the palm of my hand. I am beginning to doubt…_"

Meredith went into the bathroom and washed her face. Then she looked in the mirror. _Gee, I'm going to start having self-esteem problems soon if these nightmares don't stop,_ she thought, purposely avoiding looking in the mirror again.

She showered, dressed, and braided her hair to keep it out of the way. Her bangs were getting curly enough that she couldn't see well enough, so she pinned them back and hoped for the best. What she really needed was some mousse to keep all of her hair in order, but there wasn't time to experiment.

Nothing of consequence happened that day, except that everything seemed quieter than normal. Either that, or Meredith was just very on edge.

The day passed, and nobody Meredith talked to even saw Peeves around. Students were coming and going in and out of classes for their career advice meetings.

After Potions was lunch, so Meredith stayed after class to ask her father a question about her career meeting. Before she had gone a few steps toward the from of the empty room, her father said, "I know what you're here for. Your mother was _not_ a Muggle from America, and she _is_ dead. What Dolores Umbridge knows is a lie."

"Okay. Why couldn't we keep a consistent story and just tell her the truth?"

"If too many people know what is real, it will not turn out to our advantage."

"Oh. Okay. I'll just, um, go now." She walked out of the classroom and let out a long breath, hurrying to lunch.

When the last class of the day finally came, Meredith tapped her toes the entire time, waiting for it to end. It didn't help that it was a double class period.

The teacher let them out early from class, and Meredith purposely took a long time packing up. When the bell went, there would be more people and nobody would see her scattering instant swamp all over the floor.

She made her way to Gregory the Smarmy's corridor and held the box of swamp. The bell rang, and the turmoil began. Meredith wove through the throng of people, sprinkling swamp as she went, occasionally reaching into her robes for another handful from the box.

It took a few minutes to snake through from one side of the corridor to the other and back again. When she finally made it out, Meredith ran across the school to Umbridge's office, arriving a few minutes later, out of breath and with sore feet. The chaos about the swamp was already beginning, and students were flooding (no pun intended) to the East Wing to see what everything was about.

Umbridge was marching down the hall towards Professor McGonagall. Meredith slipped into the classroom and shut the door behind her. Then she ran up the stairs at the front of the room to Umbridge's office and took the lock picks out of her pocket, careful not to ouch the door and set off any alarms. She found the best fitting pick, put it in the lock, and left the door closed. Then she sprinted back down the stairs to the door.

It didn't open. _Shoot, I locked myself in! Alohomora!_ She peeked out into the corridor. There were a lot more students than before, but the crowd was thinning quickly. Umbridge was still down the hall, so Meredith slipped behind a suit of armor and melded in with a group of passing students. She looked back to see Harry ducking behind the same suit of armor, about to enter Umbridge's lair.

Cho Chang was passing by. "What happened?" Meredith asked her. She fell into step alongside Cho.

"I don't know. Probably a prank or something. It's been very quiet around the castle lately."

"True." Meredith looked behind them. Umbridge had gone, probably to sort out the swamp issue.

"Are you coming to the next quidditch match?" Cho asked.

"Maybe. It's Hufflepuff and Slytherin, right?"

"Yes."

"_All members of the Inquisitorial Squad…_"

"I have to go," Meredith told Cho. "I'll see you in History tomorrow." She fast-walked up the stairs she had flown down minutes before, and nearly fell into a fake step.

Members of the Inquisitorial Squad were surrounding the swamp part of the corridor, and _(Shoot!)_ Fred and George were stuck in the middle, surrounded by murky green water and sand.

"So, you think it's funny to turn a school corridor into a swamp, do you?"

"Yeah, pretty funny."

_Oo, Fred and George, you are going to get it from Umbridge._

It went downhill from there. Filch came with permission to whip students. What was the school coming to?

"George, I think we've outgrown full-time education."

"Yeah, I've been feeling that way myself, Fred."

"_Accio brooms!_"

Meredith ducked to avoid getting hit in the head with an iron peg dangling from one of the brooms flying overhead.

"We won't be seeing you," the twins said.

The whole school learned that there was a new Weasley joke shop in Diagon Alley, and Fred and George flew over the swamp and out of the corridor. Meredith ducked again.

"Give her hell from us, Peeves," Fred said. What happened next, Meredith couldn't be sure of. Either it was a trick of the light, or Fred _winked_ at her.

Then they were gone, and Umbridge, who was standing a few feet in front of Meredith, threw a tantrum.

* * *

**I've been noticing there are a lot of readers on my stories this month. But no new reviews! It makes me sad, so please review and tell me what you think.**


	23. Miss Snape, Investigator and Inquirer

Chapter Twenty-Three: Miss Snape, Investigator and Inquirer

At dinner that night, Meredith saw a note at the place where she usually sat. A pink note. It had her name on it, so she opened it and read:

* * *

Dear Meredith,

I would much appreciate if you would care to join me for tea in my office at 7:30 this evening. There will be no need to reply or bring friends.

Dolores J. Umbridge, Headmistress

* * *

It was because Fred had winked at her. Why had he done that anyway? Was his last and final goal at Hogwarts to get Meredith in trouble?

Meredith had no choice but to go to Umbridge's office at 7:30, after returning to Slytherin dungeon to study for a while. She knocked on the office door.

"Come in," came Umbridge's sugar coated poison voice. Meredith opened the door and almost died of pinkness. It was all around the room. It was definitely a good thing that Umbridge couldn't get into Dumbledore's office.

"Sit down, dear," Umbridge said with a smile. Meredith reluctantly sat in a fluffy pink chair in front of the desk. "Would you like milk and sugar in your tea, Miss Snape?"

"No, thank you, Professor."

Umbridge's smile faltered for a second. "Well you can't possibly drink it plain!"

"Yeah, actually, that's what I always used to do."

"You must try a little sugar in it, though! This tea is very strong." Umbridge then made a point of standing up, going to a side table, and putting sugar in Meredith's tea, all the time with her back to Meredith.

_What, does she think I'm stupid or something?_ Meredith thought, resolving not to even take the smallest sip of that tea. When Umbridge came back, she set the tea on a saucer in front of Meredith, and sat down with a satisfied smirk.

It appeared as though Umbridge had added some milk to Meredith's tea, in addition to the sugar, for the two cups were exactly identical.

"Drink up," Meredith was told. She took a fake sip of tea, because even a person who hadn't watched four seasons of CSI could tell that there was something bad in there. As she took a fake sip, Meredith also took a slight sniff. There wasn't anything unusual or poisonous, or anything that smelled like the potions lab, so Meredith was pretty sure she wouldn't die if she drank it. But she had read something about a potion that didn't have a smell or taste…

"So, Meredith, did you have anything to do with the Weasley twins' escape from justice?"

"No. Why?"

"Because one of them winked at you."

"Oh. Yeah. I don't know why he did that."

"If I recall correctly, you are with a Neville Longbottom. Am I right?" Meredith nodded. "And you remain eight inches apart at all times." Meredith nodded again. "Good girl. Drink your tea. It's so much better with milk and sugar, is it not?"

"Oh yes." Meredith took another fake sip.

"You are absolutely sure you have had nothing to do with the Weasleys?"

"Yes, Professor."

"Hmm. Empty your pockets, please."

"What?"

"I said, please empty your pockets, Miss Snape."

_Shoot._

Meredith stood up and spilled her life in mementoes on the desk. Her broken fife. Her parents' wedding picture. The fake Sickle. The fake Galleon. A Muggle pen and pencil. Her elder and blue phoenix wand.

Umbridge opened the envelope and looked at the picture. She examined the coins, and clicked the Muggle pen a few times. "Interesting," she said. "Is that all?"

"Yes." Meredith turned her pockets inside out to show that there was nothing more in them. She was very uncomfortable with Umbridge seeing those things, especially the photograph.

"Hm. Why haven't you drunk any of your tea yet, Miss Snape? Your cup is completely full still! Drink up!"

There was a knock at the door, and Umbridge went to answer it. Meredith took the opportunity to switch her cup of tea with Umbridge's. Umbridge hadn't drunk any of her tea either. Risking that there might still be fever fudge in the sugar, Meredith took a gulp of tea…

And fought not to gag. Umbridge must've put five tablespoons of sugar in her tea! It didn't even taste like tea any more!

Umbridge returned to her desk after speaking with Filch about how to remove the swamp from the corridor, and she took a sip of her (formerly Meredith's) tea. And another sip.

Veritaserum! The truth-telling potion! That was what was in the tea! Colorless, odorless, and tasteless. Meredith could ask Umbridge any question she wanted, and she would get a truthful answer.

"Professor Umbridge, are you in love with the Minister of Magic?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Well, a lot of people seem to think you are."

Umbridge sighed uncharacteristically. "I suppose I am." She seemed afraid to admit it.

_Wouldn't Fred and George be proud!_ Their little sister was becoming a trouble-making sneak like them. "Like, how much do you love him, Professor?"

"Oh, not enough to do anything about it. He has a wife, you know. And I'm merely a secretary to him. A very highly positioned secretary, I might add. But just a secretary."

"Did you go to school with him?"

"Yes. We were here at Hogwarts together. And all of the girls would say 'Dolores, don't be daft; Cornelius Fudge will never be anyone in the world.' Guess where they are now."

"I'll bet you could re-connect on Facebook and be all like 'told ya' and they'd be hecka ticked."

"What _are_ you talking about, Miss Snape?"

"Never mind. Back to Cornelius Fudge…"

"I would prefer not to talk about it. Drink your tea." The veritaserum had worn off that quickly.

"You had better get back to your dormitory, Miss Snape. I'm now sure you had nothing to do with the Weasley brothers."

"Thank you, Professor. Good night."

"Good night, Miss Snape."

And "Miss Snape" went back to Slytherin dungeon, considering herself lucky.

That night she dreamt of the instructions Voldemort had given her. She dreamt that Sirius Black was being tortured in Row 97 of those blue orbs. And then it was Neville, and Meredith woke up crying. And then everyone was dying in Row 97, and she woke up crying again.


	24. STRESS!

**Can anyone tell I wrote this during finals week?**

Chapter Twenty-Four: STRESS!

Meredith ended up getting off easy because Umbridge didn't remember anything about their tea meeting. Meredith walked around the castle with the satisfaction that she knew something embarrassing about Umbridge.

At the quidditch match between Hufflepuff and Slytherin, Luna Lovegood came up to Meredith and talked to her.

"Dad heard something about Umbridge from someone at the Ministry. They're keeping it hushed up, but I wanted to know if it's true."

"Yeah. I know what you're talking about." She whispered, "It's about Umbridge liking the Minister, isn't it?"

"Oh, I had heard that Cornelius Fudge was planning on leaving his wife."

"Well you can shoot that rumor down right away!" Umbridge may be an evil witch, but she didn't deserve to have her reputation ruined any more than it already was. Neither did the Minister of Magic, even though he was a disbelieving trout. Meredith laughed, and waited until the Slytherin cheers—they had apparently just scored a goal—died out to ask Luna, "Was your dad planning on writing an article about it for The Quibbler?"

"No. It isn't really interesting if it isn't true, and besides, there is too much new research coming out about the Krumple-Horned Snorkack. The magazine will be filled with that for weeks. They're amazing creatures, really. Have you ever heard of them? You probably haven't. They're really rare…"

Luna was off on a tangent about the Krumple-Horned Snorkack. She only stopped talking when Hannah Abbot and Ernie MacMillan approached.

"Hi Meredith," Hannah said. "Long time no see. We thought you might be here at the game."

"Of course I'm here. Even though I'm not actually rooting for my house. I needed a break from the library."

"Yeah?" Ernie said. He was shifting from foot to foot anxiously. "I need to get back there. Saturdays are my good study days. Last Saturday I did eighteen hours, without even a break for lunch. On good weekdays I can get seven or eight hours. I need to get back to the library! Can I _please_ go back, Hannah?"

"Ernie, you've been out of the library for ten minutes. Relax!"

"Oh, are you the one who's always hidden behind a fortress of books and parchment at the end of the library?" Luna asked Ernie. "I suggest you keep less books around you; there are wrackspurts in them. I felt one floating around the other day. I need to get a charm to ward them off. Maybe it could go with my charm against nargles…" Luna toyed with her necklace.

"Anyway," Hannah turned back to Meredith, "we just wanted to say hi again."

"How much are you studying?" Ernie's question, of course.

"Not nearly as much as you are. How much sleep are you getting, Ernie?"

"Five to six hours a night."

"Well you shouldn't do that. Sleep helps you process information and remember it. You'll feel better if you get at least seven hours of sleep, and preferably nine."

"Okay. I'll remember that. But I still need to study more!"

They talked about Umbridge (and that Meredith was on the Inquisitorial Squad), Fred and George's escape (and the swamp still in Gregory the Smarmy's corridor), Dumbledore being gone (lots of complaints there), and the stress of O.W.L.s.

After the game, which Slytherin only narrowly won by catching the Snitch, they walked to the library. Ernie at once took refuge amid the stacks of books. Hannah stayed to talk more with Meredith.

"So, how's life?" Hannah asked. They were in a rather remote part of the library.

"It's alright."

"I heard your dad gave you a hard time a few months back."

March. "Right. Yeah."

"I've been wanting to tell you, I think his reaction was expected, and any parent who spent even a day at Hogwarts would be shocked at some of the things they'd see."

Spoken like a true, logical Hufflepuff. "I agree. I knew how he would react, I just didn't think of him being there right then."

"Hmm."

Sensing that the conversation was dwindling down and becoming awkward, Meredith made an excuse and left for the Slytherin common room, where she browsed through career pamphlets for half an hour.

The last weekend in May was the last quidditch game of the season. Meredith didn't really care who won because she had friends in both Ravenclaw and Gryffindor. She was betting that Ravenclaw would win, simply because Ron was an awful Keeper.

Before the game, there was an Inquisitorial Squad meeting in Umbridge's office.

"Good morning, everyone," Umbridge began. Meredith cringed. "As you all know, today is the last quidditch game." _No duh. Shut up_. "I'm expecting the game itself will go as customary. It is what may happen after the game that concerns me." _Oh boy. Why, pray tell?_ "Gryffindor house being a rowdy bunch, to say the least, my worry is that good sportsmanship will be forgotten. Your job, as the Inquisitorial Squad, is to ensure that conflicts are resolved, and inform me of any unruly behavior. Is that clear?"

"Yes, Professor," chorused the Inquisitorial Squad, some of whom were smiling way to genuinely to be imagining any sane way to use their newly-given authority. Malfoy was wearing his usual smirk.

They were all forced to walk across the field together beside Umbridge, and ascend to the section of the teacher's box that Dumbledore usually occupied.

The game didn't interest Meredith at all, so she tried to block out the chants of "Weasley is our King" and looked off into the distance. The mountains were visible from here, and the sky was almost completely clear. It was an ideal Saturday for sitting by the lake, but that likely wouldn't happen. Meredith would go down there regardless, maybe even with her guitar, which she would have to sneak down seven floors. If she got caught, she would be in big trouble; she was sure Umbridge remembered Fred's wink, and a musical instrument would only make things worse.

A flock of birds suddenly took flight from a tree in the Forbidden Forest. Meredith thought she heard a tree creaking loudly, but the sound was completely drowned out as Ravenclaw scored yet another goal. Odd.

The game wasn't looking good for Gryffindor. If Ginny didn't catch the Snitch soon, they would definitely lose.

Meredith looked down into the stands, trying to spot her friends. She located Neville by his half gold, half maroon painted face. Luna's lion hat was not in attendance because she was in Ravenclaw, but nevertheless, her bleach-blond head was easy to find. Hannah wasn't easy to see, and Ernie was undoubtedly in the library again.

The crowd roared so loudly that the game announcer almost couldn't be heard.

"And Weasley blocks the middle hoop! Johnson traveling towards the Ravenclaw side with the Quaffle…an excellent pass to Bell, and it's ten points for Gryffindor!"

Meredith's ears exploded. How was it that seven hundred students spread out in a huge stadium could be louder than a thousand in a tiny gymnasium?

Ron was successfully blocking all of the Ravenclaw Chasers' attempts at scoring. Meredith looked down to see how Harry and Hermione were reacting, but she couldn't find them.

Ginny caught the Snitch, and Gryffindor won the game by a landslide. The team was awarded the Quidditch Cup, and they paraded around the field, some on brooms, and the ones on the ground carrying Ron on their shoulders.

It was time to mediate.

"Gather round everyone." Umbridge clapped her hands to call their attention.

_What, are we five-year-olds?_

"Mr. Crabbe and Mr. Goyle, you may take the north section of the stadium. Mr. Zabini and Mr. Nott, the south section. Mr. Malfoy and Miss Snape, please monitor the area between the stands and the castle. Everyone else, patrol the halls. We'll meet up in my office in half an hour."

They descended through the stands and went to their posts. Draco and Meredith stood at the halfway point between the quidditch pitch and the castle entrance, just watching students walk past. There were no fights, probably because Ravenclaw and Gryffindor weren't rivals.

"So, Draco, how are you doing?"

"Well. I suppose."

"How's studying?"

"All right. What about you, Snape? Still hanging out with the Longbottom catastrophe?"

Meredith didn't answer. Instead, she retorted, "Are you still with that Parkinson brat?"

Draco didn't answer.

"Thought so."

When all the students had gone into the castle, Meredith and Draco headed up the stairs to Umbridge's office. The Inquisitorial Squad meeting was short, because there hadn't been many fights to report. If the game had been Gryffindor versus Slytherin, there would have been a thousand.

After the meeting, Meredith went to the library for a little while to study. When she got sick of studying, she went upstairs to the Room of Requirement and played piano. There was a window in the Room, instead of a magic mirror. The weather looked perfect outside, and Meredith couldn't help but go.

And sneak down seven floors with a guitar.

Or, alternately, jump out the window an fly or fall down seven floors. Yes, that was the way to go. Not _go,_ as in _die_, but _go_ as in _get out of the castle_.

As she was opening the window, Meredith spotted a broom in a corner of the room.

Five minutes later, Meredith was sitting against the tree by the lake, playing guitar quietly so nobody would hear her.

After a little while, she thought she heard footsteps rustling through the grass. She stopped to listen, and suddenly became very afraid. It could be Umbridge. It could be her father. It could be Draco. It could be Nagini. It could be freaking Lord Vol—

"Hey Meredith."

It was Neville. "Oh hey. You scared me for a second there." She relaxed and sat back against the tree.

"Something on your mind?"

To tell the truth, there was a lot on her mind. There was the growing pink shadow of Umbridge-ness, the pressure of OWLs, Voldemort…

"Just the usual stuff. Stressing about OWLs, you know?"

Neville sat down next to her on the grass. "Meredith, I think I've known you long enough to say that whenever you end a sentence with 'you know,' there's something you're not telling me."

Shoot. He was right. She would have to work on that. "I—I know. It's just, there's some stuff I _can't_ tell you, under any circumstances. I'm sorry."

"It's all right. I get it."

"It's nothing personal, I promise."

"I know." They were both silent for some time.

"Neville, you've been here for almost five full years, and I've been told what happened. Have you noticed that all of the climactic, horrible events happen near the end of the year?"

"Well, let's see. First year Quirrel got killed. Second year was the Chamber of Secrets and the basilisk and Ginny. Third year…I don't know what happened. Sirius Black escaped."

"Harry and Hermione time-traveled and saved Sirius Black and Buckbeak the hippogriff, and Lupin was a werewolf."

"Right. Then last year was the Triwizard Tournament, Cedric Diggory died, and You Know Who came back."

"Exactly. Everything bad happened at the end of the year. And I'm getting a feeling that—that this year is going to be worse."

"Worse? How?"

"I don't know. But a lot worse."

"Did…Did You Know Who tell you this?"

She felt a sharp pain in her left arm. "Ouch!"

"What is it?"

Meredith couldn't speak. She choked to get the words out, but none came, until finally she managed to say, "I have to go." She got up quickly with her guitar and broom, and marched toward the castle.

"Where are you going? Are you okay? Merry!"

She turned around and gave him a look. "Since when do you call me Merry?"

"I—I don't know. If you don't want me to call you that, I won't. But that doesn't matter right now. What matters is whether or not you're okay!"

"I'm fine, or at least, I'll be fine soon." Her neck itched. She scratched it.

"Your eyes are red," Neville observed.

"I know that. Fake blood keeps me awake like caffeine. I've been drinking it every day now."

"Meredith, you're getting pale."

"Am I?"

"Yeah." He took the guitar and held her hand.

And for some odd reason, her arm felt a little better.

"That was quick. Your color is coming back."

"I feel tired." Neville let go of her hand, and the pain returned. "No!" She grabbed his hand and held it tightly.

"Meredith, what's going on?"

"I _don't know_, okay?! I think it's because I tried to tell you. He's asked me before what side I'm on, and I know he doesn't believe me."

"But this is Hogwarts. You're safe here. He can't hurt you." He kissed her cheek, and for a split-second, there was no pain at all. "Do you want to go to your father?"

"No. I think it's fine now. Let's just find something else to talk about."

They went back to the lake and sat under the tree, hand in hand. They avoided to topic of OWLs and instead talked about summer plans. Neither one knew what they were going to do. Meredith told him she might get a job to kill the days, and earn some money to start out with after seventh year.

When it started getting dark, they went to the Room of Requirement, where Meredith left her broom and guitar.

She only let go of Neville's hand at the last minute before they went into the Great Hall for dinner.

* * *

**Dear Readers,**

**Thank you for reading this story. "Merry" Christmas (late) and "Harry" New Year! Ha ha.**

**I thought I'd run an idea past y'all: my friends and I are thinking of making a trailer for The Horrid Truth (and maybe one for this story later, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it). So if you have any ideas as to how to begin it, or if you want to tell me about a scene you really want to see, your input would be much appreciated. I'm having a little trouble writing it. Thank you.**


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